Читать онлайн книгу «Not a Marrying Man» автора Miranda Lee
Not a Marrying Man
Miranda Lee
He doesnt do for ever British billionaire Warwick Kincaid likes to take risks though they dont include marriage and children. Twelve months is his limit when it comes to relationships. Warwick asks beautiful Sydney receptionist Amber Roberts to move into his luxury penthouse, and she dares to hope he might have changedBut after theyve been together ten months Warwick starts to act cold and withdrawn. Is Ambers time up, just like the women before her? The chemistry between them remains white-hot, and she finds it hard to believe that her time with Warwick is really over
Just one night, hed told himself at the time.
To see how it would feel to make love to someone wholesome. Someone who blushed when you looked deep into her eyes. Someone whose attraction for him shocked her enough to make her resign.
Well, hed found out what it was likeand, come the next morning, he hadnt been able to let her go.
But now the time had come for him to do so.
Time to be cruel to be kind.
Please dont start sounding like a wife, Amber, he said coldly.
About the Author
MIRANDA LEE is Australian, and lives near Sydney. Born and raised in the bush, she was boarding-school-educated, and briefly pursued a career in classical music, before moving to Sydney and embracing the world of computers. Happily married, with three daughters, she began writing when family commitments kept her at home. She likes to create stories that are believable, modern, fast-paced and sexy. Her interests include meaty sagas, doing word puzzles, gambling and going to the movies.
NOT A
MARRYING MAN
MIRANDA LEE
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
PROLOGUE
Excerpts from Amber Robertss diary during September of her twenty-fifth year.
Tuesday
What a tiresome day! Arrived at work to find that the hotel had been sold and the new owner would be visiting the premises mid-morning. Hes a British businessman called Warwick Kincaid. According to Jill, hes a rather infamous entrepreneur with fingers in lots of pies and a reputation for not holding on to anything for longhis girlfriends as well as his many and varied commercial ventures. How she knew all that I have no idea. But then Im not addicted to gossip mags the way Jill is. Naturally, everyone went into a flap, wondering if their jobs were safe. Not me so much since Im not all that wrapped in mine. Though I dont want to lose it just at the moment. Hard to save up a deposit on a house without a salary. Anyway, Warwick Kincaid never showed up in the end. Too busy, we were eventually told. Not sure if thats good news or bad news. Hes supposed to reschedule for tomorrow.
Wednesday
Well, he showed up this time. Seriously wish he hadnt. What can I say? Hes as up himself as I imagined. But younger. Late thirties, maybe forty. Hes also the best-looking man Ive ever met. I couldnt stop staring at him. He noticed of course. And he stared right back. Ive never blushed so much in all my life. He didnt stay all that long but hes coming back tomorrow to talk to all the staff, one at a time, on a mission to find out why a stylish boutique hotel situated in one of the best areas of Sydney isnt turning over a profit. His words, not mine. Jill said afterwards that he fancied me and that I should watch myself. I laughed and told her not to be so silly, that I was in love with Cory and no man, no matter how tall, dark and handsomeor richwould get to even first base with me. But you know what? When Cory picked me up tonight, I looked at him and didnt feel anything like the buzz I felt today when I looked at Warwick Kincaid. Later, I was relieved when Cory said he wanted an early night. It sounds crazy, but meeting Warwick Kincaid has made me wonder if Im really in love with Cory. Maybe Im just in love with the idea of getting married and having the house and family of my own that Ive always wanted. Its a worry all right. Sos the way Ive been fussing over what Ill wear tomorrow. I have a feeling Im not going to sleep too well tonight. But I have to if I want to look beautiful in the morning. Oh, goodness, did I just think that? Maybe it would be better if I didnt sleep. Must go now. Have to do my nails and put a treatment in my hair.
Thursday
Im almost afraid to write down what happened today. Because if I do, it will become more real, more powerful, and even more disturbing. Not that anything really happened. I mean, he didnt make a pass at me or anything like that. He just talked to me about the hotel, the same way he talked to everyone else. Seemed happy with my suggestion that the hotel needed some more in-house facilities like a gym and a restaurant. At least a lounge bar where guests could relax and have a drink. On the surface our conversation was strictly business, but all the while those piercing blue eyes of his never left mine. Not for a second. And it wasnt just the way he stared at me. There was something else. I know it wasnt just me. It wasnt my imagination. Something was there, zapping back and forth across the desk that separated us. An electric charge that was both exciting and enervating. When our discussion was over and I had to stand up, I found that my legs had almost gone to jelly. Somehow I made it out of the office and back to the front desk where I slumped down into my chair. I felt faint. I still feel faint thinking about it. And all Ive done this evening is think about it. My whole world has been tilted on its axis. How can I get engaged to Cory now when I know that I dont love him? I mean, how could I love him but want to sleep with another man? And I do. I want to have sex with Warwick Kincaid. I cant believe I just admitted that, but whats the point of keeping a diary if you lie to it? So, yes, I want to sleep with Warwick Kincaid. But that isnt love, is it? Thats just lust. Can you be in love with one man and in lust with another? Maybe you can. What do I know? Ive never felt anything like this before. What I need is to talk to someone about it. Not with my girlfriends, though. Theyre all silly as wet hens when it comes to the opposite sex. Not Mum, either. Shed be dead shocked. She thinks Im a good girl. Which I thought I was too, till today. Maybe Aunt Kate. Shes seen a lot of life. Ill ring Aunt Kate tomorrow and ask her. Shell tell me how it is, warts and all. Yes, thats what Ill do.
Friday
Well, Warwick Kincaid came back again first thing this morning and totally ignored me, which I found to my disgust upset me terribly. I should have been grateful. Anyway, I was so annoyed with myself that by lunchtime I made the decision to resign. I knew I couldnt work for that man a minute longer. I waited till he was heading for home at the end of the day before I handed him the letter of resignation that Id typed up during my lunch hour. He read it straight away, then gave me the longest, most intense look. Of course I blushed again. Then he said fine, he accepted my resignation, after which he shocked me rigid by asking me out to dinner tonight. I know I should have said no. I know hes the kind of man who wants pretty young girls like me for one thing, and one thing only. But I didnt say no. I said yes. Because the shocking truth is that I want him for the same thing. Im not in love with him. Heavens, Im not sure I even like him. But Im going to end up in bed with him tonight. Id be a fool to think hes going to feed me then bring me straight home. On top of that, I have an awful feeling that going to bed with Warwick Kincaid is going to change my life in ways that I cant as yet imagine. Theres no point in ringing Aunt Kate now. She cant help me. No one can. I feel like crying. This is not what I want but I cant seem to help myself. Mum thinks Im going out with Cory tonight so she wont be worried if I dont come home. I always stay at Corys place on a Friday night. At least I did the right thing by ringing Cory and breaking up with him. I told him that Id met someone else and that I was sorry. He took the news rather well, I thought, which was of some comfort. But theres no going back now. Ive made my bed, so speak, and Ill just have to lie in it
CHAPTER ONE
July, ten months later
AMBERS teeth clenched hard in her jaw as she checked her phone for messages again. Still nothing from Warwick. She punched in his mobile number and was told for the umpteenth time that his phone was not available. She didnt leave a message. There was no point. Shed already left three, each one sounding more frustrated than the last.
When shed suggested a romantic dinner for two tonight rather than a restaurant meal, Warwick had promised to be home by seven-thirty. But then hed messaged her shortly before six saying hed been delayed and that he might be back a bit late, maybe by eight oclock.
It was now almost nine and still there was no sign of him. No more messages, either.
Surely you have time to call me, Amber muttered under her breath as she returned to the kitchen, threw her cell phone onto the black granite counter-top, then switched off the oven in which the already overdone beef stroganoff had been keeping warm.
At least she hadnt started cooking the rice. Maybe the meal was still salvageable. Though her own appetite had long gone.
Opening the oversized stainless-steel fridge, which never held all that much foodnot much point when they rarely ate at homeAmber reached for the bottle of New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc, which had become her favourite, and poured herself a glass. Carrying it with her and sipping at the same time, she made her way back through the dining room, grimacing as she passed the beautifully set table before heading for the balcony and the hopefully soothing effect of the water view.
Using her free hand, she slid open one of the glass doors that led out onto the huge curving balcony and that fronted the entire apartment, providing a spectacular view of Sydney Harbour. Unfortunately, it was freezing out there, the stiff breeze that came off the water quickly making a mess of Ambers long hair. Grimacing, she turned and hurried back into the temperature-controlled interior, shutting the glass door behind her. Shed forgotten for a moment that it was winter, Warwick always keeping the apartment pleasantly warm.
Putting her wine glass down on one of the glass-topped side tables that flanked the white leather sofa, Amber made her way across the plushly furnished living room and into the vast expanse of the master bedroom. Her chest tightened as she took in the turned-down bed, the cream satin sheets and the scented candles shed placed on the bedside tables, in anticipation of the evening ahead.
Bastard, she muttered, and marched on into the cream marble en suite bathroom where she took a brush out of the drawer on her side of the twin vanities and began attacking her ruffled hair with angry strokes.
It didnt take her long to put order into her hair which was easily managed, being long and straight with a blunt-cut fringe.
Her ruffled emotions, however, were not so easily controlled.
Amber could still remember the first time shed stood on this very spot, looking into this mirror, her blue eyes wide with excitement. It had been the night shed gone to dinner with Warwick, the night her life had changed for ever.
Hed taken her to a five-star restaurant first, where hed impressed her with the very best of food and wine, along with his highly entertaining conversation. Itd been impossible for a twenty-five-year-old girl whod only left Australia for family holidays in Bali and Fiji not to be impressed with this man whod been everywhere and done everything. Impossible not to be flattered by the fact that someone of his intelligence and status would choose to be with her: Amber Roberts, receptionist.
Afterwards, hed brought her back here, without bothering to make any excuses, his intentions perfectly clear to Amber as they had been from the moment hed asked her out.
Shed tried not to appear too blown away, either by his Italian sports car, or his multimillion-dollar Point Piper apartment, which hed bought two weeks earlier, fully furnished. But she was an ordinary working-class girl whod been brought up in the western suburbs of Sydney. She wasnt used to this kind of luxury living. She certainly wasnt used to this kind of man.
He hadnt just swept her off her feet and into his bed that night. Hed taken possession of her with a power and a passion that had left her, not only reeling, but ready to say yes to anything he wanted.
But what hed wanted had been slightly surprising. Shed feared, when shed woken in his king-sized bed the following morning, that that might be that. She was sure it would be a case of hasta la vista, baby.
Instead, hed pulled her to him, told her he was crazy about her and asked her to become his girlfriend. Not just in a casual relationship, either. He wanted her to move in with him, travel with him, be with him all the time. She wouldnt be able to work, of course. She had to be ready to accompany him at a moments notice. He travelled quite a lot, both for business and pleasure.
Shed been about to blindly say yes when hed qualified the terms of the relationship he was proposing.
Just so you dont get the wrong idea, hed added. I dont do marriage and children. And I dont do for ever. I have a notoriously low boredom threshold. Twelve months is usually my limit when it comes to any woman. Though with you, my sweet lovely Amber, I just might make an exception. To be honest, youre already one big exception. Up till now, Ive never asked a woman to live with me. I dare say its going to cost me dearly in the end, but theres something about you which I find totally irresistible. So what do you say, beautiful? Do you want to get aboard the Kincaid roller-coaster ride, or not?
She should still have said no, despite the seductive flattery hed included in what was really a totally appalling and extremely selfish proposition. But how did a girl say no to more of what shed experienced the night before? Amber had never known such excitement, or such pleasure. There were things Warwick knew about lovemaking that had quite blown her away. Hed been able to turn her on and keep her that way for hours, reducing her to total mush.
So of course shed said yes, and now here she was ten months later, still his live-in girlfriend. Or his mistress, as Aunt Kate had once caustically called her.
But for how much longer?
This was the third time lately, Amber conceded as she stared blankly into the vanity mirror, that Warwick had let her down. A couple of weeks ago, hed cancelled a weekend getaway to the Hunter Valley that shed been looking forward to, instead jetting off by himself to New Zealand with two of his business associates to go heliskiing, a high-risk, thrill-seeking, extremely dangerous sport that had recently cost other lives and that had left her worried sick all weekend. But his worst transgression, in her opinion, had been when hed refused to accompany her to Aunt Kates funeral last week, claiming hed had important business to attend to that day, then adding insult to injury by saying that the old duck hadnt liked him and he hadnt liked her, either!
Which was totally beside the point. Amber had been very fond of her aunt Kate and terribly upset by her aunts rather sudden death of a stroke. Shed only been seventy-two, hardly ancient.
It had been horrible, sitting in that church all by herself, then having to defend Warwicks absence afterwards. Her relationship with him had already alienated her from her family to a degree. Hed only accompanied her to two family gatherings during the time theyd been together, Christmas Day at her parents house in Carlingford, and then last Easter, to a family barbecue at her aunt Kates place up at Wamberal Beach on the Central Coast.
And whilst hed been quite polite to everyone, hed somehow made it obviousto her at leastthat hed been bored rigid. On both occasions theyd been the first to leave.
Ambers two older brothers hadnt pulled any punches last week when it had come to making forthright remarks about her wealthy lover not bothering to attend Aunt Kates funeral. Even Warwicks lending to her of his flashy red Ferrari for the drive up to Wamberal hadnt softened their disapproval over his absence.
And theyd been quite right. He should have gone with her. His claiming that hed had important business to attend to that day had just been an excuse. If hed cared about her at all, he would have made other arrangements and driven her to the funeral himself.
By the time Amber had arrived back home after the wake, she hadnt been able to contain her emotions, telling Warwick exactly what she thought of his lack of sensitivity and support, before flouncing off to sleep in one of the two guest bedrooms.
Shed been half expecting him to come to the room and persuade her back into the master bedroom. But he hadnt. In fact he hadnt made love to her since, which was unusual. When Warwick wanted sex, he could be quite ruthless.
Clearly, he hadnt wanted sex this past week. But shed wanted him to want it. Wanted him to want her.
If shed been a bolder type of girl, she would have attempted a seduction of her own. But playing the femme fatale was not Ambers style. Although not exactly shy, she never made the first movealthough shed never needed to where Warwick was concerned: he had more than enough moves for both of them.
By now, an increasingly desperate Amber knew she would have to do something to allay her growing fears that he was definitely growing bored with her. Her suggestion this morning over breakfast of a candlelit dinner at home seemed to have gone down well, with Warwick giving her a long lingering kiss at the door before going off to attend to his latest property development.
Not a hotel this time. Warwick wasnt interested in buying another Sydney hotel, despite his earlier acquisition now making a nice profit after hed put in a gym and a lounge bar, as shed suggested. This time hed chosen a night club up at the Cross, a rather run-down, seedy establishment that had definitely seen better days. But Warwick had seen potential in its position and was currently making the place over into the kind of high-class club that would attract the rich and famous with its luxurious ambience, wonderful food and top entertainment. Hed consulted Amber quite a lot about the refurbishing, complimenting her often over her various suggestions. In truth, she was as excited by the project as he was and often accompanied him to the site.
Not this past week, however. He hadnt offered to take her and she hadnt asked. Even if hed asked her today, she probably would have said no. Shed had other plans.
Amber had known it would take many hours to prepare for the evening ahead. Shed gone to the hairdresser first, after which shed bought herself a new dress, something extra pretty and feminine. Then shed had to shop for food, set the table, prepare the bedroom, and, finally, herself.
Oh, yes, Amber thought ruefully as her eyes cleared to rake over her reflection. Shed spent hours on herself, making sure that she looked exactly as Warwick liked her to look.
On the surface, her appearance hadnt changed much since the first day theyd met. Her hairstyle was exactly the same, though shed given in to Warwicks request to have her honey colour lightened to a cool, creamy blonde. And it did look classier somehow. Her eyebrows were more finely plucked these days, and the makeup she now wore was extremely expensive, not from the supermarket ranges that she used to buy. Although she couldnt see all that much difference, despite the time it took to apply everything. Maybe the lipsticks stayed on a little longer and the mascara was definitely waterproof.
Her figure was still basically the same, longer workouts in the gym ensuring that all the restaurant food shed devoured over the past ten months hadnt settled on her thighs or her stomach. Slightly taller than average, Amber had been blessed with a naturally slim body, yet enough curves to attract male attention.
Of course, her wardrobe had changed dramatically, Warwick insisting that she allow him to dress her the way a woman of her exquisite beauty should be dressed. He always called her a woman, never a girl. Shed been powerless to resist his complimentsas shed been powerless to resist himand now had a walk-in robe full of designer clothes; something for every possible occasion.
Nothing too sexy, though. Warwick said that true sexiness was what was hidden, not what was displayed.
A shiver trickled down Ambers spine when she thought about what was hidden under the softly feminine Orsini original she was wearing.
The long-awaited sound of her cell phone ringing had her throwing her hairbrush down and racing back out into the living room, where she thought shed left it. But the sound wasnt coming from there. Had she left the handset out on the balcony? She didnt think she had.
And then she remembered.
The kitchen!
Amber prayed for it to keep on ringing as she bolted for the kitchen, wishing that the rooms in this place werent quite so big.
At last she snatched the phone up into her hands, sweeping it up to her ear and saying, Thank heavens you didnt hang up, rather breathlessly at the same time.
Er its Mum, Amber. Not who you thought it was.
Amber suppressed a groan of dismay. Thank goodness she had a call waiting facility or shed go stark raving bonkers, having to talk to her mother when Warwick might be trying to contact her.
Hi, Mum, she said much more calmly than she was feeling. Whats up?
Her mother rarely rang her these days, their relationship having become strained since the day shed announced that shed quit her job, broken off with Cory and moved in with her billionaire boss.
Amber could well understand why her family didnt approve of her actions and shed finally given up trying to justify what shed done. Because there was no justification. She couldnt even use love as an excuse. Thered been no love back then, just lust. Though she preferred to think of it as passionthe kind of passion that was as powerful as it was impossible to describe, especially to your mother.
It had been quite a few months before Amber realised shed actually fallen in love with Warwick. Up till then shed been so blinded by her desire for the man that shed been unaware of the deepening of her emotional attachment. The illumination of her true feelings had happened with all the suddenness and force of a bolt of lightning. Theyd been staying at a resort in far North Queensland one weekend late last summer, when Warwick had decided to go bungee-jumping. Shed refused to participate herself but had gone along to watch, knowing it was better on her nerves to accompany Warwick on his thrill-seeking activities rather than stay behind and worry. Something had gone wrong with the length of the rope and his head had almost hit the rocks below. Amber had been absolutely horrified, both by his near miss and the realisation of her love.
Up till then, shed convinced herselfperhaps as a form of self-protectionthat she wouldnt be heartbroken when her time with Warwick was up. After all, broken hearts were for people who truly loved each other. Shed told herself repeatedly that going back to the real world would be difficult, but she would survive.
Suddenly, with Warwicks near-death experience, Amber saw what her life would be like without him. The wool was violently pulled from her eyes and she saw with painful clarity that shed been fooling herself, big time.
She did love him. Not just truly, but madly and very very deeply.
But she certainly didnt say as much to Warwick, whod made it clear right from the start that love was no more on his agenda than marriage and children. Quietly, however, like any typical female, Amber had begun to harbour the hope that she might be the exception to that rule as well; that one day hed discover that hed fallen madly in love with her too and wanted to keep her for ever. But that hope was rapidly fading.
Something strange has happened regarding Kates will, her mother announced, cutting into her thoughts.
Oh? What? She left everything to Dad, didnt she?
Who else? Aunt Kate had been a spinster and Ambers fathers only sibling.
She did in her old will. But it seemed she made a new will, witnessed by those two friends of hers. Max and Tara Richmond. You know who I mean, dont you?
Yes, of course. Amber had first met the Richmonds on Christmas day two years ago, when Christmas dinner had been held at Aunt Kates place.
Max Richmond was the owner of the Royale chain of international hotels, including the Regency Royale in Sydney, but had semi-retired to the Central Coast after his marriage. He and his wife were good friends of her Aunt Kate. They were a very glamorous-looking couple, with two amazingly well-behaved children: a darling little boy named Stevie and a very pretty blonde baby named Jasmine, who just sat in her stroller and smiled at everyone.
Amber recalled thinking on more than one occasion that they seemed the perfect family.
You may or may not have noticed, her mother said, but the Richmonds werent at Kates funeral last week.
No, I didnt notice. Shed been too upset to notice anything much.
They were overseas at the time of Kates death and didnt learn about it till they returned home yesterday. Anyway, to cut a long story short, they immediately got in touch with us to let us know that they were in possession of a new will, made just after Easter this year. In it, Kate has left her superannuation policy to your father, but her home and all its contents go to you.
What? But thats not right. I dont deserve it!
Whether you deserve it or not is not the point, her mother said archly. Kates bed and breakfast is now legally yours.
Amber blinked with shock. Her aunts B & B was situated a stones throw from Wamberal Beach, a much-sought-after location during the warmer months of the year. Any seaside town within a couple of hours drive from Sydney was never lacking for guests, especially during the school holidays. Aunt Kate had made a good living for herself over the years, though shed wound the business down a lot lately, because of her age. She didnt even have a website, relying on past customers and word of mouth for guests, plus the sign that stood at the entrance to her driveway. Even if it wasnt a going concern as a B & B any more, the house would still be worth close to a million dollars.
How does Dad feel about this? Amber asked worriedly. Is he upset?
He was at first. Not because he wanted the place himself. As you know, weve done very well with our fencing business over the last few years and were not wanting for money. But we both thought Tom and Tim should have been included in Kates will. Yet when your father spoke to them, they said they didnt mind at all. They actually seemed very pleased for you. They pointed out that they werent close to Kate the way you were. They didnt visit her or love her the way you did. Of course, both my boys have very good jobs, her mother said proudly. They dont need a helping hand. Unlike you.
What do you mean by that? Amber snapped, hurt by the pride that her mother always voiced in Tom and Tim. Doreen Roberts was one of those women who doted on her sons and largely ignored her only daughter. Ambers father was just the same. It was no wonder her sole ambition in life had been to leave home and make a family of her own, one where the love was shared around equally.
Were all worried about you, Amber, living with that heartless man. Kate was especially worried. I have a suspicion she knew she didnt have long to live, and changed her will in your favour to throw you a lifeline, so to speak. At least youll have a home and a job when that mans finished with you. Which, if he runs true to form, will be any day now.
You dont know that, Amber threw at her mother before she could think better of it.
Thats where youre wrong, dear. I know quite a lot about Warwick Kincaid and none of its very complimentary. He might be successful in his business dealings, but his personal life is another matter. Its a case of like father, like son.
Meaning?
His father was a notorious womaniser who hung himself after losing millions at a casino, according to the inquest.
Amber was truly shocked. Warwick had told her that his father had died unexpectedly at fifty-one, but shed just assumed it was from a heart attack or a stroke. Hed said nothing about suicide.
His wife divorced him soon after their only child was born, her mother rattled on, the price of her freedom being that she had to give up custody of her son. At the time, James Kincaid was one of the richest bankers in England with lots of power and influence. Its all there to read on the Internet if you ever want to look it up.
I dont have to, Mum. I know all about Warwicks family background. Which was an exaggeration of the highest order. Warwick was a man who lived in the here and now. He rarely talked about his past life. Neither did he ask her about hers. Hed told her a few brief details just before Christmas last year when shed enquired about his family. She did know about the divorce and that his motherfrom whom Warwick remained estrangedwas an actress of sorts. She knew his mother had never remarried, so he didnt have any half-brothers or -sisters. She knew nothing of his fathers womanising, or his suicide.
Then you must know that your boyfriends a womaniser as well, her mother swept on waspishly. With a mistress left behind in every country hes lived in. Its a different country each year: France, Spain, Italy, Turkey, Egypt, India, China, Vietnam And now Australia. Next year hell probably hop over to New Zealand, then on to the Americas. Hes an adventurer, Amber. And a gambler, just like his father. Maybe not at cards or roulette, but with his life. He does dangerous things.
Yes, I do know that, Mum, Amber said ruefully. Bungee-jumping and heli-skiing werent her lovers only thrill-seeking activities. Warwick liked to drive fast cars and boats. He liked everything that smacked of speed and risk. Please, can we stop this conversation right now? Youre not telling me anything I dont already know. Okay, so she hadnt known the detailed itinerary of his past love life, but shed been warned about his womanising reputation right from the start, both by Jill and Warwick himself.
And still, you stay with him, her mother said with incredulity in her voice.
I love him, Mum.
It was the first time Amber had said the words out loud to anyone other than herself.
I very much doubt it, her mother snapped. Youre just infatuated with his looks and his lifestyle.
Youre wrong, Mum. I do love him, Amber insisted hotly. And I wont leave him. Not unless he asks me to.
Her mother sighed. Theres nothing more to be said on that subject, then. So what are you going to do about Kates place? You cant just leave it empty indefinitely. Youll have to do something with it.
Could I rent it out, do you think? I mean as a holiday house? She didnt want to sell it. Not straight away.
I suppose so. But youll have to find yourself a reliable agent. And soon. Your father went up there last weekend and mowed the lawns and watered the garden but you cant expect him to keep on doing that. The place is your responsibility now.
Ambers heart jumped when she heard the familiar sound of the front door being opened. Warwick was home at last. Thank heavens! She was beginning to worry that he might have had an accident.
Mum, Im sorry, but I have to go now. Ill come over tomorrow and pick up the keys. Will you be home?
Yes. But only till twelve. I have a hairdressing appointment at twelve-thirty.
Ill be there before then. Bye.
Amber tossed the phone back down on the granite counter-top and hurried out of the kitchen, her heart thudding behind her ribs in a maddening mixture of excitement and annoyance.
Just the sight of him tipped her emotions more towards excitement. Warwick was still the most handsome man shed ever seen, with a strongly masculine face, a well-shaped head, sexy blue eyes, and an even sexier mouth. Combine that with a body to die for and an English accent that could cut glass and you had a man whod give James Bond a run for his money. In fact, he would make an excellent James Bond in Ambers opinion, his suave man-about-town fa?ade hiding a ruthless inner core. He wasnt totally heartless, as her mother had said. But he was extremely formidable.
It took courage to confront Warwick with anything, even his tardiness. Normally, Amber forgave his tendency to be late for things.
But not this time.
Where on earth have you been? she demanded to know. You knew I was cooking a special dinner for us tonight. Why didnt you call me? I left enough messages on that damned phone of yours!
CHAPTER TWO
WARWICK closed the front door behind him, slipping the security chain into place before turning his attention back to his understandably upset girlfriend.
How exquisitely beautiful she looked in that glorious pink dress! Beautiful and desirable. Not that it was a sexy garment, by any means. There was no provocative dcolletage on display. The neckline was modestly scooped, and the simple flowing style skimmed rather than clung to her curves, the handkerchief hemline reaching down past her knees.
But never before had a girl turned Warwick on the way Amber couldso damned effortlessly. She didnt have to flirt, or do any of the boldly seductive things his previous women had done. She only had to be in the same room and his hormones jumped to attention.
Suddenly, Warwick wasnt sure if he could continue with the plan hed started putting into action recently, the one where he showed himself to be the ruthless man he actually was. Much easier to give up on that ideahowever perversely noble it wasapologise profusely for being late and do what his body was urging him to do: ravish her all night long.
The temptation was powerful. But soas Warwick kept discovering to his surprisewas his conscience. For some time now it had troubled him deeply. Thanks to that wretched aunt of Ambers.
Of course, he himself had known right from the start that it had been wrong to take a girl like Amber to his bed. Shed been too young, too sweet and too sensitive.
But he just hadnt been able to resist her. The chemistry between them had been electric, right from the first moment theyd set eyes on each other.
Just one night, hed told himself at the time. To see how it would feel to make love to someone wholesome. Someone who blushed when you looked deep into her eyes; someone whose attraction for him shocked her enough to make her resign.
Well, hed found out what it was like and, come the next morning, he hadnt been able to let her go.
But now the time had come for him to do so.
Time to be cruel to be kind.
Please dont start sounding like a wife, Amber, he said coldly as he strode into the room, loosening his tie and undoing the top button of his shirt as he headed for the built-in bar in the corner. I texted you that Id be late, he threw at her after selecting a glass and reaching for the whisky decanter. For pitys sake, woman, dont nag.
I I dont think its nagging to demand politeness, she returned in a small, almost crushed voice.
He should not have glanced up at her, not then. Not when her soft blue eyes looked so wounded.
Hell on earth, he couldnt do this. Not tonight. That would be just too cruel.
Youre right, he said more gently. Sorry, sweetheart. Im a bit wound up. Had to sort out a few problems with one of the building contractors. Thats who I was with all this time, he lied. Hed actually been sitting in a bar in town all by himself, nursing a whisky for two long hours till he was rudely late. What say I go shower and change into something more comfortable whilst you rustle up dinner? he suggested. Its not spoiled, is it?
No. Immediately, her dulled eyes glowed with happiness, sending a dagger of guilt plunging into his own wretchedly dark heart.
Oh, Warwick, Warwick, he thought almost despairingly. How are you going to get yourself out of this mess? The girl loves you. Cant you see that?
Yes, of course I can see it, came a frustrated voice from within.
It wasnt the first time this realisation had jumped into Warwicks head. That day hed gone bunjee-jumping, for instance, when the damned rope had gone awry and he hadnt been killed. More was the pity. Ambers feelings had been written all over her face. Shed been trembling with shock and relief when he was brought back up, unharmed.
Unfortunately, being loved the way Amber loved himwith such sweet sinceritywas as powerful as the most addictive drug. Giving up the way she made him feel was going to take a massive act of will, one that Warwick didnt think he was capable of this evening. Knowing she wanted him to make love to her after dinner was weakening his resolve to end their relationship.
Maybe it was time to tell her the truth about himself, to force Amber to face the fact that there was no future with him.
Could he do that? Should he?
Unfortunately, revealing his genetic flaw and all its appalling inevitabilities might not bring about the desired result. If Warwick had learned one thing about Ambers character during the last ten months, it was that she was as compassionate as she was passionate. She would become visibly upset whenever she saw those ads about poor starving children, and could only be soothed when he promised to make regular donations to whatever charity was canvassing for help. Stories about neglected animals inevitably brought similar distress, as did reports on the news about more bombs killing innocent women and children in war-torn countries. Warwick had taken to putting a box of tissues at the ready by the sofa to mop up her tears.
Finding out what awaited her lover in the future might send her running, not in the other direction, but right into his arms.
It was a risk Warwick decided he could not take. He would have to find some other way to end their relationship.
Is that your glass of wine over there? He nodded towards the nearly full glass that was sitting on the side table next to the box of tissues.
Oh, yes, it is. I was having a drink earlier when I was waiting for you to come home.
Another stab of guilt. Still, he was here now.
Bet I can guess what it is, he said. A Sauvignon Blanc from the Marlborough region.
She smiled as she walked over to pick up the glass. You know me too well.
Yes, he thought as he dropped a few cubes of ice in his glass then slurped in some whisky. I do. And you deserve better than me. You deserve a man wholl marry you, give you children and grow old with you.
I cant do any of those things.
Warwick scowled as he lifted the glass to his lips, irritated suddenly by his maudlin thoughts. What good did they do? Hed always been a realist, and the reality of his life was that he couldnt offer Amber any more than hed originally offered her.
But damn it all, surely the time shed spent living with him hadnt been totally wasted. Shed travelled a lot and learned a lot. Shed socialised with some of the worlds most successful people, been dressed by the worlds most fashionable designers, stayed in the worlds most luxurious resorts.
Some women would kill for what Amber had experienced during these past ten months.
Unfortunately, Amber wasnt one of those women. Warwick knew she didnt give a fig about any of those things. All she wanted was his love and his ring on her finger.
Not that shed told him so. Not once.
Her aunt Kate had told him, last Easter at a family barbecue at her home that Amber had dragged him along to.
What an old tartar shed been. But shed obviously loved her niece and wanted to see her happy.
You do realise, Kate had snapped at him when Amber had left them to go to the bathroom, that Amber was practically engaged when she met you. To a perfectly nice boy who would have given her the only things shes wanted since she was knee high to a grasshopper: a loving husband and a family of her own. Two things youll never give her, Warwick Kincaid.
The old dragon probably could have said a lot more but didnt get the opportunity.
Shame on you, shed hissed under her breath as Amber had walked back towards them.
That had been three months ago. Warwick hadnt told Amber what her aunt had said. Hadnt asked her about the man shed been on the verge of marrying. He certainly hadnt embraced the undeniable shame the womans forceful words had momentarily evoked. Instead, hed gone on wallowing in Ambers warmth and passion, telling himself that he hadnt forced her to choose him over that other fellow. Hed never forced her to do a single thing. She had free will, didnt she? She wanted to be with him.
But gradually, the shame had resurfaced. So had his conscience, something that hed kept buried for a long time. In hindsight, his plan to stop acting like a besotted bridegroom and start showing his true colours had not been well thought out. He hadnt anticipated the hurt that his abrupt change in behaviour would bring her. Hadnt anticipated his own level of self-disgust.
Far better that the break be clean and swift.
When the time came, that was.
Her walking over and bending forward to pick up her glass of wine showed him that that time definitely wasnt tonight, his flesh stirring as he imagined how she would look doing that without that dress on.
Dinner wont be ready for at least fifteen minutes, she said as she straightened. I havent cooked the rice yet.
What are we having?
Beef stroganoff. Her free hand lifted to push her long hair back from where it had fallen over one of her shoulders. I wanted something plain for a change.
Warwicks flesh stiffened as he noted the telling outline of erect nipples under the pink silk. She was as frustrated as he was, by the look of things. Understandable considering thered been no sex this past week, the longest time hed abstained from touching her since their first night together. It had been damned difficult. But at the time hed been on a mission to make her hate him; to make her give him the flick, instead of the other way around.
Now that that idea had been tossed out of the window, Warwick had no weapons against the desires that were, at this very moment, taking dark possession of him. Various erotic scenarios filled his mind, none of which involved waiting till after dinner to satisfy his already clamouring flesh. His hunger had nothing to do with food. It was primal and sexual and urgent.
Ive changed my mind, he said abruptly.
About what?
About eating.
She looked confused. You dont want any dinner?
Not yet.
Then what do you want?
I want you to take your dress off.
Ambers eyes flung wide. What?
Warwick appreciated that hed never ordered her to take her clothes off for him. Not even in the bedroom. Why now? he wondered, even as he banished any qualms and surrendered to the temptation to exercise his sexual power over her.
You heard me, he said in a voice that was as hard as his erection.
But but people might see me, she stammered. From out on the water.
Not up close, he countered. Come now, Amber, youve nothing to be shy about. You have a glorious body. Do you need a little help, is that it?
CHAPTER THREE
AMBER just stared at him.
What I need, she suddenly felt like screaming, is a little respect.
But no words came from her mouthher rapidly drying mouth.
She stood there, rooted to the spot, as he started walking towards her, bringing his drink with him, lifting it to his lips and sipping it slowly. Their eyes met over the rim of the glass, his shocking her with their coldness. Or was that desire glittering in their ice-blue depths?
She couldnt be sure. Hed run hot and cold ever since hed come home, leaving her hopelessly bewildered.
Amber told herself to move. To do something, say something.
Anything!
But her tongue was as useless as her legs.
She remained frozen as he moved around behind her, a soft gasp breaking from her lips when he pushed aside her long curtain of hair, draping it over her left shoulder before bending his mouth to her exposed right ear.
But it wasnt his lips that made her shiver. It was the fear of what she was about to allow and enjoy.
Dont, she heard herself whisper just as his tongue tip dipped into the shell of her ear.
Dont what? he whispered a few seconds later.
Dont do this to me
But you want me to, he murmured, and nibbled at her ear lobe. This is what tonight was all about. Not food.
No, she choked out. Not entirely.
His laugh was low and sexy. Yes. Entirely.
She stiffened when he ran the zipper down past her waist, a shudder following when he stroked the cold glass he was holding down her spine.
You want this as much as I do, he said thickly as he pushed the sides of her dress off her shoulders.
It pooled around her feet in a silky pink puddle, leaving her wearing nothing but her pink high heels.
This wasnt the first time shed left off her underwear. But it was the first time shed felt ashamed of having done so.
Im exactly what Aunt Kate said I am, Amber accepted despairingly as she stood there, naked, before her wealthy lovers gaze. Not a proper girlfriend or a much loved partner, but a mistress, a kept woman. Kept for nothing but her masters sexual pleasure.
Her stomach contracted when he moved around to look at her from the front, her feelings of shame at war with those other wickedly powerful emotions he could so easily evoke. Not just desire but needthe need to be caressed, and kissed, and filled.
She closed her eyes, blotting out the way his glittering blue eyes were gobbling her up. Perversely, her not being able to see him only increased her awareness of her own appalling excitement. Every muscle in her body tensed up, waiting for his touch. Yearning for it. Dying for it.
His breath on the nape of her neck told her that hed moved behind her again. He must have put his drink down too, both his hands free to slide up and down her arms, which immediately broke into goose bumps.
Do you have any idea what you do to me? he murmured as he pressed himself against her naked back, his mouth hovering just above her right ear.
No, came her shaky reply. She only knew what he did to her, and what hed done. Reduced to this this pitiful state where shame and pride were no match for the pleasure of his lovemaking.
Though this wasnt lovemaking tonight. This was just sexraw, unadulterated sex.
If I were a prince in the Middle Ages, he whispered as he took her hands and lifted them high above her head, I would keep you just like this locked in a dungeon with nothing to do but wait for me to come to you.
She shuddered at the image hed created.
Why it excited her so much she could not fathom. She should have been repulsed. Instead, she was shaking with excitement.
Would you like that? he demanded to know, his breathing growing heavier as he pressed himself even harder against her bare buttocks.
Yes, she choked out.
His naked groan betrayed a level of need possibly even greater than her own.
What on earth am I going to do with you? he growled.
Amber moaned, having reached that point where pride and shame had become totally irrelevant. She needed Warwick inside her, right then and there, regardless of the fact that she was standing in the middle of a well-lit, glass-walled living room, less than a hundred metres away from where boats full of tourists were enjoying evening dinner cruises on Sydney Harbour.
Please, she heard herself practically beg as she moved her legs wantonly apart.
Warwick heard the wild desperation in her voice, felt the uncontrollable excitement that had taken possession of her. He should have felt triumphant. Clever old Warwick, knowing exactly what buttons to press and words to say to seduce her into a state of total surrender.
Why, then, did he suddenly feel bitterly ashamed of himself?
The answer was obvious.
Because she loves you, you bastard. Shes not some cheap whore who doesnt care what you do to her.
But even as he told himself all this Warwick was unzipping his trousers. His conscience kept screaming at him not to, but Amber wasnt the only one whod reached the point of no return.
He groaned as he slid into her, wallowing in the feel of her flesh enclosing his like a tightening fist. She made some sound, a moan perhaps, though not of pain, but of pleasure. It was impossible to stop now. With his right hand splayed firmly over her stomach, and his left cupping her right breast, he began to move his hips.
Not so fast, Warwick, he warned himself as his body immediately surged towards a decidedly premature release. His hips, however, refused to obey him. They jerked back and forth with an urgency that would not be denied, his outspread fingers pressing upwards on her belly, lifting her buttocks up higher against his abdomen, the angle affording him a deeper penetration.
Warwick grimaced as he felt the hot blood rushing along his veins. He was going to come! Hell on earth, he hadnt come this fast in decades!
Ambers suddenly shattering apart in his arms was a huge relief to his pride, allowing him to abandon what little control he had left.
He cried out, holding her tight against him as he ejaculated with the ferocity of an erupting volcano.
She shuddered with him, the contractions of her orgasm more intense, he thought, than ever before. The fantasy hed painted about keeping her imprisoned in a dungeon had really turned her on. So much so that shed forgotten who might be watching what they were up to.
You should do this more often, Warwick. Play erotic games with her.
Up till now hed hardly touched the sides of what hed learned over many years of hedonistic behaviour. There was so much more he could show her, and do with her.
The only question was should he?
As much as Warwick was tempted by the thought of becoming Ambers tutor in the erotic arts, he knew that the more imaginative and adventurous practiceswhilst wildly excitingcarried a degree of danger; the danger of corruption.
The last thing he wanted to do was corrupt Amber. Pleasure her yes. Satisfy her yes. Corrupt her? No.
He would not destroy her basic innocence, he decided as he gently withdrew, then scooped her up into his arms. Such innocence was too precious. She was too precious.
He was going to miss her terribly, he thought as he carried her into the bedroom. But not tonight. For now she was still his.
He wouldnt think about the future. Tonight was for nothing but pleasure.
Hers.
His.
But mostly hers.
CHAPTER FOUR
WHEN Amber woke the next morning, all her fears that her relationship with Warwick was coming to an end in the near future had been firmly pushed aside. She smiled as she glanced over at his naked body spreadeagled across the satin sheets, his arms and legs flung wide, his chest rising and falling in the slow, deep rhythm of the truly spent.
Amber could well understand his exhaustion. Hed been insatiable with her last night, showing her with his tireless lovemaking that he was in no way bored with her. It still amazed Amber how well he knew a womans body and how to uncover a womans secret desires. Thered been a timepre Warwickwhen she hadnt been that fussed about sex. But, from the first night shed spent with Warwick, shed become a virtual slave to the cravings he evoked and satisfied, oh, so well. Amber could not imagine living without the pleasure of his lovemaking could not imagine living without him!
But you might have to one day, whispered the voice of reason as she slipped out of the rumpled bed and headed for the bathroom.
It was a disturbing thought. What would she do when and if that happened?
Amber grimaced, clinging to the hope that maybe it wouldnt. Maybe her dream of Warwick falling in love with her and asking her to marry him was still a possibility. There were times, like last night, when she was confident that he had. There was love in his lovemaking: a tenderness and consideration that didnt equate with the cold-blooded womaniser that her mother had more or less described him as last night.
Oh, my goodness! Amber exclaimed, bolting back to the bedroom and checking the time on the digital bedside clock.
Twenty to eleven! she gasped aloud.
She immediately raced over to shake Warwick on the shoulder.
Warwick! Wake up! Wake up! I need you.
He lifted one heavy eyelid, giving her a droll if bleary look. You have to be joking, Amber, he drawled in that cultured voice of his. I would have thought youd had enough for at least twenty-four hours.
Not for that, silly! she said. I need you to drive me over to Mums place before midday, then up to Wamberal. To Aunt Kates place.
His second eyelid opened much more quickly, his sleepy expression replaced by bewilderment. Run that by me again, would you? I mean Im absolutely sure that your aunt Kate is no longer in residence. So why are we driving up to her place?
She left it to me, Amber announced rather baldly. In her will. A new one which shed made recently and which has only just come to light. Mum rang me about it last night but I forgot to tell you. No, dont start asking me endless questions right now, she raced on when he sat up abruptly with his mouth already opening. We havent the time. We have to be out of here in about fifteen minutes flat if were going to get to Carlingford before midday. I promised to pick up the keys to Aunt Kates before Mum leaves to go to the hairdressers.
Amber took it as testimony to Warwicks caring that he didnt argue, or tell her that he had more important things to do that day. He just got up and got on with what shed asked. Just after eleven they were zooming through the harbour tunnel, though Amber was still a little tense that they might not make it in time.
Ill give Mum a ring once were out of the tunnel, she said, and fished her mobile out of her handbag. Let her know my estimated time of arrival.
So tell me, Warwick asked with a brief glance her way. In your aunts new willare you the only beneficiary?
No. She left her superannuation policy to Dad. But her house and contents go to me alone.
Hmm. Ill bet your mothers somewhat peeved at you being left your aunts place, rather than her precious boys.
Ambers head swung round at this quite intuitive remark.
Did you think I didnt notice the way she favoured your brothers over you? he swept on before she could say a single word. Your father, too. I didnt have to be in their home for more than five minutes to see the lie of the land. Why do you think I couldnt wait to get you out of there on Christmas Day? Im not good at keeping my mouth shut when Im bearing witness to such an injustice, especially against someone I care about.
Amber didnt know what to say. This was the closest Warwick had ever come to saying that he loved her. She was so touched, a huge lump formed in her throat.
I I didnt realise you noticed, she mumbled at last.
I noticed all right. The only reason I didnt say something was because it was Christmas, plus I didnt want to give your parents more reason to put you down. Theyd already made it patently obvious that they didnt approve of your relationship with me. Not that they said so to my face. I would have thought more of them if they had. Your aunt Kate was a bit of dragon, but at least she loved you enough to give me a piece of her mind.
She did?
Indeed she did, he said drily.
Kate had had a reputation for speaking her mind. And a reputation for being a bit of a man hater. Though she hadnt hated all men. Shed liked Max Richmond and had always sung his praises. But then it was highly unusual, Amber supposed, for a billionaire to give up his jet-setting lifestyle to get married and raise a family away from the spotlight of wealth and fame.
What did she say? Amber asked, though she feared she already knew the answer.
Warwick shrugged his shoulders. The usual. I was a selfish you-know-what who should be hung, drawn and quartered for taking a sweet young thing like you as my mistress.
Oh, Amber choked out.
Warwicks head snapped round. Youre not crying, are you?
No, she denied, but shakily.
You are, he said with a sigh. I cant stand it when you cry.
I dont cry all that often, Amber said defensively.
You have to be kidding, sweetheart. You cry at the news, and at ads, and during all those soppy movies you like to watch. I put a box of tissues by the sofa to mop up your tears.
Theyre not real tears. Im talking about real tears. Shed only wept a few times since moving in with Warwick. Once, when her mother was highly critical of her relationship. And then, when shed heard that her aunt Kate had died. Oh, and yes, after her argument with Warwick last week.
But he hadnt been witness to that, had he? He hadnt even been in the same room.
Tears dont solve anything, you know, he growled.
Theyre not meant to solve anything, she shot back, dabbing the moisture from her eyes. They just happen.
I dont like the way women use tears to get what they want.
I dont.
No, he said, if a little reluctantly. You dont.
Lets not argue, Warwick, she said, worried that the happiness shed felt this morning was beginning to disintegrate.
Only if you promise not to cry.
She smiled over at him. See? Ive already stopped.
What about later when you get to your aunts place?
Ill do my best not to. But she rather suspected she would shed a few tears then. She hadnt been there since her aunt died, the wake having been held at a local club.
Mmm. I think I should have given you the car for the day. Let you drive yourself up to Wamberal.
But I want you with me. I need your advice on what I should do with Aunt Kates place. Besides, I dont much like driving your car.
What? You dont like driving a Ferrari? Are you insane?
I dont like speed the way you do. Promise me you wont go fast when we get on the expressway. Theres no reason to. We have all the time in the world.
Warwick almost laughed. All the time in the world was something he certainly did not have. Which meant he didnt want to spend what precious time he did have with her at Wamberal where she was sure to get weepy over her aunt all over again. Next thing he knew, shed want to keep the damned place. Maybe even go up there on weekends.
She wanted his advice? Warwick already knew what that advice would be. Put the property in the hands of a good real estate agent to sell, then come back to Sydney with him. Hed already decided he couldnt be without her just yet. Last night had shown him that. He hadnt been able to get enough of her. But maybe soon hed find the strength to end things. Until then, however, he aimed to keep things exactly as they were, with her by his side, and in his bed.
Ill wait for you in the car, he said when they finally arrived at her parents home in Carlingford just before midday. Got a few things to attend to. And he picked up his BlackBerry.
Amber didnt argue with him. Quite frankly, the last thing she wanted was him by her side when her mother answered the door. She climbed out of the car and hurried up the steep front path to the equally steep front steps. Running up them, she reached the front porch and was about to ring the bell when the door was wrenched open and her mother stood there, looking very annoyed.
Id almost given up on you coming, she said sourly.
But I rang you from the car to say Id be here.
I dont know why you had to leave it to the last minute, her mother snapped. Its not as though you work.
Amber could think of nothing to say to that. It was true, after all.
Im sorry, Mum, she heard herself apologising the way shed been doing all her life. We had a late night and we er slept in. If youll just give me the keys Ill be on my way.
Doreen sniffed her distaste as she swung away and picked up two sets of keys from the nearby hall table. Here they are, she said, and handed them over. The second set belongs to Kates car. Thats yours too, it seems.
Really? Amber could not help feeling pleased at this news. Shed only ever owned one car, a rust-bucket shed bought when shed been eighteen and had taken a second job as a waitress and needed wheels to get to and from work at night. Naturally, her parents had refused to let her use either of their vehicles. Neither had they offered to subsidise the purchase of one for her as they had with the boys.
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, (https://www.litres.ru/miranda-lee/not-a-marrying-man-39922202/) .
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Miranda Lee
He doesnt do for ever British billionaire Warwick Kincaid likes to take risks though they dont include marriage and children. Twelve months is his limit when it comes to relationships. Warwick asks beautiful Sydney receptionist Amber Roberts to move into his luxury penthouse, and she dares to hope he might have changedBut after theyve been together ten months Warwick starts to act cold and withdrawn. Is Ambers time up, just like the women before her? The chemistry between them remains white-hot, and she finds it hard to believe that her time with Warwick is really over
Just one night, hed told himself at the time.
To see how it would feel to make love to someone wholesome. Someone who blushed when you looked deep into her eyes. Someone whose attraction for him shocked her enough to make her resign.
Well, hed found out what it was likeand, come the next morning, he hadnt been able to let her go.
But now the time had come for him to do so.
Time to be cruel to be kind.
Please dont start sounding like a wife, Amber, he said coldly.
About the Author
MIRANDA LEE is Australian, and lives near Sydney. Born and raised in the bush, she was boarding-school-educated, and briefly pursued a career in classical music, before moving to Sydney and embracing the world of computers. Happily married, with three daughters, she began writing when family commitments kept her at home. She likes to create stories that are believable, modern, fast-paced and sexy. Her interests include meaty sagas, doing word puzzles, gambling and going to the movies.
NOT A
MARRYING MAN
MIRANDA LEE
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
PROLOGUE
Excerpts from Amber Robertss diary during September of her twenty-fifth year.
Tuesday
What a tiresome day! Arrived at work to find that the hotel had been sold and the new owner would be visiting the premises mid-morning. Hes a British businessman called Warwick Kincaid. According to Jill, hes a rather infamous entrepreneur with fingers in lots of pies and a reputation for not holding on to anything for longhis girlfriends as well as his many and varied commercial ventures. How she knew all that I have no idea. But then Im not addicted to gossip mags the way Jill is. Naturally, everyone went into a flap, wondering if their jobs were safe. Not me so much since Im not all that wrapped in mine. Though I dont want to lose it just at the moment. Hard to save up a deposit on a house without a salary. Anyway, Warwick Kincaid never showed up in the end. Too busy, we were eventually told. Not sure if thats good news or bad news. Hes supposed to reschedule for tomorrow.
Wednesday
Well, he showed up this time. Seriously wish he hadnt. What can I say? Hes as up himself as I imagined. But younger. Late thirties, maybe forty. Hes also the best-looking man Ive ever met. I couldnt stop staring at him. He noticed of course. And he stared right back. Ive never blushed so much in all my life. He didnt stay all that long but hes coming back tomorrow to talk to all the staff, one at a time, on a mission to find out why a stylish boutique hotel situated in one of the best areas of Sydney isnt turning over a profit. His words, not mine. Jill said afterwards that he fancied me and that I should watch myself. I laughed and told her not to be so silly, that I was in love with Cory and no man, no matter how tall, dark and handsomeor richwould get to even first base with me. But you know what? When Cory picked me up tonight, I looked at him and didnt feel anything like the buzz I felt today when I looked at Warwick Kincaid. Later, I was relieved when Cory said he wanted an early night. It sounds crazy, but meeting Warwick Kincaid has made me wonder if Im really in love with Cory. Maybe Im just in love with the idea of getting married and having the house and family of my own that Ive always wanted. Its a worry all right. Sos the way Ive been fussing over what Ill wear tomorrow. I have a feeling Im not going to sleep too well tonight. But I have to if I want to look beautiful in the morning. Oh, goodness, did I just think that? Maybe it would be better if I didnt sleep. Must go now. Have to do my nails and put a treatment in my hair.
Thursday
Im almost afraid to write down what happened today. Because if I do, it will become more real, more powerful, and even more disturbing. Not that anything really happened. I mean, he didnt make a pass at me or anything like that. He just talked to me about the hotel, the same way he talked to everyone else. Seemed happy with my suggestion that the hotel needed some more in-house facilities like a gym and a restaurant. At least a lounge bar where guests could relax and have a drink. On the surface our conversation was strictly business, but all the while those piercing blue eyes of his never left mine. Not for a second. And it wasnt just the way he stared at me. There was something else. I know it wasnt just me. It wasnt my imagination. Something was there, zapping back and forth across the desk that separated us. An electric charge that was both exciting and enervating. When our discussion was over and I had to stand up, I found that my legs had almost gone to jelly. Somehow I made it out of the office and back to the front desk where I slumped down into my chair. I felt faint. I still feel faint thinking about it. And all Ive done this evening is think about it. My whole world has been tilted on its axis. How can I get engaged to Cory now when I know that I dont love him? I mean, how could I love him but want to sleep with another man? And I do. I want to have sex with Warwick Kincaid. I cant believe I just admitted that, but whats the point of keeping a diary if you lie to it? So, yes, I want to sleep with Warwick Kincaid. But that isnt love, is it? Thats just lust. Can you be in love with one man and in lust with another? Maybe you can. What do I know? Ive never felt anything like this before. What I need is to talk to someone about it. Not with my girlfriends, though. Theyre all silly as wet hens when it comes to the opposite sex. Not Mum, either. Shed be dead shocked. She thinks Im a good girl. Which I thought I was too, till today. Maybe Aunt Kate. Shes seen a lot of life. Ill ring Aunt Kate tomorrow and ask her. Shell tell me how it is, warts and all. Yes, thats what Ill do.
Friday
Well, Warwick Kincaid came back again first thing this morning and totally ignored me, which I found to my disgust upset me terribly. I should have been grateful. Anyway, I was so annoyed with myself that by lunchtime I made the decision to resign. I knew I couldnt work for that man a minute longer. I waited till he was heading for home at the end of the day before I handed him the letter of resignation that Id typed up during my lunch hour. He read it straight away, then gave me the longest, most intense look. Of course I blushed again. Then he said fine, he accepted my resignation, after which he shocked me rigid by asking me out to dinner tonight. I know I should have said no. I know hes the kind of man who wants pretty young girls like me for one thing, and one thing only. But I didnt say no. I said yes. Because the shocking truth is that I want him for the same thing. Im not in love with him. Heavens, Im not sure I even like him. But Im going to end up in bed with him tonight. Id be a fool to think hes going to feed me then bring me straight home. On top of that, I have an awful feeling that going to bed with Warwick Kincaid is going to change my life in ways that I cant as yet imagine. Theres no point in ringing Aunt Kate now. She cant help me. No one can. I feel like crying. This is not what I want but I cant seem to help myself. Mum thinks Im going out with Cory tonight so she wont be worried if I dont come home. I always stay at Corys place on a Friday night. At least I did the right thing by ringing Cory and breaking up with him. I told him that Id met someone else and that I was sorry. He took the news rather well, I thought, which was of some comfort. But theres no going back now. Ive made my bed, so speak, and Ill just have to lie in it
CHAPTER ONE
July, ten months later
AMBERS teeth clenched hard in her jaw as she checked her phone for messages again. Still nothing from Warwick. She punched in his mobile number and was told for the umpteenth time that his phone was not available. She didnt leave a message. There was no point. Shed already left three, each one sounding more frustrated than the last.
When shed suggested a romantic dinner for two tonight rather than a restaurant meal, Warwick had promised to be home by seven-thirty. But then hed messaged her shortly before six saying hed been delayed and that he might be back a bit late, maybe by eight oclock.
It was now almost nine and still there was no sign of him. No more messages, either.
Surely you have time to call me, Amber muttered under her breath as she returned to the kitchen, threw her cell phone onto the black granite counter-top, then switched off the oven in which the already overdone beef stroganoff had been keeping warm.
At least she hadnt started cooking the rice. Maybe the meal was still salvageable. Though her own appetite had long gone.
Opening the oversized stainless-steel fridge, which never held all that much foodnot much point when they rarely ate at homeAmber reached for the bottle of New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc, which had become her favourite, and poured herself a glass. Carrying it with her and sipping at the same time, she made her way back through the dining room, grimacing as she passed the beautifully set table before heading for the balcony and the hopefully soothing effect of the water view.
Using her free hand, she slid open one of the glass doors that led out onto the huge curving balcony and that fronted the entire apartment, providing a spectacular view of Sydney Harbour. Unfortunately, it was freezing out there, the stiff breeze that came off the water quickly making a mess of Ambers long hair. Grimacing, she turned and hurried back into the temperature-controlled interior, shutting the glass door behind her. Shed forgotten for a moment that it was winter, Warwick always keeping the apartment pleasantly warm.
Putting her wine glass down on one of the glass-topped side tables that flanked the white leather sofa, Amber made her way across the plushly furnished living room and into the vast expanse of the master bedroom. Her chest tightened as she took in the turned-down bed, the cream satin sheets and the scented candles shed placed on the bedside tables, in anticipation of the evening ahead.
Bastard, she muttered, and marched on into the cream marble en suite bathroom where she took a brush out of the drawer on her side of the twin vanities and began attacking her ruffled hair with angry strokes.
It didnt take her long to put order into her hair which was easily managed, being long and straight with a blunt-cut fringe.
Her ruffled emotions, however, were not so easily controlled.
Amber could still remember the first time shed stood on this very spot, looking into this mirror, her blue eyes wide with excitement. It had been the night shed gone to dinner with Warwick, the night her life had changed for ever.
Hed taken her to a five-star restaurant first, where hed impressed her with the very best of food and wine, along with his highly entertaining conversation. Itd been impossible for a twenty-five-year-old girl whod only left Australia for family holidays in Bali and Fiji not to be impressed with this man whod been everywhere and done everything. Impossible not to be flattered by the fact that someone of his intelligence and status would choose to be with her: Amber Roberts, receptionist.
Afterwards, hed brought her back here, without bothering to make any excuses, his intentions perfectly clear to Amber as they had been from the moment hed asked her out.
Shed tried not to appear too blown away, either by his Italian sports car, or his multimillion-dollar Point Piper apartment, which hed bought two weeks earlier, fully furnished. But she was an ordinary working-class girl whod been brought up in the western suburbs of Sydney. She wasnt used to this kind of luxury living. She certainly wasnt used to this kind of man.
He hadnt just swept her off her feet and into his bed that night. Hed taken possession of her with a power and a passion that had left her, not only reeling, but ready to say yes to anything he wanted.
But what hed wanted had been slightly surprising. Shed feared, when shed woken in his king-sized bed the following morning, that that might be that. She was sure it would be a case of hasta la vista, baby.
Instead, hed pulled her to him, told her he was crazy about her and asked her to become his girlfriend. Not just in a casual relationship, either. He wanted her to move in with him, travel with him, be with him all the time. She wouldnt be able to work, of course. She had to be ready to accompany him at a moments notice. He travelled quite a lot, both for business and pleasure.
Shed been about to blindly say yes when hed qualified the terms of the relationship he was proposing.
Just so you dont get the wrong idea, hed added. I dont do marriage and children. And I dont do for ever. I have a notoriously low boredom threshold. Twelve months is usually my limit when it comes to any woman. Though with you, my sweet lovely Amber, I just might make an exception. To be honest, youre already one big exception. Up till now, Ive never asked a woman to live with me. I dare say its going to cost me dearly in the end, but theres something about you which I find totally irresistible. So what do you say, beautiful? Do you want to get aboard the Kincaid roller-coaster ride, or not?
She should still have said no, despite the seductive flattery hed included in what was really a totally appalling and extremely selfish proposition. But how did a girl say no to more of what shed experienced the night before? Amber had never known such excitement, or such pleasure. There were things Warwick knew about lovemaking that had quite blown her away. Hed been able to turn her on and keep her that way for hours, reducing her to total mush.
So of course shed said yes, and now here she was ten months later, still his live-in girlfriend. Or his mistress, as Aunt Kate had once caustically called her.
But for how much longer?
This was the third time lately, Amber conceded as she stared blankly into the vanity mirror, that Warwick had let her down. A couple of weeks ago, hed cancelled a weekend getaway to the Hunter Valley that shed been looking forward to, instead jetting off by himself to New Zealand with two of his business associates to go heliskiing, a high-risk, thrill-seeking, extremely dangerous sport that had recently cost other lives and that had left her worried sick all weekend. But his worst transgression, in her opinion, had been when hed refused to accompany her to Aunt Kates funeral last week, claiming hed had important business to attend to that day, then adding insult to injury by saying that the old duck hadnt liked him and he hadnt liked her, either!
Which was totally beside the point. Amber had been very fond of her aunt Kate and terribly upset by her aunts rather sudden death of a stroke. Shed only been seventy-two, hardly ancient.
It had been horrible, sitting in that church all by herself, then having to defend Warwicks absence afterwards. Her relationship with him had already alienated her from her family to a degree. Hed only accompanied her to two family gatherings during the time theyd been together, Christmas Day at her parents house in Carlingford, and then last Easter, to a family barbecue at her aunt Kates place up at Wamberal Beach on the Central Coast.
And whilst hed been quite polite to everyone, hed somehow made it obviousto her at leastthat hed been bored rigid. On both occasions theyd been the first to leave.
Ambers two older brothers hadnt pulled any punches last week when it had come to making forthright remarks about her wealthy lover not bothering to attend Aunt Kates funeral. Even Warwicks lending to her of his flashy red Ferrari for the drive up to Wamberal hadnt softened their disapproval over his absence.
And theyd been quite right. He should have gone with her. His claiming that hed had important business to attend to that day had just been an excuse. If hed cared about her at all, he would have made other arrangements and driven her to the funeral himself.
By the time Amber had arrived back home after the wake, she hadnt been able to contain her emotions, telling Warwick exactly what she thought of his lack of sensitivity and support, before flouncing off to sleep in one of the two guest bedrooms.
Shed been half expecting him to come to the room and persuade her back into the master bedroom. But he hadnt. In fact he hadnt made love to her since, which was unusual. When Warwick wanted sex, he could be quite ruthless.
Clearly, he hadnt wanted sex this past week. But shed wanted him to want it. Wanted him to want her.
If shed been a bolder type of girl, she would have attempted a seduction of her own. But playing the femme fatale was not Ambers style. Although not exactly shy, she never made the first movealthough shed never needed to where Warwick was concerned: he had more than enough moves for both of them.
By now, an increasingly desperate Amber knew she would have to do something to allay her growing fears that he was definitely growing bored with her. Her suggestion this morning over breakfast of a candlelit dinner at home seemed to have gone down well, with Warwick giving her a long lingering kiss at the door before going off to attend to his latest property development.
Not a hotel this time. Warwick wasnt interested in buying another Sydney hotel, despite his earlier acquisition now making a nice profit after hed put in a gym and a lounge bar, as shed suggested. This time hed chosen a night club up at the Cross, a rather run-down, seedy establishment that had definitely seen better days. But Warwick had seen potential in its position and was currently making the place over into the kind of high-class club that would attract the rich and famous with its luxurious ambience, wonderful food and top entertainment. Hed consulted Amber quite a lot about the refurbishing, complimenting her often over her various suggestions. In truth, she was as excited by the project as he was and often accompanied him to the site.
Not this past week, however. He hadnt offered to take her and she hadnt asked. Even if hed asked her today, she probably would have said no. Shed had other plans.
Amber had known it would take many hours to prepare for the evening ahead. Shed gone to the hairdresser first, after which shed bought herself a new dress, something extra pretty and feminine. Then shed had to shop for food, set the table, prepare the bedroom, and, finally, herself.
Oh, yes, Amber thought ruefully as her eyes cleared to rake over her reflection. Shed spent hours on herself, making sure that she looked exactly as Warwick liked her to look.
On the surface, her appearance hadnt changed much since the first day theyd met. Her hairstyle was exactly the same, though shed given in to Warwicks request to have her honey colour lightened to a cool, creamy blonde. And it did look classier somehow. Her eyebrows were more finely plucked these days, and the makeup she now wore was extremely expensive, not from the supermarket ranges that she used to buy. Although she couldnt see all that much difference, despite the time it took to apply everything. Maybe the lipsticks stayed on a little longer and the mascara was definitely waterproof.
Her figure was still basically the same, longer workouts in the gym ensuring that all the restaurant food shed devoured over the past ten months hadnt settled on her thighs or her stomach. Slightly taller than average, Amber had been blessed with a naturally slim body, yet enough curves to attract male attention.
Of course, her wardrobe had changed dramatically, Warwick insisting that she allow him to dress her the way a woman of her exquisite beauty should be dressed. He always called her a woman, never a girl. Shed been powerless to resist his complimentsas shed been powerless to resist himand now had a walk-in robe full of designer clothes; something for every possible occasion.
Nothing too sexy, though. Warwick said that true sexiness was what was hidden, not what was displayed.
A shiver trickled down Ambers spine when she thought about what was hidden under the softly feminine Orsini original she was wearing.
The long-awaited sound of her cell phone ringing had her throwing her hairbrush down and racing back out into the living room, where she thought shed left it. But the sound wasnt coming from there. Had she left the handset out on the balcony? She didnt think she had.
And then she remembered.
The kitchen!
Amber prayed for it to keep on ringing as she bolted for the kitchen, wishing that the rooms in this place werent quite so big.
At last she snatched the phone up into her hands, sweeping it up to her ear and saying, Thank heavens you didnt hang up, rather breathlessly at the same time.
Er its Mum, Amber. Not who you thought it was.
Amber suppressed a groan of dismay. Thank goodness she had a call waiting facility or shed go stark raving bonkers, having to talk to her mother when Warwick might be trying to contact her.
Hi, Mum, she said much more calmly than she was feeling. Whats up?
Her mother rarely rang her these days, their relationship having become strained since the day shed announced that shed quit her job, broken off with Cory and moved in with her billionaire boss.
Amber could well understand why her family didnt approve of her actions and shed finally given up trying to justify what shed done. Because there was no justification. She couldnt even use love as an excuse. Thered been no love back then, just lust. Though she preferred to think of it as passionthe kind of passion that was as powerful as it was impossible to describe, especially to your mother.
It had been quite a few months before Amber realised shed actually fallen in love with Warwick. Up till then shed been so blinded by her desire for the man that shed been unaware of the deepening of her emotional attachment. The illumination of her true feelings had happened with all the suddenness and force of a bolt of lightning. Theyd been staying at a resort in far North Queensland one weekend late last summer, when Warwick had decided to go bungee-jumping. Shed refused to participate herself but had gone along to watch, knowing it was better on her nerves to accompany Warwick on his thrill-seeking activities rather than stay behind and worry. Something had gone wrong with the length of the rope and his head had almost hit the rocks below. Amber had been absolutely horrified, both by his near miss and the realisation of her love.
Up till then, shed convinced herselfperhaps as a form of self-protectionthat she wouldnt be heartbroken when her time with Warwick was up. After all, broken hearts were for people who truly loved each other. Shed told herself repeatedly that going back to the real world would be difficult, but she would survive.
Suddenly, with Warwicks near-death experience, Amber saw what her life would be like without him. The wool was violently pulled from her eyes and she saw with painful clarity that shed been fooling herself, big time.
She did love him. Not just truly, but madly and very very deeply.
But she certainly didnt say as much to Warwick, whod made it clear right from the start that love was no more on his agenda than marriage and children. Quietly, however, like any typical female, Amber had begun to harbour the hope that she might be the exception to that rule as well; that one day hed discover that hed fallen madly in love with her too and wanted to keep her for ever. But that hope was rapidly fading.
Something strange has happened regarding Kates will, her mother announced, cutting into her thoughts.
Oh? What? She left everything to Dad, didnt she?
Who else? Aunt Kate had been a spinster and Ambers fathers only sibling.
She did in her old will. But it seemed she made a new will, witnessed by those two friends of hers. Max and Tara Richmond. You know who I mean, dont you?
Yes, of course. Amber had first met the Richmonds on Christmas day two years ago, when Christmas dinner had been held at Aunt Kates place.
Max Richmond was the owner of the Royale chain of international hotels, including the Regency Royale in Sydney, but had semi-retired to the Central Coast after his marriage. He and his wife were good friends of her Aunt Kate. They were a very glamorous-looking couple, with two amazingly well-behaved children: a darling little boy named Stevie and a very pretty blonde baby named Jasmine, who just sat in her stroller and smiled at everyone.
Amber recalled thinking on more than one occasion that they seemed the perfect family.
You may or may not have noticed, her mother said, but the Richmonds werent at Kates funeral last week.
No, I didnt notice. Shed been too upset to notice anything much.
They were overseas at the time of Kates death and didnt learn about it till they returned home yesterday. Anyway, to cut a long story short, they immediately got in touch with us to let us know that they were in possession of a new will, made just after Easter this year. In it, Kate has left her superannuation policy to your father, but her home and all its contents go to you.
What? But thats not right. I dont deserve it!
Whether you deserve it or not is not the point, her mother said archly. Kates bed and breakfast is now legally yours.
Amber blinked with shock. Her aunts B & B was situated a stones throw from Wamberal Beach, a much-sought-after location during the warmer months of the year. Any seaside town within a couple of hours drive from Sydney was never lacking for guests, especially during the school holidays. Aunt Kate had made a good living for herself over the years, though shed wound the business down a lot lately, because of her age. She didnt even have a website, relying on past customers and word of mouth for guests, plus the sign that stood at the entrance to her driveway. Even if it wasnt a going concern as a B & B any more, the house would still be worth close to a million dollars.
How does Dad feel about this? Amber asked worriedly. Is he upset?
He was at first. Not because he wanted the place himself. As you know, weve done very well with our fencing business over the last few years and were not wanting for money. But we both thought Tom and Tim should have been included in Kates will. Yet when your father spoke to them, they said they didnt mind at all. They actually seemed very pleased for you. They pointed out that they werent close to Kate the way you were. They didnt visit her or love her the way you did. Of course, both my boys have very good jobs, her mother said proudly. They dont need a helping hand. Unlike you.
What do you mean by that? Amber snapped, hurt by the pride that her mother always voiced in Tom and Tim. Doreen Roberts was one of those women who doted on her sons and largely ignored her only daughter. Ambers father was just the same. It was no wonder her sole ambition in life had been to leave home and make a family of her own, one where the love was shared around equally.
Were all worried about you, Amber, living with that heartless man. Kate was especially worried. I have a suspicion she knew she didnt have long to live, and changed her will in your favour to throw you a lifeline, so to speak. At least youll have a home and a job when that mans finished with you. Which, if he runs true to form, will be any day now.
You dont know that, Amber threw at her mother before she could think better of it.
Thats where youre wrong, dear. I know quite a lot about Warwick Kincaid and none of its very complimentary. He might be successful in his business dealings, but his personal life is another matter. Its a case of like father, like son.
Meaning?
His father was a notorious womaniser who hung himself after losing millions at a casino, according to the inquest.
Amber was truly shocked. Warwick had told her that his father had died unexpectedly at fifty-one, but shed just assumed it was from a heart attack or a stroke. Hed said nothing about suicide.
His wife divorced him soon after their only child was born, her mother rattled on, the price of her freedom being that she had to give up custody of her son. At the time, James Kincaid was one of the richest bankers in England with lots of power and influence. Its all there to read on the Internet if you ever want to look it up.
I dont have to, Mum. I know all about Warwicks family background. Which was an exaggeration of the highest order. Warwick was a man who lived in the here and now. He rarely talked about his past life. Neither did he ask her about hers. Hed told her a few brief details just before Christmas last year when shed enquired about his family. She did know about the divorce and that his motherfrom whom Warwick remained estrangedwas an actress of sorts. She knew his mother had never remarried, so he didnt have any half-brothers or -sisters. She knew nothing of his fathers womanising, or his suicide.
Then you must know that your boyfriends a womaniser as well, her mother swept on waspishly. With a mistress left behind in every country hes lived in. Its a different country each year: France, Spain, Italy, Turkey, Egypt, India, China, Vietnam And now Australia. Next year hell probably hop over to New Zealand, then on to the Americas. Hes an adventurer, Amber. And a gambler, just like his father. Maybe not at cards or roulette, but with his life. He does dangerous things.
Yes, I do know that, Mum, Amber said ruefully. Bungee-jumping and heli-skiing werent her lovers only thrill-seeking activities. Warwick liked to drive fast cars and boats. He liked everything that smacked of speed and risk. Please, can we stop this conversation right now? Youre not telling me anything I dont already know. Okay, so she hadnt known the detailed itinerary of his past love life, but shed been warned about his womanising reputation right from the start, both by Jill and Warwick himself.
And still, you stay with him, her mother said with incredulity in her voice.
I love him, Mum.
It was the first time Amber had said the words out loud to anyone other than herself.
I very much doubt it, her mother snapped. Youre just infatuated with his looks and his lifestyle.
Youre wrong, Mum. I do love him, Amber insisted hotly. And I wont leave him. Not unless he asks me to.
Her mother sighed. Theres nothing more to be said on that subject, then. So what are you going to do about Kates place? You cant just leave it empty indefinitely. Youll have to do something with it.
Could I rent it out, do you think? I mean as a holiday house? She didnt want to sell it. Not straight away.
I suppose so. But youll have to find yourself a reliable agent. And soon. Your father went up there last weekend and mowed the lawns and watered the garden but you cant expect him to keep on doing that. The place is your responsibility now.
Ambers heart jumped when she heard the familiar sound of the front door being opened. Warwick was home at last. Thank heavens! She was beginning to worry that he might have had an accident.
Mum, Im sorry, but I have to go now. Ill come over tomorrow and pick up the keys. Will you be home?
Yes. But only till twelve. I have a hairdressing appointment at twelve-thirty.
Ill be there before then. Bye.
Amber tossed the phone back down on the granite counter-top and hurried out of the kitchen, her heart thudding behind her ribs in a maddening mixture of excitement and annoyance.
Just the sight of him tipped her emotions more towards excitement. Warwick was still the most handsome man shed ever seen, with a strongly masculine face, a well-shaped head, sexy blue eyes, and an even sexier mouth. Combine that with a body to die for and an English accent that could cut glass and you had a man whod give James Bond a run for his money. In fact, he would make an excellent James Bond in Ambers opinion, his suave man-about-town fa?ade hiding a ruthless inner core. He wasnt totally heartless, as her mother had said. But he was extremely formidable.
It took courage to confront Warwick with anything, even his tardiness. Normally, Amber forgave his tendency to be late for things.
But not this time.
Where on earth have you been? she demanded to know. You knew I was cooking a special dinner for us tonight. Why didnt you call me? I left enough messages on that damned phone of yours!
CHAPTER TWO
WARWICK closed the front door behind him, slipping the security chain into place before turning his attention back to his understandably upset girlfriend.
How exquisitely beautiful she looked in that glorious pink dress! Beautiful and desirable. Not that it was a sexy garment, by any means. There was no provocative dcolletage on display. The neckline was modestly scooped, and the simple flowing style skimmed rather than clung to her curves, the handkerchief hemline reaching down past her knees.
But never before had a girl turned Warwick on the way Amber couldso damned effortlessly. She didnt have to flirt, or do any of the boldly seductive things his previous women had done. She only had to be in the same room and his hormones jumped to attention.
Suddenly, Warwick wasnt sure if he could continue with the plan hed started putting into action recently, the one where he showed himself to be the ruthless man he actually was. Much easier to give up on that ideahowever perversely noble it wasapologise profusely for being late and do what his body was urging him to do: ravish her all night long.
The temptation was powerful. But soas Warwick kept discovering to his surprisewas his conscience. For some time now it had troubled him deeply. Thanks to that wretched aunt of Ambers.
Of course, he himself had known right from the start that it had been wrong to take a girl like Amber to his bed. Shed been too young, too sweet and too sensitive.
But he just hadnt been able to resist her. The chemistry between them had been electric, right from the first moment theyd set eyes on each other.
Just one night, hed told himself at the time. To see how it would feel to make love to someone wholesome. Someone who blushed when you looked deep into her eyes; someone whose attraction for him shocked her enough to make her resign.
Well, hed found out what it was like and, come the next morning, he hadnt been able to let her go.
But now the time had come for him to do so.
Time to be cruel to be kind.
Please dont start sounding like a wife, Amber, he said coldly as he strode into the room, loosening his tie and undoing the top button of his shirt as he headed for the built-in bar in the corner. I texted you that Id be late, he threw at her after selecting a glass and reaching for the whisky decanter. For pitys sake, woman, dont nag.
I I dont think its nagging to demand politeness, she returned in a small, almost crushed voice.
He should not have glanced up at her, not then. Not when her soft blue eyes looked so wounded.
Hell on earth, he couldnt do this. Not tonight. That would be just too cruel.
Youre right, he said more gently. Sorry, sweetheart. Im a bit wound up. Had to sort out a few problems with one of the building contractors. Thats who I was with all this time, he lied. Hed actually been sitting in a bar in town all by himself, nursing a whisky for two long hours till he was rudely late. What say I go shower and change into something more comfortable whilst you rustle up dinner? he suggested. Its not spoiled, is it?
No. Immediately, her dulled eyes glowed with happiness, sending a dagger of guilt plunging into his own wretchedly dark heart.
Oh, Warwick, Warwick, he thought almost despairingly. How are you going to get yourself out of this mess? The girl loves you. Cant you see that?
Yes, of course I can see it, came a frustrated voice from within.
It wasnt the first time this realisation had jumped into Warwicks head. That day hed gone bunjee-jumping, for instance, when the damned rope had gone awry and he hadnt been killed. More was the pity. Ambers feelings had been written all over her face. Shed been trembling with shock and relief when he was brought back up, unharmed.
Unfortunately, being loved the way Amber loved himwith such sweet sinceritywas as powerful as the most addictive drug. Giving up the way she made him feel was going to take a massive act of will, one that Warwick didnt think he was capable of this evening. Knowing she wanted him to make love to her after dinner was weakening his resolve to end their relationship.
Maybe it was time to tell her the truth about himself, to force Amber to face the fact that there was no future with him.
Could he do that? Should he?
Unfortunately, revealing his genetic flaw and all its appalling inevitabilities might not bring about the desired result. If Warwick had learned one thing about Ambers character during the last ten months, it was that she was as compassionate as she was passionate. She would become visibly upset whenever she saw those ads about poor starving children, and could only be soothed when he promised to make regular donations to whatever charity was canvassing for help. Stories about neglected animals inevitably brought similar distress, as did reports on the news about more bombs killing innocent women and children in war-torn countries. Warwick had taken to putting a box of tissues at the ready by the sofa to mop up her tears.
Finding out what awaited her lover in the future might send her running, not in the other direction, but right into his arms.
It was a risk Warwick decided he could not take. He would have to find some other way to end their relationship.
Is that your glass of wine over there? He nodded towards the nearly full glass that was sitting on the side table next to the box of tissues.
Oh, yes, it is. I was having a drink earlier when I was waiting for you to come home.
Another stab of guilt. Still, he was here now.
Bet I can guess what it is, he said. A Sauvignon Blanc from the Marlborough region.
She smiled as she walked over to pick up the glass. You know me too well.
Yes, he thought as he dropped a few cubes of ice in his glass then slurped in some whisky. I do. And you deserve better than me. You deserve a man wholl marry you, give you children and grow old with you.
I cant do any of those things.
Warwick scowled as he lifted the glass to his lips, irritated suddenly by his maudlin thoughts. What good did they do? Hed always been a realist, and the reality of his life was that he couldnt offer Amber any more than hed originally offered her.
But damn it all, surely the time shed spent living with him hadnt been totally wasted. Shed travelled a lot and learned a lot. Shed socialised with some of the worlds most successful people, been dressed by the worlds most fashionable designers, stayed in the worlds most luxurious resorts.
Some women would kill for what Amber had experienced during these past ten months.
Unfortunately, Amber wasnt one of those women. Warwick knew she didnt give a fig about any of those things. All she wanted was his love and his ring on her finger.
Not that shed told him so. Not once.
Her aunt Kate had told him, last Easter at a family barbecue at her home that Amber had dragged him along to.
What an old tartar shed been. But shed obviously loved her niece and wanted to see her happy.
You do realise, Kate had snapped at him when Amber had left them to go to the bathroom, that Amber was practically engaged when she met you. To a perfectly nice boy who would have given her the only things shes wanted since she was knee high to a grasshopper: a loving husband and a family of her own. Two things youll never give her, Warwick Kincaid.
The old dragon probably could have said a lot more but didnt get the opportunity.
Shame on you, shed hissed under her breath as Amber had walked back towards them.
That had been three months ago. Warwick hadnt told Amber what her aunt had said. Hadnt asked her about the man shed been on the verge of marrying. He certainly hadnt embraced the undeniable shame the womans forceful words had momentarily evoked. Instead, hed gone on wallowing in Ambers warmth and passion, telling himself that he hadnt forced her to choose him over that other fellow. Hed never forced her to do a single thing. She had free will, didnt she? She wanted to be with him.
But gradually, the shame had resurfaced. So had his conscience, something that hed kept buried for a long time. In hindsight, his plan to stop acting like a besotted bridegroom and start showing his true colours had not been well thought out. He hadnt anticipated the hurt that his abrupt change in behaviour would bring her. Hadnt anticipated his own level of self-disgust.
Far better that the break be clean and swift.
When the time came, that was.
Her walking over and bending forward to pick up her glass of wine showed him that that time definitely wasnt tonight, his flesh stirring as he imagined how she would look doing that without that dress on.
Dinner wont be ready for at least fifteen minutes, she said as she straightened. I havent cooked the rice yet.
What are we having?
Beef stroganoff. Her free hand lifted to push her long hair back from where it had fallen over one of her shoulders. I wanted something plain for a change.
Warwicks flesh stiffened as he noted the telling outline of erect nipples under the pink silk. She was as frustrated as he was, by the look of things. Understandable considering thered been no sex this past week, the longest time hed abstained from touching her since their first night together. It had been damned difficult. But at the time hed been on a mission to make her hate him; to make her give him the flick, instead of the other way around.
Now that that idea had been tossed out of the window, Warwick had no weapons against the desires that were, at this very moment, taking dark possession of him. Various erotic scenarios filled his mind, none of which involved waiting till after dinner to satisfy his already clamouring flesh. His hunger had nothing to do with food. It was primal and sexual and urgent.
Ive changed my mind, he said abruptly.
About what?
About eating.
She looked confused. You dont want any dinner?
Not yet.
Then what do you want?
I want you to take your dress off.
Ambers eyes flung wide. What?
Warwick appreciated that hed never ordered her to take her clothes off for him. Not even in the bedroom. Why now? he wondered, even as he banished any qualms and surrendered to the temptation to exercise his sexual power over her.
You heard me, he said in a voice that was as hard as his erection.
But but people might see me, she stammered. From out on the water.
Not up close, he countered. Come now, Amber, youve nothing to be shy about. You have a glorious body. Do you need a little help, is that it?
CHAPTER THREE
AMBER just stared at him.
What I need, she suddenly felt like screaming, is a little respect.
But no words came from her mouthher rapidly drying mouth.
She stood there, rooted to the spot, as he started walking towards her, bringing his drink with him, lifting it to his lips and sipping it slowly. Their eyes met over the rim of the glass, his shocking her with their coldness. Or was that desire glittering in their ice-blue depths?
She couldnt be sure. Hed run hot and cold ever since hed come home, leaving her hopelessly bewildered.
Amber told herself to move. To do something, say something.
Anything!
But her tongue was as useless as her legs.
She remained frozen as he moved around behind her, a soft gasp breaking from her lips when he pushed aside her long curtain of hair, draping it over her left shoulder before bending his mouth to her exposed right ear.
But it wasnt his lips that made her shiver. It was the fear of what she was about to allow and enjoy.
Dont, she heard herself whisper just as his tongue tip dipped into the shell of her ear.
Dont what? he whispered a few seconds later.
Dont do this to me
But you want me to, he murmured, and nibbled at her ear lobe. This is what tonight was all about. Not food.
No, she choked out. Not entirely.
His laugh was low and sexy. Yes. Entirely.
She stiffened when he ran the zipper down past her waist, a shudder following when he stroked the cold glass he was holding down her spine.
You want this as much as I do, he said thickly as he pushed the sides of her dress off her shoulders.
It pooled around her feet in a silky pink puddle, leaving her wearing nothing but her pink high heels.
This wasnt the first time shed left off her underwear. But it was the first time shed felt ashamed of having done so.
Im exactly what Aunt Kate said I am, Amber accepted despairingly as she stood there, naked, before her wealthy lovers gaze. Not a proper girlfriend or a much loved partner, but a mistress, a kept woman. Kept for nothing but her masters sexual pleasure.
Her stomach contracted when he moved around to look at her from the front, her feelings of shame at war with those other wickedly powerful emotions he could so easily evoke. Not just desire but needthe need to be caressed, and kissed, and filled.
She closed her eyes, blotting out the way his glittering blue eyes were gobbling her up. Perversely, her not being able to see him only increased her awareness of her own appalling excitement. Every muscle in her body tensed up, waiting for his touch. Yearning for it. Dying for it.
His breath on the nape of her neck told her that hed moved behind her again. He must have put his drink down too, both his hands free to slide up and down her arms, which immediately broke into goose bumps.
Do you have any idea what you do to me? he murmured as he pressed himself against her naked back, his mouth hovering just above her right ear.
No, came her shaky reply. She only knew what he did to her, and what hed done. Reduced to this this pitiful state where shame and pride were no match for the pleasure of his lovemaking.
Though this wasnt lovemaking tonight. This was just sexraw, unadulterated sex.
If I were a prince in the Middle Ages, he whispered as he took her hands and lifted them high above her head, I would keep you just like this locked in a dungeon with nothing to do but wait for me to come to you.
She shuddered at the image hed created.
Why it excited her so much she could not fathom. She should have been repulsed. Instead, she was shaking with excitement.
Would you like that? he demanded to know, his breathing growing heavier as he pressed himself even harder against her bare buttocks.
Yes, she choked out.
His naked groan betrayed a level of need possibly even greater than her own.
What on earth am I going to do with you? he growled.
Amber moaned, having reached that point where pride and shame had become totally irrelevant. She needed Warwick inside her, right then and there, regardless of the fact that she was standing in the middle of a well-lit, glass-walled living room, less than a hundred metres away from where boats full of tourists were enjoying evening dinner cruises on Sydney Harbour.
Please, she heard herself practically beg as she moved her legs wantonly apart.
Warwick heard the wild desperation in her voice, felt the uncontrollable excitement that had taken possession of her. He should have felt triumphant. Clever old Warwick, knowing exactly what buttons to press and words to say to seduce her into a state of total surrender.
Why, then, did he suddenly feel bitterly ashamed of himself?
The answer was obvious.
Because she loves you, you bastard. Shes not some cheap whore who doesnt care what you do to her.
But even as he told himself all this Warwick was unzipping his trousers. His conscience kept screaming at him not to, but Amber wasnt the only one whod reached the point of no return.
He groaned as he slid into her, wallowing in the feel of her flesh enclosing his like a tightening fist. She made some sound, a moan perhaps, though not of pain, but of pleasure. It was impossible to stop now. With his right hand splayed firmly over her stomach, and his left cupping her right breast, he began to move his hips.
Not so fast, Warwick, he warned himself as his body immediately surged towards a decidedly premature release. His hips, however, refused to obey him. They jerked back and forth with an urgency that would not be denied, his outspread fingers pressing upwards on her belly, lifting her buttocks up higher against his abdomen, the angle affording him a deeper penetration.
Warwick grimaced as he felt the hot blood rushing along his veins. He was going to come! Hell on earth, he hadnt come this fast in decades!
Ambers suddenly shattering apart in his arms was a huge relief to his pride, allowing him to abandon what little control he had left.
He cried out, holding her tight against him as he ejaculated with the ferocity of an erupting volcano.
She shuddered with him, the contractions of her orgasm more intense, he thought, than ever before. The fantasy hed painted about keeping her imprisoned in a dungeon had really turned her on. So much so that shed forgotten who might be watching what they were up to.
You should do this more often, Warwick. Play erotic games with her.
Up till now hed hardly touched the sides of what hed learned over many years of hedonistic behaviour. There was so much more he could show her, and do with her.
The only question was should he?
As much as Warwick was tempted by the thought of becoming Ambers tutor in the erotic arts, he knew that the more imaginative and adventurous practiceswhilst wildly excitingcarried a degree of danger; the danger of corruption.
The last thing he wanted to do was corrupt Amber. Pleasure her yes. Satisfy her yes. Corrupt her? No.
He would not destroy her basic innocence, he decided as he gently withdrew, then scooped her up into his arms. Such innocence was too precious. She was too precious.
He was going to miss her terribly, he thought as he carried her into the bedroom. But not tonight. For now she was still his.
He wouldnt think about the future. Tonight was for nothing but pleasure.
Hers.
His.
But mostly hers.
CHAPTER FOUR
WHEN Amber woke the next morning, all her fears that her relationship with Warwick was coming to an end in the near future had been firmly pushed aside. She smiled as she glanced over at his naked body spreadeagled across the satin sheets, his arms and legs flung wide, his chest rising and falling in the slow, deep rhythm of the truly spent.
Amber could well understand his exhaustion. Hed been insatiable with her last night, showing her with his tireless lovemaking that he was in no way bored with her. It still amazed Amber how well he knew a womans body and how to uncover a womans secret desires. Thered been a timepre Warwickwhen she hadnt been that fussed about sex. But, from the first night shed spent with Warwick, shed become a virtual slave to the cravings he evoked and satisfied, oh, so well. Amber could not imagine living without the pleasure of his lovemaking could not imagine living without him!
But you might have to one day, whispered the voice of reason as she slipped out of the rumpled bed and headed for the bathroom.
It was a disturbing thought. What would she do when and if that happened?
Amber grimaced, clinging to the hope that maybe it wouldnt. Maybe her dream of Warwick falling in love with her and asking her to marry him was still a possibility. There were times, like last night, when she was confident that he had. There was love in his lovemaking: a tenderness and consideration that didnt equate with the cold-blooded womaniser that her mother had more or less described him as last night.
Oh, my goodness! Amber exclaimed, bolting back to the bedroom and checking the time on the digital bedside clock.
Twenty to eleven! she gasped aloud.
She immediately raced over to shake Warwick on the shoulder.
Warwick! Wake up! Wake up! I need you.
He lifted one heavy eyelid, giving her a droll if bleary look. You have to be joking, Amber, he drawled in that cultured voice of his. I would have thought youd had enough for at least twenty-four hours.
Not for that, silly! she said. I need you to drive me over to Mums place before midday, then up to Wamberal. To Aunt Kates place.
His second eyelid opened much more quickly, his sleepy expression replaced by bewilderment. Run that by me again, would you? I mean Im absolutely sure that your aunt Kate is no longer in residence. So why are we driving up to her place?
She left it to me, Amber announced rather baldly. In her will. A new one which shed made recently and which has only just come to light. Mum rang me about it last night but I forgot to tell you. No, dont start asking me endless questions right now, she raced on when he sat up abruptly with his mouth already opening. We havent the time. We have to be out of here in about fifteen minutes flat if were going to get to Carlingford before midday. I promised to pick up the keys to Aunt Kates before Mum leaves to go to the hairdressers.
Amber took it as testimony to Warwicks caring that he didnt argue, or tell her that he had more important things to do that day. He just got up and got on with what shed asked. Just after eleven they were zooming through the harbour tunnel, though Amber was still a little tense that they might not make it in time.
Ill give Mum a ring once were out of the tunnel, she said, and fished her mobile out of her handbag. Let her know my estimated time of arrival.
So tell me, Warwick asked with a brief glance her way. In your aunts new willare you the only beneficiary?
No. She left her superannuation policy to Dad. But her house and contents go to me alone.
Hmm. Ill bet your mothers somewhat peeved at you being left your aunts place, rather than her precious boys.
Ambers head swung round at this quite intuitive remark.
Did you think I didnt notice the way she favoured your brothers over you? he swept on before she could say a single word. Your father, too. I didnt have to be in their home for more than five minutes to see the lie of the land. Why do you think I couldnt wait to get you out of there on Christmas Day? Im not good at keeping my mouth shut when Im bearing witness to such an injustice, especially against someone I care about.
Amber didnt know what to say. This was the closest Warwick had ever come to saying that he loved her. She was so touched, a huge lump formed in her throat.
I I didnt realise you noticed, she mumbled at last.
I noticed all right. The only reason I didnt say something was because it was Christmas, plus I didnt want to give your parents more reason to put you down. Theyd already made it patently obvious that they didnt approve of your relationship with me. Not that they said so to my face. I would have thought more of them if they had. Your aunt Kate was a bit of dragon, but at least she loved you enough to give me a piece of her mind.
She did?
Indeed she did, he said drily.
Kate had had a reputation for speaking her mind. And a reputation for being a bit of a man hater. Though she hadnt hated all men. Shed liked Max Richmond and had always sung his praises. But then it was highly unusual, Amber supposed, for a billionaire to give up his jet-setting lifestyle to get married and raise a family away from the spotlight of wealth and fame.
What did she say? Amber asked, though she feared she already knew the answer.
Warwick shrugged his shoulders. The usual. I was a selfish you-know-what who should be hung, drawn and quartered for taking a sweet young thing like you as my mistress.
Oh, Amber choked out.
Warwicks head snapped round. Youre not crying, are you?
No, she denied, but shakily.
You are, he said with a sigh. I cant stand it when you cry.
I dont cry all that often, Amber said defensively.
You have to be kidding, sweetheart. You cry at the news, and at ads, and during all those soppy movies you like to watch. I put a box of tissues by the sofa to mop up your tears.
Theyre not real tears. Im talking about real tears. Shed only wept a few times since moving in with Warwick. Once, when her mother was highly critical of her relationship. And then, when shed heard that her aunt Kate had died. Oh, and yes, after her argument with Warwick last week.
But he hadnt been witness to that, had he? He hadnt even been in the same room.
Tears dont solve anything, you know, he growled.
Theyre not meant to solve anything, she shot back, dabbing the moisture from her eyes. They just happen.
I dont like the way women use tears to get what they want.
I dont.
No, he said, if a little reluctantly. You dont.
Lets not argue, Warwick, she said, worried that the happiness shed felt this morning was beginning to disintegrate.
Only if you promise not to cry.
She smiled over at him. See? Ive already stopped.
What about later when you get to your aunts place?
Ill do my best not to. But she rather suspected she would shed a few tears then. She hadnt been there since her aunt died, the wake having been held at a local club.
Mmm. I think I should have given you the car for the day. Let you drive yourself up to Wamberal.
But I want you with me. I need your advice on what I should do with Aunt Kates place. Besides, I dont much like driving your car.
What? You dont like driving a Ferrari? Are you insane?
I dont like speed the way you do. Promise me you wont go fast when we get on the expressway. Theres no reason to. We have all the time in the world.
Warwick almost laughed. All the time in the world was something he certainly did not have. Which meant he didnt want to spend what precious time he did have with her at Wamberal where she was sure to get weepy over her aunt all over again. Next thing he knew, shed want to keep the damned place. Maybe even go up there on weekends.
She wanted his advice? Warwick already knew what that advice would be. Put the property in the hands of a good real estate agent to sell, then come back to Sydney with him. Hed already decided he couldnt be without her just yet. Last night had shown him that. He hadnt been able to get enough of her. But maybe soon hed find the strength to end things. Until then, however, he aimed to keep things exactly as they were, with her by his side, and in his bed.
Ill wait for you in the car, he said when they finally arrived at her parents home in Carlingford just before midday. Got a few things to attend to. And he picked up his BlackBerry.
Amber didnt argue with him. Quite frankly, the last thing she wanted was him by her side when her mother answered the door. She climbed out of the car and hurried up the steep front path to the equally steep front steps. Running up them, she reached the front porch and was about to ring the bell when the door was wrenched open and her mother stood there, looking very annoyed.
Id almost given up on you coming, she said sourly.
But I rang you from the car to say Id be here.
I dont know why you had to leave it to the last minute, her mother snapped. Its not as though you work.
Amber could think of nothing to say to that. It was true, after all.
Im sorry, Mum, she heard herself apologising the way shed been doing all her life. We had a late night and we er slept in. If youll just give me the keys Ill be on my way.
Doreen sniffed her distaste as she swung away and picked up two sets of keys from the nearby hall table. Here they are, she said, and handed them over. The second set belongs to Kates car. Thats yours too, it seems.
Really? Amber could not help feeling pleased at this news. Shed only ever owned one car, a rust-bucket shed bought when shed been eighteen and had taken a second job as a waitress and needed wheels to get to and from work at night. Naturally, her parents had refused to let her use either of their vehicles. Neither had they offered to subsidise the purchase of one for her as they had with the boys.
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