Читать онлайн книгу «Lone soul» автора Valerie P.

Lone soul
Valerie P.
Living a life of an ordinary girl is difficult. Somehow nobody manages to realize it. If you have straight A’s, they automatically transfer you under the “you-must-do/be-the-best” category. If you fail or struggle sometimes, you owe them a proper explanation, endless sorry's and immediate rectifications. If you feel unwell, no one ever attempts to see through. It all is inherent to them. Does it have to be this way all the time? Should I try to change it? Should I go deeper inside of me and try to identify who I really am and what I want for myself?Should I start to build my own true personality?

Valerie P.
Lone soul

Rule #1: a book must be written in a language of a soul (Introduction)
It is so hard to create something new for the world. Especially when you’re living in 21st century, 21 centuries after our lord. But each time you see some kind of art in your hands or in front of your eyes you realize this particular item is unique. It has no clones or something at least close to this particular item. This particular item is one of a kind.

I have always dreamt of bringing something brand-new into our realm. Something that doesn’t just take a talent and hard work, but also contains a piece of a soul, mine one. I know for sure my soul is voluminous, probably more than anyone else’s I know or even don’t. Because if it was not that big, would I be able to experience such hard, strong feelings? To be that empathetically attached to every person I meet? To mourn for things that aren’t related to me by any means? I don’t think so.

That’s why I desire to share a piece of my soul with people. It’s not a wish, but a need.

My greatest idea of all was a song. Not just one, of course. I think I am really good at songwriting at this point, even though I have never published any of those. But how is it good to post lyrics of a song that people won’t even read with a proper melody? It must be singed. Not any way around. And here a problem appears: my voice isn’t exactly vocal material. I can hear and hit the notes, but the sound of my voice is far from beautiful melodic sound I want it to be. So singing is not my choice, at least not yet.

Second greatest idea visited me at the age of 15. I lit up with the thought of writing my own book. A story that represents my character, my personality, my feelings – my soul. I have had many attempts, but it never actually worked out. Maybe I was not prepared? Or my soul wasn’t considerable enough to be shared yet? I don’t exactly have an answer for this question, well do I really need it? If to be fair, I already have an opportunity to write this book, since you’re reading it at this particular moment, which means my soul has grown to the size of “ready-to-be-shared”. It’s ready, so am I.

First I have wanted it to be a fiction, then I changed my mind and decided to make it a memoir. Now I changed my mind again. I want it to be based on my reality and experience, yet to be filled with fictional scenarios. I want to mix both of my ideas. It feels right.

Yet the story begins, I have to warn you. This book’s author, aka Me, isn’t a native English speaker. That’s why you probably won’t see a variety of clever-used words in this novel as you could notice some grammatical mistakes. Unless it doesn’t bother you, you’re free to keep going.

You probably wonder why I wouldn’t write it in my native language. But I refuse to create a book of my life in a language I don’t feel. Do not take it wrong – I love my country and its language as well, but I don’t feel its structure. And yet I understand English – feel it. It is almost as I experience the waves of its existence. If my soul could speak, I’m pretty sure it would speak English. It is a sizable reason.

*Rule #1: a book must be written in a language of a soul. *

Thank you for finishing my introduction, I couldn’t appreciate it more.

Welcome to the story of my life, told by My Soul.

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