Читать онлайн книгу «Wearing the Rancher′s Ring» автора Stella Bagwell

Wearing the Rancher's Ring
Stella Bagwell
If it weren't for the King…… rancher Clancy Calhoun and Olivia Parsons might be able to convince the world that they just knew each other in passing. But convincing themselves was another matter entirely.Years ago, they had been the whole world to each other – and he’d given her a diamond ring to prove it. Now, ten years later, Olivia is back, and she and Clancy are sure they can be in each other’s company without falling apart – or, worse yet, falling into each other’s arms.Because if the ring goes back on her finger, this time it’s never coming off!


“Why are we here together? Pretending we can start over?”
His hands urged her even closer, and Olivia suddenly hated the thickness of her coat. She wanted to shove away the puffy fabric separating their bodies and crush herself against him.
“Pretending?” he countered. “What makes you think we can’t start over?”
A tiny groan sounded in her throat before she glanced away. “Because I don’t think we ever really ended.”
His head moved from one side to the other in disbelief. “Livvy. Livvy.”
The shortened name was whispered with a longing that tore right through her heart, and before she could ponder or wonder about being safe or sorry, she rose up on her toes and pressed her lips to his.
* * *
Wearing the Rancher’s Ring
Stella Bagwell


www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
STELLA BAGWELL has written more than seventy novels for Mills & Boon. She credits her loyal readers and hopes her stories have brightened their lives in some small way. A cowgirl through and through, she loves to watch old Westerns, and has recently learned how to rope a steer. Her days begin and end helping her husband care for a beloved herd of horses on their little ranch located on the south Texas coast. When she’s not ropin’ and ridin’, you’ll find her at her desk, creating her next tale of love. The couple has a son, who is a high school math teacher and athletic coach. Stella loves to hear from readers and invites them to contact her at stellabagwell@gmail.com (mailto:stellabagwell@gmail.com).
To my sister-in-law, Dorothy Sutmiller, with much love.
Contents
Cover (#ue7f3c190-43d0-5771-ba3c-f3b805cf8723)
Introduction (#uf4605828-54cd-5e06-9365-b24fc73065c8)
Title Page (#ubcfc6b9c-c18b-57e4-875d-1978d8649530)
About the Author (#ue6408da0-9436-5bac-ad7a-18ace354d4a5)
Dedication (#u5e70cca6-d772-5ac1-8c50-fe840a83972a)
Chapter One (#ulink_a57c7320-daf7-5fbc-bbb4-603e505441c1)
Chapter Two (#ulink_febc87ec-c7f1-547b-9146-4ccde1a165a6)
Chapter Three (#ulink_0c7ecbcc-6c76-5ce5-9222-e3f99f579617)
Chapter Four (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Five (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)
Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)
Extract (#litres_trial_promo)
Copyright (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter One (#ulink_f893dd43-7635-511a-a319-5da5b2213226)
Clancy Calhoun paused among the crowded tables of the Grubstake Café and stared at the woman sitting near the back of the crowded room. Could it possibly be her? From where he was standing, he could only see a small portion of her face. But the faint tilt of her head, the nearly black hair that glistened with fiery lights, the way her left hand was subtly punctuating each word, seemed all too familiar.
Why would she be here in Carson City, Nevada?
“Clancy, there’s an empty table at the back.”
The female voice had him glancing away from the woman in question and over to Jessi, a young waitress, who was using a paper menu to direct him to follow her through the throng of breakfast eaters.
When they reached the vacated table, Jessi wiped it clean while Clancy tried to snatch a better view of the woman with the dark hair. Her table was now only a few steps away, but with her back still toward Clancy it was impossible for him to get a clear view.
“Are you eating breakfast this morning, Clancy, or just drinking coffee?” Jessi asked. “Huevos rancheros are the special today and Juanita is cooking, so I promise they’re delicious.”
“That’ll be fine, Jessi. And put some green sauce on them, will you? It’s only the first of September. We have some whacky weather going on. It’s not supposed to be this damned cold outside this morning, so I need something to warm me up.”
“I’ll have the cook put on an extra helping of chili,” the waitress assured him.
Jessi hurried away and Clancy started to take his seat when, from the corner of his eye, he caught sight of the mystery woman turning her head in his direction.
Dear God, it was her!
Olivia Parsons. She’d dwelt in his heart and mind for the past ten years and though he’d tried to drive her out, she’d remained stuck there, like a painful splinter, gouging him each time he tried to take a step away from her memory.
Recognition flashed across her face and she stared for only a moment before turning back to the man who was sharing her table.
Still on his feet, Clancy gripped the back of the chair, while he tried to decide whether to cross the small space to greet her. But he was suddenly relieved of making that decision when she said something to her breakfast partner, then quickly rose to her feet. As she maneuvered herself through the tables to reach him, Clancy felt his heart pumping like a jackhammer.
He’d often wondered how it would feel to see her again and what he might possibly say to her. But now that it was actually happening, he was practically paralyzed, his mind nothing more than a whirl of memories. Even though it had been years since he’d last laid eyes on her, she looked almost the same, except that her features were more mature, her curves more womanly.
“Hello, Clancy. It is you, isn’t it?” she asked.
Her voice was still rich and melodic and the sound shimmered through him like a welcome sun ray.
“Yes, it’s me.” He reached for her hand and she didn’t hesitate to curl her fingers firmly around his. “Hello, Olivia. This is quite a surprise to see you here.”
Surprise? Hell, he thought, it was more like a violent earthquake.
A faint smile crossed her face and it dawned on Clancy that he couldn’t decide what his gaze wanted to concentrate on the most. Her dark hair and tanned skin were a rich, vibrant color, her eyes like a shimmering gray sea. He’d forgotten just how pretty, how downright sexy she’d been, but now that she was standing so close, everything about her was rushing back to him, jolting him with erotic memories.
“I moved here to Carson City a couple of weeks ago,” she explained. “A job transfer.”
His mind whirling with questions, he forced himself to release his hold on her hand. “Job? Here in Carson City?”
“For the Bureau of Land Management. Rangeland—you might remember. I work the Sierra Front field out of the district office here in Carson City.”
She gave him another smile, the polite sort of expression that was a display of manners rather than genuine pleasure. Clancy could only wonder what she was really feeling about seeing him again.
“Yes. I remember your classes revolved around land management,” he said stiffly. They’d met in college while he’d been working to finish his degree in ranch management and she’d been working toward a degree in land management. Apparently, at some point after she’d left him, she’d gone back to college and acquired the degree she’d needed to go to work for the BLM.
“So how have you been?” she asked.
He started to answer but was interrupted as Jessi suddenly showed up with his coffee. As the waitress placed the cup and saucer onto the square wooden table, Clancy gestured to one of the chairs. “I was just about to sit. Would you like to join me?”
She cast a quick glance over her shoulder at the big man she’d been dining with. “Well, for a couple of minutes. Wes is nearly finished with his breakfast.”
Clancy quickly helped her into a chair, then settled in the one kitty-corner to her left.
“Would you like more coffee?” the waitress asked her.
Olivia quickly waved off her offer. “No thanks, I’m all done.”
Jessi shot a speculative glance at Clancy, then moved away to wait on a table full of hungry construction workers.
Trying not to stare at Olivia, he reached for his coffee cup and took a long swig. His mind must have short-circuited, he thought. He shouldn’t have asked her to join him. Anything he could possibly say to her would only rake up things that were best left in the past. Even so, a ton of questions were already forming on his tongue, begging to be released.
“So you don’t live in Idaho anymore,” he stated the obvious. “What about your mother?”
Dark shadows flickered in her gray eyes before her gaze fell to the tabletop. “She fought a long hard battle, but she passed on about eight years ago.”
Arlene Parsons had been the main reason Olivia had left him and her studies at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas. Once she’d learned her mother had been diagnosed with cancer and needed her care, she’d quickly gone back home to Idaho. Clancy had wanted to wait for Olivia until the issue with her mother was resolved. He’d desperately wanted to keep their romance alive, in spite of the distance between them. But she wouldn’t listen to any of his suggestions. She’d cut her ties and told him it would be best for him to forget her and get on with his life. Now, ten years later, he was still trying to do just that.
“I’m sorry,” he said, “I lost my mother, too, about seven years ago. It’s rough.”
Her gaze lifted back to his face and Clancy could see that the news of his mother’s demise had taken her aback somewhat.
“Oh. I’m sorry. Did she go through a long illness, too?”
“No. She suffered a fall. An accident at home.” He tried to smile, but painful memories kept getting in the way. “So what do you think about Carson City?”
“It’s very different from Twin Falls. But I’ll get used to it. Anyway, I’m happy to go wherever my job sends me.”
So the BLM moved her around from time to time, he thought. The idea sent his gaze on a search of her left hand. No ring. But that hardly meant she was unattached. Could be the big guy she’d been having breakfast with was her husband.
And why would you care one way or the other? The woman turned her back on you. She’d found it easy to move on and forget the precious time the two of you had spent together.
Trying to ignore the bitter voice in his head, he asked, “What does your family think about the move?”
Her pink lips pressed together. “I don’t have a family.”
Clancy had never expected to hear that from her. All these years he’d imagined her with a husband and children. “Oh. I figured you probably had a husband and kids by now.”
Something stark and resentful appeared in the depths of her eyes.
“I’ve already tried marriage. It didn’t work.” She suddenly smiled, but the display was just as phony as the one she’d given him moments earlier. “I’ve not been near your family ranch yet, but I’ll be in that area with a field supervisor soon. Do you Calhouns lease any government land? Or do you own it all?”
“We lease a few thousand acres of government land. If you do happen to go over ours, I think you’ll find that we’ve taken extremely good care of it.”
“I’m sure we will.”
The man she’d been sitting with earlier suddenly walked up and stood next to Olivia’s chair. She immediately rose to her feet to join him.
“Wes, do you know Clancy Calhoun?” she asked him.
The man, who appeared to be around Clancy’s age, regarded him closely. “Calhoun? Are you one of the Silver Horn Calhouns?”
Clancy nodded. “Yes. That’s my family’s ranch. I’m the manager.”
“Well, it’s nice to finally meet one of you. I hear a lot of good things about your cattle and horses. I’m Wes Wagoner, I work with Olivia for the BLM,” he explained with a friendly smile. “Since she’s new around town, I’m trying to show her the best places to eat.”
Immediately rising to his feet, Clancy reached to shake the man’s hand. “Nice to meet you, Wes. And you didn’t steer her wrong by coming here to the Grubstake. The food is always good.”
As if on cue, Jessi arrived with a platter filled with enough huevo rancheros and hash browns to feed a crew of men. While the young waitress refilled Clancy’s cup, the other man gestured to his food.
“Don’t let your breakfast get cold,” Wes told him. “We’ve got to be going anyway.”
“Yes. Work is waiting,” Olivia chimed in. “It was nice seeing you again, Clancy.”
Feeling as if the air had suddenly been knocked out of him, he said, “Yeah. You two take care.”
They moved on and Clancy sank into his seat. But instead of picking up his fork and digging into the scrumptious breakfast, he sat there, stupefied and wondering why this morning, of all mornings, he’d had to be here at the Grubstake.
Normally Clancy had breakfast with the rest of his family on the Silver Horn. By now he would’ve already been snug in his office, drinking a second or third cup of coffee and listening to the morning farm and market report. But this morning, he’d agreed to meet a fence contractor here at the Grubstake to talk over a project to rebuild some of the ranch’s cross fences. Never in his wildest imaginings would he have figured on running into Olivia in this busy café. And to learn she was living and working right here in the Carson City area had thrown him for a complete loop.
Did that mean he might see her again? Dear God, he hoped not. He couldn’t go through another five minutes like that. His insides were still trembling and his stomach was clenched into a tight fist. And yet the idea of never seeing her again made him just as sick. Either way, he was equally damned, he thought.
“Is something wrong with the food, Clancy? If it doesn’t taste good, I’ll have Juanita do it over.”
He looked up to see that Jessi had returned to his table and he tried to gather his senses as she tilted a glass coffee carafe over his cup and filled it almost to the brim.
“Nothing is wrong with the food,” he assured her. “It’ll be fine.”
“I’ve seen the big guy in here before,” Jessi commented. “I think his name is Wes. But I don’t remember seeing the woman. Mighty pretty. I noticed she came over and said hello.”
“And I’ve noticed you noticing,” he told the waitress.
She scowled at him. “Well, what’s wrong with that? When I see something out of the ordinary I take a second glance. And it isn’t like you to have a lady at your table.”
“She’s just an old acquaintance, Jessi. Nothing more.”
“Oh. Well, I almost made the mistake of thinking you were human,” she said with a shake of her head.
He shot her a tired look.
Laughing, she touched his shoulder. “Okay, okay. I’ll let up on you. Besides, that darned Ben Harper is motioning for me. Why can’t I have just one morning where I don’t have to see that silly grin of his?”
“Don’t complain, Jessi. He’s clearly human.”
With a good-natured groan, the waitress left and Clancy tried to concentrate on his meal. But instead of seeing the sauce-covered eggs on his plate, he was seeing Olivia’s pretty face.
I’ve already tried marriage. It didn’t work.
Her revelation shouldn’t have surprised him. After all, years had passed since she’d left him during his final year of college. A lot could happen to a person in that length of time. But hearing her say that she’d been married had been like an axe to his back. During their time together, he’d asked her to marry him and she’d accepted. He’d put a diamond on her finger and they’d started to make all sorts of plans for their future together. Then she’d learned about her mother’s illness and suddenly everything that Clancy had hoped and dreamed for was over and finished. She’d gone back to Idaho and clearly forgotten he’d ever meant anything to her.
And that’s what he needed to do now, Clancy thought. Once and for all, he had to forget Olivia Parsons.
* * *
Clancy Calhoun. From the moment Olivia had learned she was being transferred to Carson City, the idea of running into him again had hung like an ominous cloud over her head. She’d tried to convince herself that the probability of it happening was slim to none. But deep down she’d known it was inevitable that someday, somewhere, she’d meet up with him.
From the moment she’d stepped foot in this town more than two weeks ago, she’d found herself looking at faces, searching for a tawny head of hair and a pair of long, strong legs. Yet this morning, of all mornings, she’d not searched the Grubstake Café. Instead, she’d heard a voice behind her. A voice so familiar that her heart had practically stopped.
Oh, Lord, just thinking about the way he’d looked was still making her insides shake. Ten long years had honed his lean features and long body into one rough, tough specimen of a man. Thick, tawny hair had curled around the back of his collar, while beneath the brim of his gray cowboy hat his green eyes had traveled over her with a raw sensuality that had practically taken her breath away.
She’d not dared to ask him if he was married, but a glance at his left hand had shown no evidence of a wedding band. Did that mean he didn’t have a wife now? Had he ever had one?
Damn it, that fact was none of her business, Olivia thought crossly. She’d given up her chance to become Clancy’s wife long ago. Her time with him had been over and done with for ten long years. There wasn’t a glimmer of a chance that a fire could be rekindled from those dead ashes. And she didn’t want to try to start one. Her job was enough to keep her happy.
Through the open door of the office she shared with Wes, she could hear her coworker talking in the outer room with Beatrice, the secretary who kept things in order for Olivia and Wes.
“I got to meet ranching royalty this morning, Bea. And it just so happens that Olivia already knew the man.”
“Oh. Who was that?” Beatrice asked, her voice clearly indicating that she was preoccupied with something on her desk.
“Clancy Calhoun. You know—the Silver Horn ranch. Seems this guy is the manager.”
“A Calhoun! Olivia is acquainted with the Calhoun family? I don’t believe it! She’s only been in town a couple of weeks.”
Olivia cringed as she heard Beatrice’s chair squeak and then the woman’s heels tapping across the tile until they reached the open doorway.
“Olivia, is Wes telling me the truth? You actually know the Calhouns?”
Stifling a groan, Olivia swiveled her chair toward the young secretary. Beatrice wasn’t exactly a gossiper, but Olivia would rather talk about anything besides Clancy.
“Clancy and I were in a few college classes together down at UNLV. That’s all. I hadn’t seen him in years.” She wasn’t about to tell the secretary or Wes that she’d once worn Clancy’s engagement ring. The two would never quit hounding her with questions.
Resting her shoulder against the door frame, the perky blonde smiled impishly. “Hmm. I’ll bet he thought you looked pretty hot.”
“I seriously doubt it.” Even though she was trying to sound bored, she could feel a tinge of heat on her cheeks. “The years have changed both of us.”
“Well, from what I hear only one of the Calhoun boys is married now. Rafe, the foreman. That means Clancy is still eligible.”
Beatrice was only having a bit of fun. The other woman had no idea that Olivia had once loved Clancy very deeply. Leaving him had nearly torn her heart out. And this morning, when she’d spotted him in the busy café, the loss had whammed her so hard she’d hardly been able to think.
“Thanks for the information, Bea. But I’m not interested in finding a husband. I’ve had one of those before. And I sure as heck don’t want another one.”
The pretty secretary shook her head in a disapproving way. “You sound like you’ve been eating green persimmons.”
Olivia tried to laugh, but she wasn’t quite in the mood to make it sound believable. “Wrong. I’ve been eating brain food—you know, like blueberries, salmon and nuts. That’s how I know to avoid men.”
Beatrice laughed, while Wes suddenly appeared in the doorway behind the secretary’s shoulder. “Hey. I don’t think I like the sound of working with a man hater. In case you can’t tell, I happen to be a man.”
Olivia waved a dismissive hand at him. “You’re different. You’re like a pestering brother.” Which was true, she thought. From the moment she’d met her coworker, the two had bonded like brother and sister, which made working together very easy for the both of them.
He said, “Well, little sister, put that paperwork away and grab your backpack. We’ve got to do some work in the field.”
And it couldn’t have come at a better time, she thought. She needed something—anything—to get her mind off of the only man she’d ever really loved.
* * *
That same evening at the Silver Horn ranch, Clancy splashed a measurable amount of brandy into his coffee cup, then carried it across the family room. Sinking down on a long couch, he noticed his brother Rafe studying him over the edge of the latest issue of the Reno Gazette.
“What’s the matter?” Clancy asked him. “You’re looking at me like I’ve got the measles or something.”
Rafe inclined his head toward Clancy’s coffee cup. “The brandy.”
Leaning back against the cushions, he crossed his boots out in front of him. “I’m cold. That’s all. I’ve been cold all day.”
His younger brother rolled his eyes. “Hell, the weather today was pleasant. What are you going to do when it really gets cold? Hang around the fire and wait for spring to come?”
Clancy took a long bracing swig of the laced coffee. He’d always envied the fact that Rafe’s days were never confined to four walls, a phone or computer. As foreman of the Silver Horn, Rafe spent most of his time in the saddle, roaming the endless ranges of Horn land, tending the thousands of cattle that bore the C/C brand. He truly lived the cowboy life. And now there was even more reason for Clancy to wish his life could be more like his brother’s. Rafe had a wife, Lilly, and baby daughter, Colleen, to fill his days with love.
“Spring is months away,” Clancy said. “I’ll just drag out a heavier coat.”
Rafe lay the paper aside and turned his full attention to Clancy. “Did you and the fence contractor come to some sort of deal today?”
“We did. He’ll be starting next week. I told him the area down by Antelope Creek needed first attention.”
“Good. That stretch of fence is definitely in the worst shape. Are my men supposed to help with the fencing or does he have a big enough crew to handle the job?”
“Leave it up to his crew. We’re paying him plenty enough. That will give your men a chance to rebuild some of the corrals down at the ranch yard before you get too busy with the winter feeding.”
Rafe smirked. “They’re sure as heck not going to like doing carpentry work. But it’s got to be done.”
“They can’t play on horseback every day,” Clancy muttered, downing more coffee as he turned his gaze to the wide wall of glass that looked over the backyard of the ranch house. During the daylight hours, the view would stretch for miles beyond the yard to where the distant mountains created a ridge between the ranch and the state of California.
“You have something on your mind, Clancy?”
He glanced at his brother. “Why do you ask that?”
Rafe shrugged. “I’m not sure. You just seem different tonight.”
Clancy released a heavy breath. There wasn’t any point in keeping it a secret, he thought. Sooner or later his family would hear about Olivia being in Carson City anyway.
“I saw Olivia this morning.”
Scooting to the edge of the couch, Rafe stared at him. “You mean the Olivia—as in your ex? You saw her in person?”
Grimacing, Clancy nodded. “In the Grubstake. I went there early so I could have breakfast before I met with Reynolds about the fencing.”
Rafe let out a low whistle. “Oh, man. Did you talk to her?”
Talk? When she’d walked up to him, so much had been going on inside of Clancy that he could hardly remember talking. He mostly remembered feeling a great sense of loss and humiliation. No man wanted to be dumped. Especially by a woman he’d been deeply in love with.
“Briefly. She was there with a man—a coworker. She’s living here in the Carson City area now. Working for the BLM.”
Rafe continued to study him closely as though he feared his big brother was in danger of collapsing or having some sort of mental breakdown. The notion caused Clancy’s jaw to tighten. Olivia might have cut him up pretty bad all those years ago, but he’d survived and grown tougher for it. He needed for Rafe and the rest of his family to understand that.
Rafe shook his head with wonder. “Amazing. Of all the places for her to wind up—right here in your backyard. Reckon that happened on purpose?”
Clancy drained the last of his coffee before casting his brother an annoyed glance. “Not hardly. You know how those types of jobs are—you go where they send you.”
Rafe made a palms-up gesture. “But she could have put in a request for this area. Is she married now?”
“No. Divorced. And apparently no children. At least, she didn’t mention any.” He wasn’t sure how he would feel if he discovered she’d borne another man’s child. Cheated, he supposed. “Arlene, Olivia’s mother, died about a year before Mother passed away.”
“How ironic.”
His throat thick, he said, “That’s putting it mildly.”
Rising to his feet, he carried his cup over to a bar that angled across one corner of the spacious room. If there had been anyone else in the room, Clancy would’ve never brought up his meeting with Olivia. But out of his four brothers, Clancy was closest to Rafe. Though he wasn’t sure why. The two men were very different. Where his brother had always been the first to speak up and the first to lose his temper, Clancy mostly preferred to keep his thoughts to himself and his temper in check. But in all truth, Rafe was the man who kept this ranch pulled together and running at a profit and Clancy greatly admired him for his loyalty to the family business.
“So are you going to see her again?”
Glancing over his shoulder, Clancy frowned at him. “I doubt it. Not unless it happened by accident. I wasn’t about to suggest we might meet somewhere and talk over old times. When a man has been run over once, he doesn’t want to lie down in the middle of the road and beg for it to happen again,” he said flatly.
Rafe shot off the couch and crossed the space to where Clancy stood. “You’re being a fool! If the woman isn’t married, now is your chance.”
“For what? To pick up where we left off?” Clancy countered. “Think about it, Rafe. Could you trust a woman who’d dumped you?”
Shrugging, Rafe said, “Well, Lilly tossed me out for about three weeks and I married her anyway.”
“Try ten years,” he said bitterly, then wiped a hand over his face. “Look, brother, I realize you want me to be happy. But frankly, Olivia doesn’t mean anything to me anymore. I’m not interested.”
“Really? Then why did you tell me that she’s back in town?”
“Like they say, news was light tonight,” Clancy said with sarcasm. “I thought we needed something else to talk about.”
“Don’t try to kid a kidder, brother. You’re not fooling me.”
Turning his back to Rafe, Clancy poured himself another cup of coffee, but this time avoided the brandy. “Okay. If you want me to fess up, then I’ll give it to you. It was jarring as hell to see Olivia again. Especially with her looking so damned pretty. Tell me, Rafe, you’re an expert on women. How does one manage to look sexy wearing a pair of jeans and a plaid work shirt?”
“If she has the right kind of curves she’ll look sexy in anything. And out of it.”
“Yeah. Well, I certainly won’t be privy to that last scenario,” Clancy muttered, then turned to face his brother. “To tell you the truth, Rafe, when I looked at her face this morning, it was like those ten years had suddenly vanished. I wanted to—”
“Grab her up and never let go?” Rafe finished for him.
Clancy released a heavy sigh. “Something like that. Damned fool, aren’t I?”
“No. You’re human. You’re remembering and wondering. And the way I see it, you don’t have a choice. You’ve got to see Olivia again and decide for yourself whether you really want to grab her up and never let go.”
Frowning, Clancy stared down at the brown liquid in his cup. “She might not want to see me again. And she sure as heck might not want to be grabbed up by me.”
“Clancy, you’re a good-looking guy. Persuade her.” With an encouraging grin, he patted Clancy on the shoulder. “It’s almost Colleen’s bedtime. She’ll be expecting me there to tuck her in. I’ll see you in the morning. In the meantime, think about what I told you.”
His brother strode away, and as Clancy stood there in the empty room, he wasn’t sure whether he wanted to curse or laugh. Persuade Olivia? He’d not managed to do that ten years ago. What made him think he could do it now?
He didn’t have the answer to that question. But he was certain of one thing. Seeing Olivia again had proved to him that things had never completely ended between them. At least, not for him.
Chapter Two (#ulink_6f8e7c11-0769-505f-9f0a-bc951b993280)
During the following week, the weather turned colder, but Olivia had always lived in an area where the winters were long and the snowdrifts high. Being outdoors in less than perfect conditions was nothing new to her. Even so, it was a relief when she and Wes finally wrapped up their work in the field and arrived back at the office and out of the cold wind.
She was hanging her coat on a hall tree and dreaming of a hot cup of tea when Beatrice walked up behind her and whispered.
“There’s someone waiting to see you. He’s back in the break room. I thought having him wait there would be better than in your office.”
Perplexed by Beatrice’s covert attitude, she asked, “He? Who is it?”
“Clancy Calhoun.”
Everything inside Olivia suddenly froze and the numbness she was experiencing had nothing to do with the long hours she’d spent out in the cold today.
“Oh. Well, thank you, Beatrice.”
Quickly, she walked out of the room and down a short hallway to the break room that she, Wes and Beatrice shared with the other workers in the building. Since there was no door, she paused at the opening to see Clancy was sitting alone at the end of a long utility table. A brown cowboy hat was resting on his knee and beneath the fluorescent lighting, his hair gleamed with copper lights.
He was facing the opposite end of the room, but as soon as he heard the sound of her footsteps, he turned and quickly rose to his feet.
Wiping her palms against the thighs of her jeans, Olivia made herself step into the room.
“Hello, Clancy. Beatrice told me you were here.” Her voice sounded ridiculously hoarse, but she resisted the urge to clear it. She didn’t want him to guess how her emotions were tumbling around, shaking her to the very core of her being.
With both hands cradling the brim of his hat, he said, “I hope I’m not interrupting your work. She said you’d be returning to the office any minute, so I waited.”
She tried her best to smile as though she was really glad to see him. And deep down a part of her was very glad. But the rest of her was afraid to be near him, terrified that the mere sound of his voice would tear away the protective walls she’d built around her emotions.
“That’s right. We just got in. I’ve not even had time to unthaw yet.” She walked away from him and over to a cabinet counter where a brewing machine was located. “Would you like something to drink? This thing will make coffee, tea or hot chocolate. Take your pick.”
“No, thank you. I can only stay a minute.”
Even though his presence was unsettling, she felt oddly disappointed that his visit was going to be brief.
Dropping a tea bag into a foam cup, she shoved it beneath the brewer. While she watched a stream of steaming water fill the cup, she said, “I’ll be honest, Clancy. I’m very surprised to see you here.”
“I’ll be honest, too. I thought long and hard before I decided to walk into this building,” he admitted.
She momentarily closed her eyes and swallowed before she turned to him. “Exactly why are you here, Clancy?”
While she forced her gaze to meet his, she was shocked to feel her heart contract, then speed into a wild thump. After all this time, she should be able to look at this man and feel no more than she would for any old friend, she thought.
But Clancy wasn’t your friend, Olivia. He was your lover, your fiancé. You curled in his arms and dreamed about spending the rest of your life with him.
His green eyes were making a slow survey of her face, gliding over the curves and angles like a fingertip. When they finally settled on her lips, her breath momentarily caught in her throat.
“I wanted to see you again,” he said frankly. “Do you think we could have supper one evening? Or if not supper, then meet for drinks?”
Of all the things she’d expected him to say, this was not even on her list. In fact, down through the years, she’d always imagined that if she ever did happen to run into Clancy again, he’d most likely greet her with disdain.
She hesitated, her mind whirling with questions and doubts. “Supper? I—don’t know what to say. Why would you want to have supper with me?”
“We were very close once,” he said slowly. “I thought it might be nice for us to catch up a bit.”
He suddenly smiled, the first one she’d seen since spotting him in the Grubstake and the expression was the ray of warmth that melted the last of her resistance. Why not go out with Clancy? she thought. It would prove to herself and to him that the past was in the past and the two of them could be friends.
She smiled back at him. “I think that would be nice, Clancy. Thank you for asking.”
His eyes suddenly sparkled and the sight warmed her. Even in college he’d been a very serious person and she doubted that had changed. But the times he did display a bit of pleasure, it was a moment of pure gold.
“Great,” he said. “So when do you think you might be free? Tomorrow night?”
That soon? Could she possibly get herself mentally braced in that length of time? No, she thought. When it came to this man, two, three, five days wouldn’t make any difference. Besides, this wasn’t a reunion. It was a new beginning as friends. Nothing more, she assured herself.
“That sounds fine.”
He levered his hat back onto his head. “I’ll pick you up about seven, then. Do you live here in town?”
Olivia shook her head. “No. I live east of town. I’ll draw it for you.”
Since her small notebook and pen were still in her shirt pocket, she pulled them out and quickly made a crude map of directions to her house. “It’s a green stucco with dark brown shutters. A couple of dogs will be hanging around in the yard, but they won’t bite.”
“I’ll be there.” He reached for her hand and pressed it tightly between his. “Goodbye, Olivia.”
She smiled and nodded, and yet somewhere inside her she felt tears forming. For one split second she felt the reckless urge to fling herself against him, to beg him to forgive her for being such a fool all those years ago. But thankfully she caught herself before that could happen and managed to reply in a normal voice, “Goodbye, Clancy. See you tomorrow night.”
Dropping her hand, he quickly left the room, and while she waited for the sound of his boot steps to fade away, she drew in several long breaths.
Had she just stepped into a wildfire or was she finally taking a step toward dousing the torch she’d carried all these years for Clancy? Hopefully after tomorrow night, she’d have her answer.
The next evening Clancy was in his office wrapping up the last phone call he planned to take for the day, when his father, Orin, walked through the door. The sixty-two-year-old man was tall and brawny with a pair of shoulders like a linebacker and a thick mane of iron-gray hair. For years after Clancy’s mother had died, his father had more or less been living in the shadows, choosing to remain in the house, dealing with paperwork and leaving the ranch only when a necessary business trip forced him to. But something about Rafe taking the plunge and marrying Lilly had done something to Orin. Over the past several months he’d steadily returned to the vibrant rancher he used to be. Now he was back to riding his horse and doing hands-on work with the ranch crew. Not only that, he was starting to date a young woman, who just happened to be a deputy district attorney for Carson County.
Returning the phone to its cradle, Clancy leaned back casually in his chair while Orin rested a hip on the edge of the desk and pushed up his cuff to take note of the time.
“It’s about your quitting time, isn’t it?” Orin asked.
Clancy nodded. “Sure is. That was my last call. I’m about to head to the house.” He didn’t add that as soon as he showered and changed he was driving into Carson City to see Olivia. Except for Rafe, the rest of his family was unaware that she was now living in the area. And Clancy was going to leave it that way, at least for now.
“Well, I just stopped by to see if Jett had finished writing up that contract for the bull sales. Kim said he’d already left for the day, but had finalized the contract. So that’s good. I want to use that money for more mama cows.”
Clancy gestured to the telephone. “According to the guy I was just talking to you could get thousands of dollars by just signing your name.”
Orin’s frown was skeptical. “Oh. Who was it? Some cattle broker?”
“No. It was that lease hound—the one working for the mining company. This is the second call I’ve gotten from him in the last month.”
Orin’s head wagged back and forth in disbelief. “Even when silver prices were up a few months ago, they were still at the bottom. The effort would do nothing more than tear up our land. Didn’t you make it clear that we weren’t interested?”
“Very clear. But then he started talking gold. I told him there’s never been an indication of gold on the ranch. And that we’re not interested in looking,” Clancy told him.
“Damn right. Here on the Horn our gold is the four-legged sort. That’s the only kind I want to deal with.” Orin slipped off the edge of the desk. “Okay. I’m off to town. Noreen is giving a dinner party in honor of a coworker that’s moving away. For some reason she wanted me to be there.”
Clancy gave his father a pointed smile. “The reason might be that she likes you.”
Orin grinned sheepishly and Clancy couldn’t help but notice that his father looked years younger than this time last year.
“Maybe. A little.” His grin suddenly faded to a look of faint uncertainty. “I’m sure most everyone is calling me a fool for being interested in a woman that’s so much younger than me.”
Noreen was forty-five and looked even younger. Yet Clancy could hardly fault the woman for that. Nor did he want his father to worry over it. “Look, Dad, that’s no one else’s business but your own. If it doesn’t bother you or her, then it’s sure okay with me.”
Orin shrugged. “You’re still young. But a guy like me—I guess I get to wondering what I have to offer her over a man closer to her age. I’ll never look like a—what does the younger generation call a stud now?”
“I wouldn’t know,” Clancy answered drily. “You need to ask Rafe or Finn that question.”
Orin chuckled. “Well, whatever it is, I’ll never look that way again.”
Rising to his feet, Clancy switched off the computer on his desk and picked up a stack of papers. “Don’t sell yourself short, Dad.”
The two men left the office and Clancy paused long enough to drop the work on his secretary’s desk. “I don’t need this until tomorrow afternoon,” he told the young woman with short, chestnut-colored hair. “Go ahead and close up the office.”
The secretary glanced at a big, cedar-framed clock hanging on the wall behind her head. “There’s still an hour to go until quitting time, Clancy.”
He gave her a wink. “Then you’re getting an hour off.”
“And don’t question your boss,” Orin teased her. “Take what you can get out of him.”
Expressing her thanks, the secretary began to shut down the workplace and the two men departed the office building. Outside in the chilly twilight, Orin quickly bade his son good-night and climbed into one of the ranch’s many work trucks.
Obviously, his father wasn’t trying to impress Noreen by showing up in a fancy vehicle, Clancy thought. As for Olivia, he’d learned the hard way that money, or what it could buy, didn’t impress her. If she’d married him, he would have gladly given her anything and everything she’d desired. But she hadn’t wanted wealth. And clearly, she hadn’t needed him. So what did that make him for wanting to take her to dinner tonight? A glutton for punishment? Or a man trying to rid himself of a haunting past?
* * *
An hour later, some thirty miles away in Olivia’s modest stucco, she was digging through her jewelry for a certain pair of earrings when she came across a little white cardboard box pushed into one corner of the drawer.
Leave it there, Olivia. Looking at the thing only hurts you.
Her hand refused to obey the words of warning racing through her head and before she realized it, she was pulling a royal-blue velvet case from the cardboard box and flipping open the lid.
She didn’t know why, tonight of all nights, she felt the urge to look at the ring. Down through the years she’d probably stared a thousand times at the large teardrop diamond. And each time she ended up choking back tears. Tonight was no different and she fiercely blinked her eyes as she slowly traced a finger over the glittering stone.
When she’d ended their engagement, Clancy had insisted that the ring belonged to her and she could do what she wanted with the expensive diamond. She supposed most women would’ve wasted no time in selling the gem or, at the very least, had it and the white-gold setting fashioned into a different piece of jewelry.
During her short marriage to Mark, he’d accidentally discovered the ring in a dresser drawer and demanded that she get rid of it. But Olivia had stubbornly hung on to the ring anyway. And now, whenever she felt particularly lost or lonely, she’d look at the solitaire diamond and remember and wonder what might have been.
Taking a deep, bracing breath, she closed the lid and stuffed the case back in the box and the box back into the drawer. She didn’t have time to dwell on memories or regrets. Clancy would be here soon and she needed to be looking and feeling her best. She wanted him to see that losing him hadn’t ruined her.
* * *
Clancy arrived five minutes before seven and with her nerves on high alert, Olivia opened the door and invited him inside. As soon as his tall frame stepped into the tiny foyer, he swept off his brown cowboy hat and her gaze was instantly drawn to the thick tawny waves covering his head. His hair was one of the most striking things about him and seemed to match his fierce pride and quiet independence. But it was the gentle smile in his eyes that instantly lifted her spirits and brought a smile to her face.
“Hello, Olivia.”
“Good evening, Clancy. Except for fetching my coat and bag, I’m ready. Or would you like to have a drink before we go? I’d be happy to fix you something.”
“Thanks, but I can wait until we get to the restaurant,” he told her.
When he’d walked in, she’d not noticed the small bouquet he’d been holding close down to the side of his leg. Now as he offered them to her, she hardly knew what to think or say. Ever since she’d agreed to see him tonight, she’d been telling herself that the meeting had nothing to do with romance. The whole thing was only a friendly dinner between old acquaintances. Nothing more. So what did the flowers mean?
“I hope you still like daisies,” he said.
“Yes, I do. Thank you.” She accepted the bunch of white flowers, then motioned for him to follow her. “Why don’t you come on into the living room while I put these in a vase and get my things?”
He followed her out of the foyer and into a cozy living area furnished with a couch and two stuffed armchairs. Pausing near the group of furniture, she turned to face him and it was all she could do not to stare. Dressed in a dark green shirt, dark jeans and a brown leather jacket, he was the epitome of a rugged rancher and far more captivating than the college guy she’d fallen in love with.
“Have a seat if you like,” she said in the most casual voice she could muster. “I’ll only be a minute.”
“I’m fine standing,” he assured her. “Take your time.”
Olivia left the room to deal with the flowers and returned moments later wearing a camel-colored coat and clutching a red handbag that matched her high heels. Clancy was still standing where she’d left him, his hat in his hand.
“All set,” she said.
He levered the hat down over his forehead. “Do you need to tend to anything before we leave? The dogs?”
“They’ve already been fed and I let them run loose. I have a cat, too. But she’s hiding under the bed. Except for me, Cleo hates people. As soon as she hears another human voice, she’s gone.”
“Nice cat,” he said.
She walked past him on the way to the foyer and he followed in her footsteps.
“At least I don’t have to worry about anyone taking her away from me.”
“No. That shouldn’t be a worry.”
After she locked the door behind him, they stepped off the porch and crossed the short distance to his waiting truck. A brisk north wind stung Olivia’s cheeks and prompted her to flip up the collar on her coat.
When they reached his vehicle, she noticed the diesel engine was idling and ready to go. He quickly helped her into the warm cab and as soon as he buckled himself beneath the steering wheel, he turned the big, dual-wheeled truck toward town.
As they barreled down the graveled county road, he said, “I think we’re in for some nasty weather.”
“That’s what the long-range forecast is predicting,” Olivia replied. “We have a lot of fieldwork to do this month. It would help if the snow held off for a while, but I understand this area is in extreme drought. You definitely need the snow.”
“The ranchers around here are praying for a wet winter.”
“Then I’ll pray for the snow to come, too. Everything suffers during a drought.”
“You live farther out of town than I expected,” he commented. “Do you like it out here?”
When she’d first met Clancy in college, he’d already grown into a tall young man, but the rest of him had been very lean and wiry. The passing years had filled out his shoulders, arms and legs. Now he looked strong enough to take on a raging bull by the horns, Olivia thought, as she watched him deftly maneuver the truck around a washed-out piece of road.
“I do. I never know when my job might force me to transfer to another place, but I’m hoping I’ll get to sink roots here. That’s why I took a chance and bought property instead of renting. The house is nothing fancy, but I got forty acres with the place, so that makes up for the price I had to pay. Anyway, I like it out here on the edge of the desert. I can see for miles. I do wish I had more than one shade tree, though. I suppose whoever built the place wasn’t into landscaping.”
He glanced at her. “What are you going to do with the forty acres? Run a few cattle?”
She shook her head. “It’s too barren to sustain more than five head. That wouldn’t be worth the effort. But I have thought of getting a couple of horses. I could use them at work. Sometimes we have to ride over a lot of country that can’t be traveled by truck or four-wheeler.”
He grinned. “Well, I can tell you where some pretty good horses are for sale. You might even get a good deal on a pair of them.”
A wan smile touched her lips. “I seriously doubt I could afford anything from the Silver Horn. I don’t need high-powered breeding, anyway. Just gentle, sturdy animals that can carry me over the rocks around here.”
“I said you’d get a discount,” he pointed out.
She sighed. Years ago, Clancy hadn’t really understood the differences between them. How could she make him see that he still didn’t understand? Even with a discount, a Silver Horn horse would be thousands of dollars she didn’t have.
Deciding it was best to ignore that issue, she simply said, “Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind.” Turning her head toward the passenger window and away from his rugged profile, she stared out at the shadowy landscape and wondered if he was feeling the same tension between them that she was feeling. “When I left Idaho, I was still living in the house my mother left to me. Moving away from it has been—a little traumatic.”
“That was near Twin Falls, right?”
She glanced his way. “You remembered.”
“I remember most everything about you, Olivia.”
His comment was so unsettling that she didn’t make any sort of reply. After all, it was the same with her. She remembered everything about him, too. She just wasn’t brave enough to admit it to him.
* * *
Clancy took her to Bonito’s, a rustic Mexican restaurant located on the edge of the city. From their table by the window, the twinkling lights of the city stretched for miles toward the west and the mountains that rimmed Lake Tahoe. Meanwhile, just outside the wall of glass, a Joshua tree and a spiny barrel cactus framed the view.
“Do you eat here often?” Olivia asked as the two of them munched on the chips and salsa the waiter had left behind.
The eating area was rather small and nearly all the tables were occupied. Piped mariachi music was playing quietly in the background, although Clancy had informed her that a live mariachi band played on the weekends. The plastered walls were cracked in some places and the board planked floor had been there for so long that some of the nail heads had been worn away. It was just the type of place that Olivia liked and Clancy knew it.
“No. I don’t eat out much,” he said. “Greta, our house cook, always has nice meals fixed for the family. And I don’t leave the ranch unless I have a reason to.”
“Hmm. I guess I must have been one of those reasons tonight.”
He cocked a brow at her. “You could put it that way.”
Dropping her gaze from his face, she took a sip from her water glass. “You never were much of a social person. That hasn’t changed?”
“I’m not a hermit. I get out occasionally. But the ranch takes up most of my time.”
While they’d been engaged, Olivia had never carefully measured her words before she’d spoken them to Clancy. She’d felt free to say anything, about any subject. Now their past together was getting in the way, blocking the things that would have otherwise come naturally to her lips.
She said, “I’m sure it does. From what I hear, your family’s ranch has grown even bigger than what it was when you and I—when we were in college.”
The faint grimace on his face told her that he hadn’t missed the abrupt change of her words and suddenly Olivia realized how cowardly she was being. There was no point in trying to evade or dance around the issue of their past. It had happened. It couldn’t be changed. So there was no purpose in making herself miserable by trying to pretend otherwise.
He said, “Yes. It’s grown. My grandfather is still purchasing land whenever it becomes available. And like I told you the other day, we lease, too. Our lease land has also increased. So that means with more land, Dad wants more cattle. It’s a circle that goes around with my grandfather and father. And I have to try to keep up with the business ends of their deals.”
She smiled faintly. “That’s what you got your degree for. Now you’re putting it to use. I’m sure it must feel really nice to be able to put your knowledge and effort into something that actually belongs to you.”
Resting his forearms on the edge of the table, he leaned slightly toward her. “So tell me, Olivia, when did you go back to college? After your mother passed?”
Nodding, she said, “She died in the fall, after the semester had started. That was two years after I left UNLV. I waited until winter break to start my studies again. But I didn’t go back to Las Vegas. I had all my hours transferred to Boise State.”
A small frown furrowed his brow. “Oh. But you’d worked and saved just so you could go to UNLV,” he said. “It was your dream to get your degree there.”
When he’d said he’d not forgotten anything, he’d been right. Olivia wasn’t sure if that made her feel better or worse. She sighed. “Yes. But—well, some dreams just can’t come true. And I’ll be honest, Clancy. It wouldn’t have been the same without you there. So I—didn’t go back.”
Even though she wasn’t looking at him directly, she could feel his gaze slipping over her, weighing each word and expression. What did he expect to find? she wondered. What did he want to hear from her? That she’d made a horrible mistake by ending their engagement? That she’d been a fool for not trying to hang on to something as precious as what they’d shared?
“Some things just never turn out like we think they will.”
His remark shot an arrow directly into the middle of her chest. “No. Some things never do,” she murmured.
A long, awkward silence followed until Clancy finally spoke again. “Is that where you met your ex? At Boise?”
She shook her head. “No. I met Mark shortly after Mom died. I was still living in Twin Falls then and working as a bank teller. He was a carpenter and was a regular customer at that particular branch.”
“So what happened? Why did you get divorced?”
Because deep down I was still in love with you.
The thought sprang out of nowhere and she frantically shoved it away before she answered, “Because he turned out to be far different than what he first appeared to be. Before we married I made it clear to him that my plans were to go back to college and acquire my degree. He was perfectly agreeable with that until I actually became his wife. Then everything was different. He quickly decided that he didn’t want me going to college or having a job with the BLM. He also changed his mind about us having children. He believed our lives would be better without the complications that came with kids. In other words, all the things that were important to me, Mark wanted me to give up. I couldn’t do that, Clancy. I’m sure that makes me sound stubborn and selfish to you. But I had already made a huge sacrifice when I left you to take care of Mom. I wasn’t willing to make another one.”
“Is that what you call it? ‘A sacrifice’?”
Her throat was so thick, all she could manage to do was nod.
His gaze locked on hers. “Oh, Olivia,” he murmured ruefully. “Why did you marry him when you knew that I was waiting?”
The dark anguish in his eyes was more than she could bear. Jumping to her feet, she blindly hurried through the busy tables until she reached the ladies’ room.
Once inside, she dropped her head in her hands and allowed the scalding tears to flow.
Chapter Three (#ulink_78c3269b-ba0b-5543-bf13-74c8514bad41)
Eventually, a woman with a little girl entered the ladies’ room and the distraction forced Olivia to dry her tears and attempt to gather her composure.
Leaving the table that way made her look worse than an emotional teenager, she thought, as she pressed a damp paper towel beneath her eyes. But the only other option she’d had was to sit there and let him see a stream of regretful tears rolling down her face. And she wasn’t up to dealing with that sort of humiliation. Going back out there and facing him again was going to be bad enough.
Tossing the paper towel into a trash basket, she smoothed down the skirt of her black dress and with a bracing breath walked out among the diners. As soon as Clancy spotted her approaching the table, he rose to his feet and helped her into her chair.
Once he’d returned to his own seat, she quickly apologized. “I’m sorry, Clancy. I shouldn’t—”
“No, Olivia,” he interrupted. “I’m the one who should be apologizing. I shouldn’t have said that to you. Not here. Not now. Let’s forget it, shall we?”
While she’d been in the ladies’ room, the waiter had served their meal. One glance at Clancy’s plate told her he’d not yet touched his food. Which made her feel even worse. She’d not only embarrassed the man, she’d starved him on top of it.
“You should’ve started eating without me,” she said. “I wouldn’t have minded.”
“The waiter just brought it. So it’s still hot. No harm done.”
He looked across the table at her and she could see concern in his eyes. The notion that her feelings were more important to him than the meal surprised her and for the first time this evening, she felt herself start to relax.
“I am hungry,” she admitted, then joked, “It takes a lot of energy to have an emotional breakdown.”
To her amazement, he reached across the table and wrapped his hand firmly around hers. His touch was rough and warm and incredibly familiar. But how could that be, she wondered, after so much time had passed and so much had happened?
“And I don’t want you to have another one,” he said gently. “We’ll keep our talk in the present. Deal?”
She gave him a grateful smile, but underneath she was actually terrified. Being with Clancy wasn’t supposed to be affecting her this way. His touch shouldn’t be making her long for more, making her wonder what it would be like to kiss him again, make love to him again.
“It’s a deal,” she agreed, then carefully pulling her hand from his, she picked up her fork and started to eat.
He followed her example and as the two of them began consuming the spicy food, Clancy purposely steered the conversation to Olivia’s job.
“So, are you doing the same type of work here in Carson City that you were doing back in Idaho?”
“Yes. Land management. I worked out of the Shoshone district there. That’s where I started about seven years ago and I liked it. But this move to Carson City brought a small promotion with it. One that I’d worked hard to get.”
“So, what sort of things do you mainly look for when you’re seeing a piece of land for the first time?”
He appeared to be genuinely interested and that was something new for Olivia. The few men she’d dated in the past years never wanted to hear about her work. They mostly thought she just poked around in the dirt and looked at bugs and plants. None of them had understood or cared that nature had a rhyme and reason and her job was to make sure it stayed in balance. But Clancy made a living off the land. He understood.
“The watershed and whether there’s too much or not enough. Then we study the grasses, trees and other vegetation to see what sort of wildlife it’s capable of sustaining. Of course if it’s rangeland for livestock then other things are involved. But you’re a rancher, you already know all about that.”
He nodded and as her gaze swept over him, she wondered, as she had so many times, whether he’d ever married or if he had a special woman in his life now.
“Do you ever work with minerals?”
She asked, “You mean land that’s being mined?”
He nodded and she shook her head. “A little. Why? Is part of the Silver Horn land being mined?”
“No. But I’ve been getting calls from a lease hound. It seems odd to me. These days silver isn’t worth digging out of the ground.”
“Could be his connections are searching for the yellow stuff. Not silver.”
“Well, this is Nevada and I suppose there’s always someone out there who likes to take a gamble on finding a fortune,” he said.
“Yes. Finding it the easy way,” she agreed.
For the next few minutes, Clancy continued to focus their conversation on her job and then he changed it completely by suddenly asking, “What is your brother doing now? Is he still in the military?”
“He’s no longer in the army. But I couldn’t tell you what he’s doing now. The last time I talked with him he was in Oregon, working for a timber company.”
Glancing over at her, he picked up a tortilla and folded it in half. “So you two still aren’t close.”
“No. That will never happen. Todd is like our father. He doesn’t need or want to be close to anyone.”
“And what about your father? Do you ever see him?”
Her gaze fell to the food that was left on her plate. “A couple of years ago he showed up out of the blue. Said he was in the area and thought he should say hello. He didn’t even know that Mom was dead. When she passed, I had tried to locate him, but never had any luck. I honestly think he uses aliases just to keep the bill collectors and bookies off his back.”
“Learning that Arlene was gone must have been a shock for him.”
Shaking her head, she lifted her gaze back to him. “No. You can’t shock a person who doesn’t care, Clancy.”
“I’m sorry, Olivia.”
She gave him a brave smile. “See, I’m pretty much without a family. So I’d rather hear about yours. How are your brothers?”
“They’re all doing well. Evan is a detective for the sheriff’s department now. Rafe is foreman of the Horn and Finn manages our horse division. Bowie has been in the marines for close to seven years now. We thought he was getting out last year, but he re-upped for another stint. I think he’s still trying to decide what he wants to do with himself.”
Finished with her food, she laid her fork aside. “Do any of them have families?”
“Rafe. He married a nurse and has a baby daughter, Colleen. They live in the ranch house, too, so they’ve livened up the place.”
“That’s nice. But I’m surprised to hear that only one of your brothers has gotten married.” Her gaze wandered across his face until their eyes met. “Especially you.”
“Why do you say that?”
“When I thought of you these past years, I always pictured you with a wife and at least two children. What happened?”
He shrugged. “I never found the right person. And you? Do you ever think about trying marriage a second time?”
She hoped her smile didn’t reveal any of the sadness she was feeling. “Mark turned out to be the wrong person for me. But I still hope that someday I’ll find the right man.”
“I have no doubt you’ll find him, Olivia.”
* * *
A half hour later, after they finished dessert and coffee, the two of them left Bonito’s and Clancy headed the truck out of town, toward Olivia’s place.
The night had grown colder and bits of icy precipitation dotted the windshield. Throughout the drive, Olivia sat huddled in her coat, staring pensively ahead.
Spending the evening with him had been hard on her, Clancy decided. He’d not wanted or expected it to, but it had and that bothered him greatly. He’d not asked her to dinner in order to put her emotions through a meat grinder. Actually, if anyone had asked him why he’d invited Olivia to join him this evening, he wouldn’t have been able to give them a sensible answer. Except that seeing her that morning in the Grubstake hadn’t been enough. He’d wanted more time to talk with her, to make certain that the attraction he’d once felt for her was dead and gone.
What a damned fool notion that had been, he thought grimly. All through dinner, he’d hardly been able to keep his eyes off the woman. With a black dress hugging her curves and her dark hair waving upon her shoulders, she’d looked like a sultry vision. Time had matured her face into beautiful curves and angles and shadowed her eyes with smoky sensuality. Now all he could think about was taking her into his arms and making love to her.
When he pulled to a stop in front of her house and shut off the engine, she immediately unsnapped her seat belt and reached for the handbag resting on the floorboard near her feet.
“Thank you for the flowers and the delicious dinner,” she said somewhat stiffly. “It was very nice, Clancy.”
Her proper and polite response made him want to curse out loud. All during their evening, he’d felt her measuring her words, guarding her every reaction to him. The only time he’d seen a genuine emotion out of her was when she’d tearfully ran from the table. And she’d ended up apologizing for even that reaction.
“You’re welcome,” he told her.
He unbuckled his seat belt with the intentions of helping her out of the cab, but she quickly reached across the console and placed a deterring hand upon his forearm.
“There’s no need for you to walk me to the door. I know the way.”
Suddenly it was all too much and before he realized what he was doing, his hands were locked around both her wrists.
“Yes, the trail to your doorstep is easy to find. But do you know your way back into my arms?”
She drew in a sharp breath while her eyes grew wide with disbelief.
“Clancy.”
The moment she whispered his name, his gaze focused on the moist curve of her lips and he suddenly decided he couldn’t wait on her answer. He drew her forward until her upper body was pressed against his and his lips had covered hers.
He half expected her to draw back or try to resist him in some way. But he was wrong. She leaned into him and opened her mouth willingly beneath his, and as he deepened the kiss, his brain went haywire. The only commands it could follow were the urgings of his body telling him to keep kissing her over and over.
His senses were so lost, he didn’t know how much time had passed before one of her hands fluttered against his chest and she eased her lips away from his. The loss of their soft warmth was a shock to his senses and Clancy opened his eyes to see her face was a picture of astonishment.
“Olivia, I—”
Before she could finish, she turned away from him and jerked the door latch. “I’m going in!”
Even though she’d not mentioned him joining her, Clancy practically leaped out of the truck and rounded the cab so that he could help her to the ground.
Once she was standing next to him, he continued to hold on to her elbow. Cold wind whipped across the hood of the truck and spattered them with bits of snow, but Clancy barely felt it. His body still felt like a roaring furnace. “I think we need to talk about this, Olivia.”
“What is there to talk about? Nothing. This is it. I’m not going to go out with you again,” she said flatly.
With his hand still on her arm, he urged her toward the house. “Let’s go inside and get out of this weather.”
Thankfully, she didn’t protest. Instead she turned and made a dash for the house with Clancy following close on her heels. Once they were inside, she stopped in the middle of the living room and began removing her coat. Clancy quickly stepped forward to help her and for a moment, as he lifted the coat from her shoulders, he wondered how it would feel to always be privy to her closeness, to know that each night of their lives she’d be lying by his side, warming his body. Or would he constantly be wondering how soon it would be before she left him again?
“I can make us more coffee if you’d like a cup,” she suggested.
She was still trying to be polite and keep a cool distance between them. The idea was ridiculous and annoyed the heck out of Clancy, especially after she’d kissed him with such feeling.
He handed the coat to her. “Who are you trying to fool, Olivia? Me or yourself?”
She tossed the garment over the arm of the couch, then turned a confused look on him. “What are you talking about?”
He shook his head. “You just kissed me like you wanted to set me on fire. Now you act like we ought to sit down over a cup of coffee and discuss the weather.”
She closed the small space between them and he could see hot color staining her cheeks, but whether it was from anger or embarrassment, he had no way of knowing.
“It might as well be the weather, Clancy. Because that kiss—well, that was a onetime thing. Just chalk it up to old memories and leave it at that.”
Amazed by her response, he asked, “Leave it? Just like that?”
Her lips pressed to a thin line as she glanced away from him. “Why did you invite me out tonight, anyway, Clancy? To test me? Hurt me? Exactly what are you doing?”
Groaning with frustration, he lifted his hat off his head and wiped a hand through his hair. “The last thing I want to do is hurt you, Olivia. I—” Unsure of how to explain himself, he walked over to the couch and sank onto the edge of the cushion. With his forearms resting across his open knees and his hat dangling from his hands, he looked up at her. “Okay, Olivia, I’m going to be honest. You asked if I was testing you, but it’s really the other way around. I wanted to test myself. Ever since you walked out of my life, I’ve wondered how I would feel if I ever saw you again. Would I hate you or want you, or look at you with total indifference? After seeing you the other morning in the Grubstake, I had to find out.”
He could see her mind spinning as she walked over to the couch and sank down beside him. “And how do you feel?”
Her voice had dropped to a husky murmur and just the sound of it tightened his body with desire.
He blew out a heavy breath. “I think that kiss answers your question and mine.”
She didn’t make any sort of reply. Instead, she closed her eyes and bent her head as though she’d just been handed a prison sentence.
“Oh, Clancy, you can’t be serious.”
“I was serious ten years ago. Now I’m not sure how I feel. All I know is that when I look at you I still want you. And from the way you kissed me, I think you feel the same way.”
Her head jerked up and her gray eyes clashed with his. “And what if I do?” she challenged. “What if there is a flame still between us? That doesn’t mean we should try to fan it!”
“You think ignoring it would be better?”
Her hand curled over his forearm and Clancy felt the heat of her fingers all the way up to his shoulder. It wasn’t right, he thought, that this woman, of all women, had to be the one who lit a fire in him, who made him want and dream and love.
She said, “Look, Clancy, I’ve spent all these years trying to forget what happened between us. And I’ll admit that I agreed to this date tonight because I believed it would convince me that—well, everything we ever felt for each other was gone. That kiss was nice. Very nice. But I don’t want it to happen again. I don’t want to try to stir up old feelings and then—well, have it all end a second time.”
“You say that like you’re certain a second time around for us wouldn’t work,” he said.
“I’m not sure of anything,” she said flatly. “Except that I’ve already had one failed marriage. I don’t want to make any more mistakes.”
“Who said anything about marriage?”
Her spine stiffened and she pulled her hand from his arm.
“No one,” she said coldly. “You don’t have to marry someone to make a mistake with them.”
It was clear to Clancy that he’d said the wrong thing to her, but damn it, she had his head in such a spin he hardly knew what he was doing or saying.
“Olivia, I didn’t mean—maybe saying goodbye would be the right thing for us. But what we had all those years ago was special. I don’t think you’ll deny that. If some of those feelings are still there, we need to see where they might take us. If it turns out that all we have between us is a pile of dead ashes, then we can part knowing that we’re not losing anything.”
Groaning with anguish, she rose from the couch and walked across the room. Pausing in front of the picture window, she said, “And what if we rekindled our romance, Clancy? Where could that possibly lead us?” Glancing over her shoulder at him, she shook her head. “No. You’ll always resent me for leaving you and going to my mother. And—”
Before she could finish, he jumped to his feet and hurried over to her. “Get this straight, Olivia, I never had an issue with you going to help your mother. Dear God, I’m not heartless. She needed you. It’s the fact that you used her as an excuse to end our engagement. And then once she was gone, you chose not to contact me. Instead, you married another man. Why?”
Outrage clamped her jaws tight. “I’m not going to talk with you about that tonight! It’s none of your business. When I married Mark, you and I were already finished.”
“No! You were already finished, Olivia. Like a damned fool I was still hanging on, hoping that once things were resolved with your mother, you’d come to me. You cut me out of your life then and you obviously want to keep me cut out now. I should be able to get that through my head. But for some reason I can’t.”
Bending her head, she instantly twisted her back to him. “I don’t know, Clancy,” she said in a low, hoarse voice. “Maybe someday you’ll see that I’m not your kind. I never was and never will be.”
“If that’s what you think, then I’m wasting my time here. Goodbye, Olivia. I hope you enjoy your new home in Carson City,” he said bitterly, then turned and hurried out of the house before he could say something he might regret for the rest of his life.
* * *
Throughout the next week, the weather turned bitterly cold and Olivia had to deal with a pile of work both inside and outside of the office. Which was a good thing, she told herself, as she rubbed her tired eyes and tried to focus on the notes in front of her. Trudging through the snow and dealing with paperwork helped to keep her mind off the disastrous evening she’d had with Clancy.
The night he’d stormed out of her house it was as if he’d taken every light with him. Now each time she walked into the living room, she envisioned him sitting there on the couch, his hat in his hands, his hair waved across his forehead.
Seven days had passed since that night and by now she’d expected to have put the whole incident behind her. Instead, her thoughts were being consumed more and more with the man.
If some of those feelings are still there, we need to see where they might take us.
This past week his words had returned again and again until she wanted to scream with frustration. So what if she still felt something for the man, or he for her? Nothing would ever evolve from them. He’d more or less proclaimed that marriage wasn’t on his mind. So what was on his mind? Getting her back in bed?
That question had her mind instantly replaying the kiss they’d shared in his truck and the memory was enough to heat her face. She’d kissed him as though they’d never been apart. She’d kissed him as though she’d never stopped loving him. And then, like an idiot, she’d tried to erect a barrier between them and pretend it had been nothing to her. That he was nothing to her.
Oh, Lord, it was no wonder that he’d left angry. And no wonder that after all these days she was still in a miserable state of mind. If she had any kind of courage at all, she’d drive out to the Silver Horn ranch, face him and try to explain herself. But would that solve anything?
“It’s time for me to head home, Liv. Wes has already gone out the door. Are you staying late this evening?”
Beatrice’s voice interrupted her dismal thoughts and Olivia turned away from her desk to see the secretary standing in the open doorway. The woman had already donned her coat and shoulder bag and covered her hair with a black beret.
“I want to finish a few more notes before I leave,” she told the young woman. “Don’t worry. I’ll lock things up.”
“You’ve had a long day,” Beatrice said. “You ought to finish that tomorrow.”
Olivia smiled at her. “I’ll be finished in a few minutes and then I’ll head on home.”
“Well, drive carefully. I glanced outside earlier and it’s snowing again.”
“I’ll be careful and you do the same.”
With a backward wave, Beatrice disappeared and Olivia went back to typing up the notes she’d scribbled down earlier this morning when she and Wes had visited a section of state park land that was losing an inordinate amount of pines to a spreading parasite.
She was finishing the last paragraph when a knock suddenly sounded on the doorjamb. Startled, she whirled her chair around and stared with shock at the man standing in the dimly lit opening.
“Clancy!”
He stepped into the room and Olivia could see his sheepskin jacket and brown Stetson were dusted with snowflakes, while his cheeks were ruddy from being beaten by the freezing wind.
“I met your secretary as she was leaving,” he explained. “She told me I’d find you here working.”
Her mind whirling with questions, she slowly rose to her feet. “What are you doing here?”
His expression suddenly took on a sheepish quality. “I wanted to apologize to you.”
“I don’t understand,” she said, her voice scarcely above a whisper.
He closed the small distance between them and as his hands closed over the top of her shoulders, Olivia’s heart leaped into a wild gallop.
“Neither do I, Livvy. All week long I’ve thought about everything I said to you. And I realized I behaved badly. I asked you out and then started beating you up emotionally. I’m sorry. Very sorry. And I wanted you to know that.”
Suddenly her throat was so thick all she could manage was to choke out his name. And then before she could ponder or stop herself, she flung her arms around his waist and buried her face in the middle of his chest.
“Oh, Clancy, I’m sorry, too.” Tears flooded her eyes and as they spilled onto her cheeks, she didn’t try to stem them. It felt too good to finally quit hiding her feelings, to finally let him see how much the past had hurt her.

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