Undercover Baby
Rebecca Winters
The baby surprise…Diana Rawlins has turned up at the hospital with amnesia and a baby in her arms! She doesn't remember how either of them happened. Her husband, Cal, is determined to get to the bottom of the mystery–especially since one of the things his wife doesn't remember is being married to him!Diana only seems to care about one thing–the baby Cal knows can't possibly be hers. But he isn' t going to give Diana up without a fight. If the baby if the key to her heart, he'll move heaven and earth to ensure that his new family can stay together.Love UndercoverTheir mission was marriage!
Letter to Reader (#u89cb69f9-a082-5999-b4a2-c1afb772622c)Title Page (#u6557e6a1-bee4-5bcd-9446-5f029953f842)CHAPTER ONE (#u0b20358f-8b4d-5fcb-8871-ff2126e49cc1)CHAPTER TWO (#ua6dd9832-5453-5da1-b124-da365705f3e4)CHAPTER THREE (#uba5ac2b4-73e2-52ea-97b7-87eeb4d92ea1)CHAPTER FOUR (#litres_trial_promo)CHAPTER FIVE (#litres_trial_promo)CHAPTER SIX (#litres_trial_promo)CHAPTER SEVEN (#litres_trial_promo)CHAPTER EIGHT (#litres_trial_promo)CHAPTER NINE (#litres_trial_promo)CHAPTER TEN (#litres_trial_promo)EPILOGUE (#litres_trial_promo)Copyright (#litres_trial_promo)
Welcome to the third of Rebecca Winters’ brand-new trilogy LOVE UNDERCOVER.
An award-winning author, Rebecca Winters writes romances that pack an emotional punch you won’t forget! And her new miniseries is no exception.
Meet Annabelle, Gerard and Diana. Annabelle and Gerard are private investigators, Diana, their hardworking assistant. Each of them is about to face a rather different assignment—faling in love!
Dear Reader,
Amnesia is a condition that has always fascinated me because it sets up so many possibilities for the person suffering from it, as well as the loved ones who must deal with it.
Recently I heard a story about a woman who lost her memory forever. As a result she divorced her husband. But this man loved her so much, he set out to win her love all over again. Six years later they were married.
I could only imagine the pain he went through, the rejection, the sacrifices he made, the challenges he faced because of his love for this woman. But as I imagined this, my own story, Undercover Baby, came to life. It’s my personal tribute to this hero of a man who lived every word of the vows he made.
Happy reading,
Rebecca Winters
Undercover Baby
Rebecca Winters
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
CHAPTER ONE
“IS THIS the Rawlins’s residence?”
Cal Rawlins looped the bath towel around his neck, ready to put down the receiver in case it was a telemarketer. Seven-thirty in the morning was a little early to start listening to their unsolicited spiel.
If making love to his beautiful wife hadn’t put him in such a good mood before he’d reluctantly let her out of bed on this beautiful June morning, he might have said he wasn’t interested and then hung up.
“Yes, it is.”
“This is the Bonneville Regional Hospital emergency room calling. Please don’t be alarmed. The situation is not life threatening, but we have a Diana Rawlins here. Except for being disoriented from a fall, she appears to be all right. An initial examination reveals that the baby is jaundiced, but unharmed. A staff pediatrician has taken charge of his care. If you could come over—”
The mention of a baby filled Cal with unmitigated relief. “My wife’s at work and we don’t have any children.” Not yet anyway. “I’m afraid you have the wrong Rawlins. Sorry.”
He clicked off the phone and went back to the bathroom to finish shaving. His thoughts turned to their childless marriage, the only cloud threatening their happiness because she wanted to give him a baby so badly.
In the four years since their wedding, Diana had suffered three miscarriages, generally losing them at eight weeks. The last one had been devastating to both of them because she’d lost it after carrying it almost four months. A long enough time for them to decorate a nursery.
It had been a boy. They would have called him Tyler, after her grandfather.
When in future she conceived again, she would have to take it very easy and the doctor would perform a surgical procedure on the uterus to prevent the same problem from recurring. But so far, Diana hadn’t conceived and she was frantic that she might never have a child.
Their obstetrician suggested that she was trying too hard, that she needed to relax and give her body a chance to rest before they tried to get pregnant again. Cal recognized the wisdom of the doctor’s sound advice, but getting Diana to take it was a different story.
Cal had brought up the idea of adoption, but she’d adamantly refused to entertain it as a viable alternative. Still, he’d discussed the problem with Roman Lufka. Cal’s best friend and Diana’s boss at the LFK Associates International.
Both Roman and Cal agreed that if a baby were suddenly to become available, she might reconsider adoption. Oftentimes after obtaining a first child through legal means, a woman unexpectedly conceived. If time proved that Diana couldn’t carry a baby full term, then the adoption idea was worth pursuing. Roman had his sources and said he would look into them.
Naturally Cal would have loved a baby of his own body and hers, but if that wasn’t possible, then he welcomed the idea of adoption. Diana’s happiness meant more to him than anything else. They had an exceptional marriage. He would do whatever it took to preserve the great love they shared. She was his life!
While Cal finished getting dressed for work, he decided to call his friend and suggest that they get together for lunch later in the day. Maybe Roman had new information on the subject.
His hand no sooner reached for the phone to call Roman than it rang again. When he picked up the receiver and said hello, he learned it was the hospital disturbing him for the second time. His brows formed a dark frown line.
“Mr. Rawlins? You do live at 18 Haxton Place here in Salt Lake?”
“Yes? But as I told you before, we don’t have a baby.”
“Nevertheless this woman says she’s the baby’s mother. We checked her driver’s license. The address is listed as 18 Haxton Place, the same as yours.” An odd chill passed through his body. “She’s five feet six inches, long blond hair, green eyes, one hundred and twenty-four pounds.”
Tightening his grip on the receiver he said, “That’s my wife. Would it be possible to speak to her?”
“Not right now. As I told you a few minutes ago, the fall dazed her.”
When did she fall? Where?
“I’ll be right there.”
Feeling like he’d been kicked in the gut, he raced out of the house. Disobeying the speed limit, he drove his Saab to the hospital in record time.
He swallowed hard when he spotted her white Buick parked halfway up the block. Its presence confirmed that she had indeed driven to the hospital earlier that morning. She’d only been gone from the house a little more than an hour.
What in the hell had happened in that amount of time? The mention of a baby made no sense at all.
“I’m Mr. Rawlins,” he said the second he reached the admission desk outside the emergency room doors. “I’d like to see my wife, Diana.”
“Take a seat over there and someone will be right with you.”
With his adrenaline pumping, Cal preferred to remain standing. He would just as soon not have to look at all the anxious people who filled the reception area.
Thankfully the person who’d called the house had reassured him Diana’s condition wasn’t serious.
“Mr. Rawlins? I’m Dr. Farr, the one who first examined your wife. Come on in here and we’ll talk.”
Relieved to get some answers at last, Cal followed the short, wiry doctor through another set of doors to an empty examination room. He thought of course the other man would take him straight to Diana. The fact that he didn’t, served to deepen the pit in Cal’s stomach.
“Is my wife all right? That’s all I want to know.”
Dr. Farr looked up at Cal. “When she fell, she hit the back of her head hard enough to break the skin and form a small lump. The X ray didn’t reveal anything abnormal, but her concussion has left her disoriented. I’ve asked Dr. Harkness, a neurosurgeon on staff at the hospital, to come down and examine her. He should be here shortly.”
When the significance of his words sank in, Cal’s head reared back. “How bad is her disorientation?”
The other man eyed Cal compassionately. “A couple of ambulance attendants found her outside the emergency room entrance. She was sitting on the pavement in a dazed condition, clutching her baby.
“She couldn’t remember her name, where she lived, or what she was doing there. They had to look inside her purse for identification so they could call you.”
Good Lord.
Cal’s body broke out in a cold sweat. “Did someone see her fall? How do you know she wasn’t attacked?”
“We assume she slipped on the cement. The path is on an incline, so she probably fell backward. There was blood where her head hit, and the backs of her elbows are skinned. The baby didn’t appear to suffer any injury, but as you were told earlier, his bilirubin count is too high. To treat him for the jaundice, the pediatrician has put him under the lights.”
Cal shook his head in disbelief. “I have no idea whose baby it is.”
“A friend’s perhaps?”
“Possibly, though I can’t think of anyone close to us. Maybe Diana offered to baby-sit someone’s child and forgot to tell me. But I don’t see how that could be when she was on her way to work.”
“Well, it shouldn’t be too long before your wife starts to recall what happened.”
“I hope you’re right. Can I see her now?”
“Of course. Come with me. Please don’t be unduly concerned by her condition, Mr. Rawlins. Memory loss is a fairly common occurrence with some head injury patients.”
Memory loss was another word for amnesia. Just the word made Cal cringe.
“In the majority of cases, it’s temporary. She’ll probably be back to her normal self within twelve hours or so. I just wanted you to be prepared in case you went in to see her and she didn’t recognize you right away.”
Not recognize me?
Cal scoffed at the notion. She might be dazed, but there was no way in this world she wouldn’t know her own husband. They’d been soul mates from the moment they’d met.
Your soul could never forget an integral part of itself, he reasoned inwardly.
“She’s right in there. When you need to talk to me, I’ll be at the front desk.”
Nodding to the doctor Cal headed for the cubicle, his heart revving like a race engine. As he stepped inside the curtain, he couldn’t wait to embrace his wife who’d only been gone from his arms a short while.
He found Diana lying on her right side, facing him. From this angle he couldn’t tell that she’d sustained an injury to the back of her head.
Instead of the leaf-green shirtwaist dress which had molded her gorgeous figure earlier, she was wearing a hospital gown and appeared to be asleep. Her shoulder-length hair fanned out on the pillow, exactly as she’d worn it when she’d gotten ready for work.
Except for the smudges beneath her eyes where the dark lashes rested against her pale cheeks, she looked vulnerable as hell, but perfectly normal to him. Thank God.
Hopefully he’d be able to take her home within the next couple of hours.
One arm lay on top of the sheet covering her body. He leaned over to examine her elbow with his fingertip. The skin around the bandage showed definite signs of having been scraped. At the slight contact, her lips made an unfamiliar moue, then her eyelids fluttered open.
“Diana?” he cried in relief to see she was awake. In an instinctive move, he covered her mouth with his own, needing a repeat demonstration of the physical love they’d shared that morning before she’d left the house.
When she wouldn’t allow him to deepen their kiss, he tried gently to coax her lips apart to provoke the response he craved.
“No—” she begged in alarm. “Please don’t.” She pushed her free hand against his shoulder.
Never once in their lives had she rejected him. Bewildered by her behavior, he raised his head to look down at her. The green eyes staring back at him showed no sign of recognition. Only anxiety.
Lord.
She really doesn’t know who I arm.
That’s impossible!
“Diana, it’s me, Cal. Your husband. For the love of God, darling—Say something!”
He waited for her to cry out the words he needed to hear.
“I’m sorry,” she finally whispered, “but I have no idea who you are. Can I please talk to the doctor?”
Terror seized Cal’s heart so that he was slow to hear her plea.
The tall, broad-shouldered stranger at her bedside had just announced he was her husband, Cal. He’d called her Diana, and he’d kissed her with the ease of longtime familiarity.
Since she’d been brought in to emergency, Dr. Farr had referred to her as Mrs. Rawlins. Apparently she had no family other than her husband who would be arriving at the hospital shortly.
She studied the man whose brown hair matched the color of his pain-filled eyes. He reminded her of those men on horseback she’d seen in magazine ads depicting the West, rugged individualists with hardboned faces and chiseled features. Yet this man was dressed in a light brown business suit and tie, cloaking him in a mantle of urbane sophistication.
He looked successful, confident. Very much a master of his own destiny. She couldn’t imagine being married to someone who appeared so dominant and male.
Perspiration leaked from every pore of her body. She moaned in panic because she was unable to recall anything before they’d brought her and the baby into the emergency room.
The torment coming from the stranger’s eyes made her feel uncomfortable, and guilty, because she couldn’t do anything to alleviate it.
Her gaze slid away to focus on the large, breathtaking diamond of her engagement ring. It, plus a wide gold wedding band on the ring finger of her left hand, attested to the fact that she’d been through the process of an engagement and marriage to him. They’d had a child together.
The baby!
Right now she needed Tyler desperately.
Why hadn’t someone brought him back to her yet? The emergency room doctor had assured her that her little boy was all right, so what could be taking so long?
Wishing the man who claimed to be her husband would go away, she asked, “Could you do me a favor, please?”
“You know I’d do anything for you, darling,” came his husky response at last. “What is it?”
He’d been hovering over her. Combined with his loving attitude, she felt smothered and wished he would go away. “Would you please find Tyler and bring him to me?”
“Tyler?”
“My baby!” she blurted, not understanding why his voice had sounded so strange just now. But the strain of trying to get through to him had started up the horrible throbbing at the back of her skull once more. Nausea washed over her in waves.
“I just want Tyler,” she half sobbed. Tears poured down her cheeks. “They said he wasn’t injured in the fall, but maybe the pediatrician has found something wrong after all.”
His lips brushed her moist cheek. “I’ll be right back, my love.”
After he left the room, she breathed more easily. If he touched her again or used more any more endearments, she would ask the nurse to tell him to stay away.
Hurt because she’d winced when he’d kissed her, Cal wheeled out of the cubicle and made a beeline for Dr. Farr who was filling out a chart. At his approach, the doctor looked up.
“How is your wife? Did she recognize you?”
“Not yet.” He expelled the breath he’d been holding. “But she referred to the baby as Tyler, which is a step in the right direction.” Cal then proceeded to explain the significance of the name.
The other man gave him an encouraging smile. “No doubt about it. Her memory is returning. I’m sure Dr. Harkness will agree. Too bad something has held him up. I’ll make another inquiry and send him to you as soon as he comes into emergency.”
“I would appreciate that. However, there’s another problem. Diana’s worried about the baby and wants to see him to make sure he’s all right. After what I’ve told you about her last miscarriage, I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
“I understand where you’re coming from, Mr. Rawlins. You don’t want her to get unduly attached to a baby that isn’t hers. On the other hand, I’d like to decrease any anxiety she’s feeling right now. If seeing the baby will bring her momentary comfort, that might be the best medicine to hasten the initial healing process.”
In his heart of hearts Cal knew that for the time being, the baby was the only thing that would console his wife. The fact that she didn’t need or want him, her own husband, cut deeper than a knife. But he realized he had to put her desires ahead of his own.
“How old is the infant?”
“I estimate three, maybe four days.”
So young!
A shudder passed through Cal’s body. His wife would find a virtual newborn irresistible.
Diana, darling—Where did the baby come from? What were you doing with it? Lord, what a nightmare.
“Could you ask someone to bring the baby down to her?”
“It could be under the lights for a while. But I’ll find out what I can and keep you posted. In the meantime, go back to your wife and see if your conversation jars her memory a little more.”
He nodded. But first he needed to get hold of Roman.
Someone’s baby was missing.
If Diana couldn’t shed any light on the situation within the next little while, this could become a police matter. Roman would know exactly how to handle it and be discreet at the same time.
Cal didn’t think for a minute that his wife had gone off the deep end, and had stolen the baby. But whatever the explanation, when she regained her full memory she would be loathe to give it up.
This accident had happened too soon after her last miscarriage. More than ever he felt it vital to go ahead and start adoption proceedings.
Needing privacy, he found the empty examination room and called his friend on his cellular phone.
“Roman, here.”
“Roman? It’s Cal.”
“Hey! I’m glad you called. I was just telling Brittany the four of us need to get together this weekend. By the way, where’s the best assistant I’ve ever had? She told me she was going to come in early to catch up on some paperwork.”
“That’s what I’m calling about. Lord, Roman. I’m at Bonneville Regional. Diana’s in the emergency room with a head injury.”
“What?”
Cal’s eyes closed tightly. He was too broken up to talk.
“Say no more. I’ll be right there.”
“Thanks,”’ Cal said in a hoarse whisper, and put the phone back in his pocket. Right now he needed his buddy to help make sense of this nightmare. “Thank God for Roman,” he murmured, hurrying to Diana’s cubicle.
By this time another doctor was examining her, asking her questions. Cal figured it was Dr. Harkness. With eye signals the neurosurgeon indicated he wanted to be alone with his patient and would talk to Cal later.
He fought the desire to inform the doctor that he was Diana’s husband, that he wanted to be involved. However Dr. Harkness had left him with no choice but to return to the reception area.
Since the examination might take some time, Cal decided to go outside and wait for Roman. He needed to fill his lungs with fresh air that wasn’t tainted by the smell of antiseptic. On the way out, he asked someone to show him where his wife had fallen.
One of the ambulance attendants accompanied him to the spot, but any sign of an accident had been cleaned up.
“Did anyone see her fall?”
“Not that I know of, sir. We went out when an ambulance drove in and noticed her sitting on the path. Her pupils were dilated. She couldn’t tell us any information, so we brought her inside.”
“Okay. Thanks.”
Without wasting another second he strode swiftly toward her parked car. She’d left the doors unlocked, something she normally never did for safety reasons. It meant she was in such a hurry to get inside the emergency room, she didn’t bother.
Suddenly his eye caught sight of a rectangular carton in the back seat. It was the kind of box that held produce meant for a grocery store. With a jerk, he opened the back door and reached for the box. The empty carton had been lined with a thin, wrinkled cotton blanket.
Dear Lord. Had she found the baby in this box?
“Cal?” a familiar male voice called out.
Cal whirled around to see Roman standing there. He must have flown from his office to make it here this fast.
“What’s going on?”
After emitting a tortured sigh, Cal told his friend everything he knew. “The hell of it is, she didn’t recognize me, Roman.”
He felt a clap on his shoulder. “When I was on the police force, I investigated a lot of accidents and saw plenty of cases like this. Her amnesia is temporary.”
Cal shivered again. “You can’t imagine what it’s like to kiss your wife, look into her eyes, only to see fear and repulsion there.”
“No, I can’t. But she only fell a couple of hours ago. Give it time for her mind and body to absorb the shock. It won’t be long before she’s back to normal. Meanwhile, let’s see if there’s anything else in the car that will give us a clue as to what happened.”
Roman’s was the voice of sanity. Together they searched the immaculate interior, but found nothing else.
“Have you looked in her purse or her clothes?”
“No,” Cal answered in a hoarse voice. “Her reaction to me left me too shaken up to think, period.”
“I hear you. Let’s go inside the hospital and see if we can find anything else that will shed some light.”
Cal nodded before the two of them went back to the emergency room. Dr. Harkness met them at the desk.
After exchanging the amenities he said, “I concur with the attending physician’s diagnosis. She’s suffering the kind of amnesia brought on by head trauma.
“There’s been no loss of knowledge of the things around her. For example, she knows she’s in a hospital, she can tell time, add numbers, all of those details. But for now she has blocked out past events. In time, she’ll recover her memory.”
“How soon, Doctor?”
“No one has the answer to that question. You just have to be patient. My advice is to feed her information on a need-to-know basis only. Her mind is refusing to let her remember, possibly because she doesn’t want to remember.” One blond brow lifted. “Has something happened recently that has been very painful for her?”
Cal started to nod. “She’s had three miscarriages in a row. The most recent one dealt us both a severe blow. Since then, Diana has been obsessed by the idea that she might not be able to conceive again, let alone have a child. She’s wanted a baby ever since we were married.”
“That could explain the reason why it might take longer for her to get her memory back, Mr. Rawlins. Dr. Farr tells me the baby she was holding isn’t yours, that you have no idea whose it is.”
“None at all. Roman, here, is the head of the Lufka detective agency. He’s going to start an investigation to find out whose baby it is, and why Diana happened to have the baby with her.”
The doctor’s expression sobered. “That’s good. But as you’ve realized by now, she believes the baby is hers.”
“Yes. That’s what’s got me worried."
“I confess I don’t like it, either. Dr. Farr told me you would rather she didn’t see the baby again. I tend to agree with you, yet I also feel that the other doctor has a point. The baby would be good for her right now to comfort her in her fear. She’s very frightened that she can’t remember anything about her life with you. She’s clinging to that child because she needs something to love that is familiar to her.”
“What should I do?”
“For the time being, the baby has jaundice and can’t be moved from the lights until the pediatrician gives the go ahead. I’ve told your wife about his condition. She seems to have accepted the fact that she’ll have to wait until he’s improved before she’s allowed to see him.
“Thankfully the baby’s condition, which is not life threatening now that he’s being given the proper care, has bought us some time. We can hope that as you stay with your wife, keep her company and anticipate her needs, she’ll start to remember things on her own. The memory usually comes back in bits and pieces with little effort.”
“Except that she’s repulsed by my presence,” Cal ground out.
“She told me she’s afraid of you. That’s why I didn’t invite you to stay for the examination. It’s a natural reaction. She has to go on blind faith that you are her husband, that you two love each other and have been happily married. To her, you’re a complete stranger.
“I’m going to have her admitted overnight for observation. In the morning, if all her vital signs are stable, and another X ray doesn’t show any problems, I’ll let you take her home.
“For the time being, my advice for what it’s worth is to treat her like a sister rather than a wife. Slowly but surely allow friends and relatives to come around, but warn them not to upset her or act startled by her loss of memory. Always be supportive, friendly, tender, kind. Don’t overreact when she retreats. She’s only protecting herself. Don’t make physical advances.”
Cal shook his head. “I already did when I kissed her and she didn’t kiss me back.” The pain of her rejection had gone soul deep.
“A perfectly natural gesture on your part, but it explains her anxiety. Until her memory returns, she has to regain her trust of you. I’m afraid the burden is on your shoulders, Mr. Rawlins. However I want to assure you that I believe her condition is temporary. In time you’ll have her back as good as new.”
He turned to Roman. “We’ve had to report Baby Doe to the police, but perhaps your investigation will produce swifter results. Let us know, will you?”
“Of course. I’m hoping to have answers within a few hours.”
“Good. Then I’ll talk to both of you later. The hospital will keep me notified if there are changes in your wife’s condition. If you have any concerns at all, feel free to ask someone at the desk to phone me.”
“Thank you, Dr. Harkness.”
He smiled. “She’s a lovely woman. I can understand your fear. This is the time when the wedding vows start to take on a whole new meaning.”
Cal pondered the doctor’s words. He knew the other man was trying to commiserate, but could anyone understand a situation like this unless they had experienced it for themselves?
“You all right, Cal?”
The concern in Roman’s voice jerked him back to the present.
“No, but I’m going to have to be, aren’t I?”
The rhetorical question required no response. Roman shifted his weight. “After listening to Dr. Harkness, I think it would be better if I don’t see Diana until tomorrow or even the next day. One person at a time. It makes sense to me.
“What I want you to do is ask an attendant to bring her belongings out here. Tell them to make up any excuse they want so they won’t alarm her unduly. I might find a clue. It’s the first place I need to start. Then I’m going back to the office. Maybe she left some kind of clue there which I didn’t see at the time.
“We know she was on her way to work this morning and made no mention of tending anyone’s baby. So it’s my guess the baby was either placed in her car or—”
“Or placed on the doorstep at work!” Cal blurted. “If it had been on our doorstep or in our car when she left the garage, she would have run in the house to tell me.”
“Unless it was still kind of dark and she didn’t notice it on the back seat until she got to work.”
“That’s a possibility, except that she almost always locks the car doors. Someone would have had to force entry to even get in the garage.”
“Whatever, following this to its logical conclusion, if the baby looked yellow to her, she might have been so concerned, she didn’t think to call anyone. Instead she felt it was an emergency and immediately drove to the hospital figuring an ambulance couldn’t get there any faster. Obviously in her haste, she slipped and fell.”
“That’s it, Roman! That has to be the explanation.”
“As soon as you can, get me her things, and I mean everything, we should have answers before long.”
“I owe you for this, Roman.”
“Then we’re more than even. I can’t count the times you’ve come to my rescue, especially when I was working on Brittany’s case. You and Diana helped me keep my sanity before I made her my wife. Now it’s my turn to help you. I’ve never made it any secret that I love Diana. So do the other PI’s. She’s the best thing that ever happened to the agency. When the guys hear what happened, it’s going to come as a horrible shock, particularly to Brittany and Annabelle.”
“I know. Those three have grown as close as sistets.”
“I’ll inform everybody. You go back to Diana and let us handle the investigation.”
Cal put a hand on Roman’s shoulder. “Wait here just a minute. I’ll get someone to bring out her things.” He found an attendant nearby and told her what they needed from Diana’s cubicle.
“No problem. The doctor has just given orders to take her up to a private room on the fourth floor, 418 North. I’ll just tell her we’re going to load her stuff on a cart first.”
“Perfect.”
In short order the attendant came back with a large sack provided by the hospital containing Diana’s personal effects. Cal handed it over to Roman. “I hope you find something. For Diana’s own good, the sooner the mystery about the baby is cleared up, the better.”
“Don’t worry. We’ll be fast and thorough. I’m going out to her car for the box and blanket. One of the guys will be by later to drive the car back to your house. In the meantime, as soon as I discover anything, I’ll phone you on your cellular.”
Cal nodded. He couldn’t ask for more than that. Right now as he stared at Roman’s departing back, he realized his friend’s level-headed thinking was the only thing keeping him from going right over the edge.
CHAPTER TWO
“NURSE?”
“Yes, Mrs. Rawlins?”
“Could you call me Diana, please?”
“Of course. If you’ll call me Jane.”
“All right. Jane? I overheard Dr. Fair say my baby is four days old. I don’t understand why I’m not sore and bleeding after my delivery. Why hasn’t my milk come in yet?”
“That’s something to ask the doctor when be makes his rounds this evening. Don’t worry. The baby is being well taken care of in the nursery.”
“How soon can I see him?”
“He needs to stay under the lights until tomorrow, at least.”
“Then will you help me to go to the nursery so I can sit with him?”
“That’s against doctor’s orders, Diana. We’ve just settled you in your room. He left strict instructions for you to have rest and stay quiet. You want to get better, don’t you?
“Your husband has gone home to bring you some of your things. When he returns, you can talk to him about it. But if you can wait until this evening, Dr. Harkness will make his rounds. Perhaps he’ll allow you and your husband to go to the nursery for a peek. Everything depends on how you and the baby are feeling by then.”
“You don’t understand, Jane. I don’t remember him being my husband- All I want is my baby!”
“I know. But you want him to get better, too, don’t . you?”
“Of course.”
“Then try to be patient. I know it’s hard. After that nasty fall, you need to give yourself a chance to heal. I’d also like to see that temperature go down. Tell you what I’ll look in on you again in a little while.”
“Don’t go!”
The nurse walked over to the side of the bed. “What’s frightening you the most?”
Diana hid her face in her hands. “I don’t know. Everything.”
“Of course it is. If I couldn’t remember anything of my past life, I’d be frightened, too. But this is a temporary situation. You remember having the baby with you when you fell. That means your memory is returning. Just give it a little more time.”
She lifted her tear-drenched face. “That’s true, isn’t it? I remembered his name was Tyler.”
“That’s right. And you’ll start remembering more and more.”
“But that’s just it! I don’t remember anything else. Mr. Rawlins acts so hurt around me, I can hardly bear it.”
“Naturally he has been affected by your fall. He says everything was wonderful between you when you left for work this morning, and then he gets a call saying that you’re in the hospital and can’t remember what happened.”
“My work?” she blurted, scarcely listening to anything else. What kind of work?
This was another revelation she couldn’t fathom because she had no memory of it. Why would she be going to work when she’d just had a baby?
“That’s what I understand,” Jane informed her, “but I’ll leave that to your husband to explain. He should be back soon. I must say he loves you very much. It’s obvious to the staff that he would do anything for you.”
“I don’t want his solicitation.”
“Maybe not, but if you could put yourself in his place for a moment, you would understand-that he is as frightened as you are.”
“What does he have to be frightened about? He knows me.”
“That’s true, but he’s married to a woman who doesn’t know him. You’re treating him like you would anyone off the street because you can’t do anything else. How do you suppose you would feel if your positions were reversed and he wanted nothing to do with you?”
Diana bit her lip and turned her head toward the wall. The movement hurt the spot on the back of her head where they’d bandaged it. She didn’t like Jane reminding her that Cal Rawlins was in pain.
“If you want company, I’ll send one of the volunteers down to read to you or whatever you’d like.”
“No. I think I want to be alone now.”
“I’ll check on another couple of patients, then come back.”
“Thank you.” She fought more tears. “I’m sorry I’m behaving so abominably.”
“The fact that you can apologize for something that is beyond your control tells me that at heart you’re a very kind, sensitive woman who wouldn’t purposely hurt anyone.”
But am I? How does Jane know that?
When the door was shut, Diana reached under the bedsheet to feel her stomach. It was flat and smooth as silk. There were no pads covering a sore incision, which meant she hadn’t had a Cesarean section.
While she lay there, it came to her that she hadn’t given birth to her baby. She couldn’t have, or there would be all the normal signs!
Had she adopted it?
Nobody had said a word about anything.
Dear God. What was really going on?
For the first time since coming into the hospital, she was anxious to talk to Mr. Rawlins. He appeared to be the only person who could give her the answers she needed.
But would he be honest with her? How could she trust a perfect stranger?
Cal had barely entered his house to pack a bag for Diana when his cellular phone rang. He reached in his pocket and put it to his ear.
“Roman? I saw your name on the Caller ID.”
“I told you I’d touch base when I had something. You and I were right on.”
He gripped the phone tighter. “Go ahead. I’m listening.”
“I found a note tucked in the pocket of Diana’s dress, the one folded in the hospital bag. The paper has been ripped from a steno pad. The typed message reads,
“Dear Diana,
My boyfriend and I talked it over and decided we had to give up the baby because we can’t take care of it. A friend told me about you and how much you’ve been wanting one, so I brought him to your work. She says that you and your husband are the nicest people in the world, and that you would make the perfect parents. She also said you have a nursery all ready for a baby boy, and I want my boy to have the best of everything, so I’m giving him to you and nobody else. I’ve asked God if I’m doing the right thing and I feel really good inside about this. Please take care of him and love him. I wish we could, but we can’t. I’ll ask one more favor. Please take him to church so he can learn about God. I always liked church and I know that if you do that for him, the three of you will have a perfect life. Thank you very much. And one more favor. When he gets older, tell him we loved him too much to try and keep him.”
The simplicity, the poignancy, of the young mother’s words caused tears to prick Cal’s eyes. She loved her baby. It took amazing faith and courage to do what she did. What a hell of a situation. That note must have wrung Diana’s heart.
“Lord, Roman. This is incredible.”
“You can say that again. No doubt Diana’s compassionate instincts took right over. One look at the sick baby and she rushed him to the emergency room for treatment.”
Cal’s mind was leaping ahead. “If Diana were to read that note, it might help bring her memory back faster.”
“I agree. Before I can give it to you, I have to contact the police and let them know what we’ve learned. That note exonerates Diana from any wrongdoing and will be used as evidence.”
Roman had been reading Cal’s mind. Neither man had wanted to say anything earlier, but both knew the circumstances of Diana suddenly claiming a newborn as her own would look suspicious in the eyes of the law, regardless of her head injury.
Filled with relief that at least this much of the mystery was solved, Cal could concentrate fully on Diana. “I’m going back to the hospital in a few minutes and I’ll let them know what we’ve learned.”
“Good. In the meantime I’ll get started tracking down this young mother. She’s given us plenty of information, but I’m not so sure her boyfriend had anything to do with her decision. I wouldn’t be surprised if he disappeared on her a long time ago and she’s trying to save face. Nevertheless she’s friendly with someone who has a connection with the agency, otherwise she couldn’t have known about Diana and her desire for a baby.
“The girl is probably in her midteens. She may not have gone to a hospital for her delivery, but on the chance that she did, I’ll run a check on all the babies delivered within the last week. I’d like to find her. There are programs to help unwed mothers keep their babies.”
“What if she doesn’t turn up?”
“Then the baby will become a ward of the court and placed in foster care until it’s adopted.”
Adopted.
“What if—”
“I’m way ahead of you Cal. That’s why I want to conduct a thorough search for the baby’s mother. Some mothers regret their decision and come back for their babies, or cause trouble later on down the road.
“In this case the mother knows exactly where to come. The last thing an adoptive couple would want or need is to have the birth mother show up after the legal proceedings were concluded. But we’re getting way ahead of ourselves here, and I can’t guarantee anything.”
“I realize that. But if anyone can do the impossible, it’s you. Roman?” Cal’s voice was gruff with emotion. “I can’t thank you enough for being there.”
“Save it. Get back to your wife. We’ll stay in touch.”
“Right.”
A few minutes later Cal drove to the hospital with some clothes and personal articles for Diana, including their wedding photo album and another scrapbook. Hoping to jog her memory, he also brought the novel she’d been reading. When he saw that the mail had been delivered, he took that along, too, bills and all. The latest issue of Detective Inc, had come. She always went for that magazine first because she wanted to keep up to date and be the best assistant possible to Roman.
Enroute to the hospital Cal made another call to his private secretary, Mrs. West. After updating her on Diana’s condition, he informed her that he would be out of the office for several days. If something came up she couldn’t handle, she could reach him on his cellular.
With that taken care of, he pulled into the car park and dashed inside the hospital, praying that Diana had started to remember something else besides the baby. That she remembered him.
His first instinct was to open the door to her room and go in unannounced. But the doctor had cautioned him to treat her like a sister, so he knocked.
“Yes?”
“Diana? It’s Cal. Is it all right if I come in?”
“Give me a minute, please.”
The old Diana wouldn’t have needed a knock. She would never have kept him waiting. His Diana of six hours ago would have welcomed him with open arms, no matter her condition.
His jaw hardened because he realized the miracle he’d been waiting for hadn’t happened yet.
“Of course. Take all the time you need.”
It seemed an eternity before she said, “You can come in now.”
Cal entered her room and closed the door behind him. He felt like an intruder.
Dear God. She was his wife. How was he going to handle being around her and not touching her, holding her?
He still couldn’t fathom that any of this had happened—that she was sitting primly in the hospital bed, the covers up to her chin, looking fragile and so damn nervous of him he felt like someone had just slugged him in the midsection.
“I brought you several changes of clothes and a few things to read.”
Her meek little thank-you sparked another surge of adrenaline. When she didn’t extend her hands, he left the things he’d brought on her bedside table.
Needing to channel his negative energy, he hung up a couple of items in the closet, then put the rest of her clothes away in the drawers.
“How are you feeling now?” he asked, pulling up a chair to the side of her bed.
“I still don’t remember anything, if that’s what you’re asking.” She said this with her head lowered. He had the idea she couldn’t stand to look at him. “I’m sorry if that brings you pain.”
Her blunt speaking took his breath. Diana had always been an honest person, but normally she was more gentle in her approach. The doctor had told him to treat her like a family member, but he’d never had a sister or brother and couldn’t pretend something he didn’t feel. He had a premonition that under these precarious circumstances, finding common ground would prove virtually impossible. There were no guidelines. He would have to feel his way.
“I could lie and say I was only inquiring about the physical pain to the back of your head. The truth is, I’m shattered by what has happened to you, to me. To us. Any way you look at it, this is a hellish situation. If we’re not totally honest with each other, then I don’t see how we’ll be able to work our way out of this nightmare. I realize you’re terrified of me.”
That brought her head up. She stared at him. Again, he could see his presence didn’t register with her except to upset her.
“I am, but not because you’re a terrifying person. I’m sure you’re probably a wonderful person,” she admitted in a quiet voice. “But I don’t know you. I have no feeling for you. That’s what is terrifying.”
Oh, Lord.
“I’m beginning to realize that. Just give me some time to deal with it.”
“Of course.” He heard a troubled sigh escape. “The only thing real to me is the baby. Obviously I didn’t give birth to him.”
He blinked in surprise. “Who told you that?”
“Why would I have to be told something that is vastly apparent? I overheard the doctor say that the baby is only four days old, and I show no signs of ever having been pregnant. Which means we adopted him. Couldn’t I have children, or was it a physical problem on your part?”
Give your wife information on a need-to-know basis.
Unable to remain seated, he got up and wandered over to the window which looked out on the foothills of the city. Was this one of those moments?
“Why aren’t you saying anything? Is it because before the accident, I couldn’t handle the fact that I wasn’t able to conceive, or something like that, and you’re afraid to bring it up to me now?”
Diana, Diana...
“Since I have no idea of how I used to be, it really doesn’t matter, does it?”
It did once, my darling. You wouldn’t even discuss the possibility of adoption.
“I thought you were going to be honest with me.”
“I want to be.” His voice grated.
“So why the hesitation?”
He rubbed the back of his neck before turning from the window to look at her. “Because I don’t want to upset you. What I’m about to tell you could do just that. I would rather have waited for your memory to return, then no explanation would be necessary.”
She laced her hands together nervously. “But we don’t know when that day will come. If ever.”
“Don’t say that!” Her words filled him with fresh anguish.
“I have to. Some people lose their memories and never regain them.”
Dear God. You can remember everything about life except your own life! It doesn’t make any sense.
“Dr. Harkness says your memory will return.” Cal had to believe that or lose his mind.
“Maybe. In the meantime, do you expect me to live in a vacuum?” she blurted. “I’d rather be dead.”
Cal groaned. “Never talk that way again, Diana. Not even in jest.”
“You’re not inside my skin.”
My wife—Where have you gone? I don’t know you like this.
He swallowed hard. “No. I’m not. I couldn’t begin to understand how you feel.”
“Thank you for saying that.” Her voice wobbled.
He wanted to wrap her in his arms and will her memory back, but he couldn’t do anything. Not one damn thing. He’d never felt so helpless in his life.
“Please—if you care for me at all, tell me the truth.”
“All right.” He placed his hands on the back of the chair. “That baby upstairs is not our baby.”
“What? But of course it is! It’s Tyler!”
“No, Diana. You say you want to hear the truth, but already you’re fighting me.”
An awkward silence prevailed. “D-did we fight a lot in our marriage?”
He swallowed hard. “Never.”
After a long silence she whispered, “I’m sorry. Please go on.”
His heart reacted like a runaway train. “I don’t know if this is a good idea. Why don’t we wait for the doctor?”
She shook her head. “Don’t do this to me. Finish telling me the truth. I have to hear it. I promise I won’t interrupt again.”
I’m damned whatever I do, aren’t I, sweetheart?
“We’re pretty sure you found him on the doorstep at your work this morning. He was lying in a grocery box. There was a note. The unwed mother who left the baby there knew you would discover him. When you saw that the baby was jaundiced, you immediately brought him to the hospital for care.
“On your way into the emergency room, you slipped and hit your head on the pavement. Some ambulance attendants found you sitting on the cement, holding him. That’s why they brought you inside. When you couldn’t remember anything, they looked in your purse, found your identification and called me.”
Her lustrous green eyes filled with tears. “Tyler’s really not my baby,” she murmured in agony.
What have I said, what have I done?
Go on, Rawlins. Finish it.
“No. An abandoned baby is a ward of the court. You called him Tyler because that was your grandfather’s name. It’s the name you had hoped to call our baby, the one you miscarried a few months ago.”
“I had a miscarriage?”
He nodded. “You’ve had three, the last one after you were four months along,” he said gently.
“Nol ” Her look of horror mixed with a hint of pleading tore him apart.
“You asked for the truth. I didn’t want to hurt you. God knows I didn’t.”
Tears gushed from her eyes, forming rivulets down her pale cheeks. Suddenly she was convulsed. Her despair was worse than anything he’d heard during the traumatic week following her last miscarriage when she’d cried nonstop for days.
“Darli—”
“Don’t call me that!” she broke in on him. “For the love of heaven. Just go away and leave me alone.”
Sick in a way he couldn’t describe, Cal left her bedside and headed out of the room for the nursing station. The nurse who’d settled Diana in was just coming down the hall.
“What’s wrong, Mr. Rawlins? You look ill.”
Cal groaned in response. He ran a shaky hand through his hair. Clearing his throat he said, “Diana figured out she didn’t give birth to the baby upstairs in the nursery, so she forced me to tell her the truth. Now she’s inconsolable and it’s my fault.” His voice shook. “My wife needs help!”
The nurse eyed him with compassion. “I know this is hard on you. While I call Dr. Harkness, why don’t you take a seat in the waiting room around the corner. I’ll find you as soon as I’ve talked to him:”
Cal nodded.
Like the shell-shocked victim of a bombing, he made his way to the lounge, trying to grasp the enormity of what had happened since his wife had left his bed earlier that morning.
“Cal?”
At the sound of a familiar female voice he turned in time to see Annabelle—one of their best friends, and a crack member of Roman’s PI team—come rushing toward him.
“Roman just told me what happened. I got here as soon as I could.”
Little as she was, her physical and emotional support was exactly what he needed right now. They reached for each other. The contact caused him to break down. In a rush of emotion everything spilled out, particularly his fears.
“Diana not only sees me as a stranger, Annie, she despises me. What if she never regains her memory? What if she has gone away from me forever?”
“Don’t think like that,” she urged him. “Roman told me the doctor said her condition was temporary.”
Cal grimaced. “But what if he’s wrong? I don’t know why, but I have this gut instinct she’s never going to remember me or our marriage.”
Annabelle’s arms tightened. “You’re getting way ahead of yourself. But if—and I say that’s a huge if—the day should come that you discover her amnesia is permanent, then I know you’ll find a way to make her fall in love with you all over again.”
Her words seeped into his soul.
If Diana’s amnesia is permanent, I know you’ll find a way to make her fall in love with you all over again.
Haunted by such a daunting prospect, he shook his head. “If you had heard the enmity in her voice when she told me to get out of her room a few minutes ago, you wouldn’t be saying that to me now.”
Annabelle let go of him and lifted her head, giving him a direct stare. “It’s too soon to talk about the what-ifs, Cal. Give it a few days. She has withstood a severe head trauma. The pain must be pretty bad. Naturally she’s not herself. Whatever she says or does right now, don’t take it personally.”
“How can I not? The doctor says that if there are no complications, she can be released from the hospital tomorrow. What if she refuses to go home with me?”
“No one can answer that question yet. Let’s wait and see what he has to say about her condition the next time he examines her. As for you, you’re coming to our house tonight Rand told me to tell you that’s an order.”
“Thanks, Annie. I appreciate that, but I couldn’t go anywhere. I’m staying here in case she remembers something and needs me.”
“Then we’ll keep the vigil with you.”
“I couldn’t ask you to do that.”
“You didn’t ask. I’m offering. Don’t forget. My husband and I love Diana, too. Wait here while I go say hello to her. Maybe she’ll refuse to talk to me, maybe she won’t. But since you were honest with her about the baby, then there are no secrets and I won’t have to tiptoe around her. I think it’s important that she knows she has friends she can count on, even if we are strangers to her.”
“I agree. Thanks, Annie,” he whispered.
She raised up to kiss his cheek. “No thanks necessary. I won’t be long. In the meantime, sit down and drink this.” She put some change in the pop machine and handed him a cola. “You probably didn’t eat breakfast.”
“No.”
“Rand will be here shortly. I’ll ask him to bring food for all of us.”
Like Roman, Annabelle kept a level head under stress, providing temporary calm to Cal’s tortured thoughts. He found himself praying that her appearance might trigger the mechanism that propelled Diana back to the world the rest of them inhabited. But deep inside, a part of him still feared her condition was irreversible.
How was he going to live with that?
CHAPTER THREE
“DIANA? It’s Annabelle Dunbarton. I know you don’t know me from Adam, but before the accident we were best friends. May I come in for a minute?”
Diana was lying on her stomach, her face buried in the pillow where she’d been sobbing. At the sound of the stranger’s voice she felt relief that it wasn’t Cal Rawlins. Just minutes earlier Jane had promised to keep him away until after the doctor had come down to examine her again.
Dr. Harkness couldn’t arrive soon enough for her. She didn’t care if the baby wasn’t hers. She wanted to go up to the nursery and see him. In order to do that, she would need the doctor’s permission.
Slowly she raised up enough to notice a smallboned yet curvaceous woman with a beautiful face and stylish cap of short red curls standing in the doorway of her hospital room.
One of my best friends? Another unfamiliar face.
“Yes. Of course. Come all the way in.”
She wiped her eyes with the bedsheet and sat up while the other woman approached.
“I’ve been out in the lounge with Cal.”
“I—I don’t want to see him right now.”
“He told me. Don’t worry. He didn’t send me in here, and he certainly won’t do anything you don’t want him to do. He loves you too much to alienate you.”
“I wouldn’t hurt him purposely, but he means nothing to me. It’s hard having him around because I know he’s in pain.”
“He said as much, and he’s attempting to deal with it. I also realize I don’t mean anything to you, either, but there are many people who love and care about you and Cal. You and I were colleagues as well as confidantes. In time you’re going to want to talk to someone. You’ll have a lot of questions to ask. I want you to know I’ll be here for you when that time comes.
“I’m going to leave my business card with you. I’ve written my cellular phone number on the other side so you can reach me day or night.”
Diana took the card from the other woman’s fingers and read:
Annabelle Dunbarton, Private Detective
LFK Associates International
1406 Foothill Parkway
Salt Lake City, Utah
Diana blinked and looked up at Annabelle. “You say we are colleagues?”
“Yes.”
“You mean, I’m a private detective, too?” Diana couldn’t imagine it, couldn’t comprehend it
“No. You are the glue that holds the whole place together. Roman Lufka is the boss. You’re his assistant and right hand. In fact you’re the one who screens all the calls that come in. Roman relies on your instincts to help decide which cases to take.”
My instincts?
“There are twelve PI’s, but you and I are the only two females on the premises. According to Roman, the agency would fall apart without us. You know the old cliché—ask a woman to get a man’s job done?” Her cat’s eyes smiled. “Anyway, Roman wants you back as soon as possible.
“By the way, he’s gorgeous. I mean drop-dead-handsome gorgeous and very married to Brittany, another best friend of both of ours. They have a little boy, Yuri, named after Roman’s brother, also another close and dear friend. You and I dote on little Yuri because we both want a baby so badly.”
Diana clutched the sheet in her fist. “Cal said I’ve had three miscarriages.”
“Yes, you have. At least you’ve been able to conceive, and your obstetrician told you that the next time you get pregnant, he’s going to sew you up to keep the baby snug inside the full nine months. Cal’s a pretty spectacular specimen of gorgeous himself, so you shouldn’t have any problems there.”
At the thought of intimacy with the man who claimed to be her husband, Diana shivered, partly from fear, partly from some emotion she couldn’t put a name to.
“So far I’ve been out of luck in the conception department, but of course we haven’t been married very long and I’ll never give up. When you meet my husband, Rand, you’ll see why. He’s another version of male gorgeous. Huge. Kind of looks like a lineman for the Green Bay Packers even though he’s a computer wizard. It was a case of opposites attracting. When he kisses me, my feet literally don’t touch the ground.”
Diana felt herself starting to relax. She turned on her side and rested the uninjured part of her head against the pillow, enjoying Annabelle’s loquacious personality.
“Your eyelids are fluttering. That means I’ve overstayed my welcome. Get some rest, Diana. Call me if you want or need anything.”
“Thank you, Annabelle. For some reason I’m tired all of a sudden.”
“I’m not surprised. It’s almost four in the afternoon. Time for you to sleep. What always amazes me is how beautiful you look no matter the hour or the situation. It isn’t fair. You’re like a golden-haired princess. Do you know, I always wanted hair like yours.
“Cal said he took one look at you and lost his heart. Apparently you felt the same way about him. The kind of love you two share is rare. Even if he’s a stranger to you now, don’t shut the door on him. It would be the biggest mistake of your life. Cal’s one in a million.”
First the nurse, now this woman was singing Cal Rawlins’s praises.
After kissing her on the forehead, Annabelle left the room. An odd silence remained following her departure. She emanated such life and vitality, Diana hadn’t wanted her to go.
But Annabelle’s warning about Cal Rawlins sent another shiver through her body. She didn’t want to think about him just now. She didn’t want to remember the agony in those dark brown eyes when she’d told him to go away and leave her alone.
“Mrs. Rawlins? Your husband was worried about you and asked the nurse to send for me.”
At the sound of the doctor’s voice, Diana opened her eyes. She would have sat up, but Dr. Harkness told her to lie still.
“I’m glad you’re here,” she began as he sat on the edge of the bed and felt for her pulse. Now she could talk to him about the baby.
He felt her forehead. “Your husband told me you now know the truth about the abandoned infant, how you came to bring it to the hospital for treatment. He’s afraid the knowledge has hindered your recovery. You’re probably not aware of this, but he’s having a difficult time forgiving himself.”
“Then he’s suffering needlessly because it’s not his fault, Doctor. I forced him to tell me. The reason I’m so glad you’ve come is because I wanted to get your permission to spend time with the baby. I know he’s not mine, but since his birth mother hasn’t been found, he needs mothering. Let me do it. Please.”
She felt his eyes studying her with grave concern. “That baby is under the legal jurisdiction of the court. A set of foster parents will be taking over the infant’s care as soon as the pediatrician deems him ready to leave the hospital.
“Even if my hands weren’t legally tied, you’re in no condition to take care of a baby, not even your own. A little less than twelve hours ago you received a serious head wound which has temporarily robbed you of your memory. You have pain, you’re running a temperature. As your doctor, I must insist you stay in bed and get the rest you need.
“I’ve arranged for Dr. Beal, a staff psychiatrist, to talk to you and your husband first thing in the morning.”
Diana’s stomach clinched. “I don’t want one.”
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