Burning Secrets
Elizabeth Sinclair
Forest ranger Jesse Kingston is more comfortable with wild things than people.But his secret pain won't stop him from returning home to uncover the mystery behind his best friend's fiery death. Even if it means dealing with the woman carrying his friend's baby…. Karen Ellis has her own reason for coming to town–Jesse.Her unborn child has the right to know the truth about its father's death, and only Jesse can help her learn it. But their investigation is stoking some dangerous embers–and igniting a firestorm of desire that not even the darkest of secrets can put out.
“I’ll walk you up.”
“That’s not necessary.” Drowsiness thickened Karen’s voice, turning it husky.
Jesse faced her and covered her hand with his. “Someone tried to make sure we didn’t get off that mountain yesterday. I am not about to let you walk into a dark house by yourself. End of discussion.” He smiled. “I told you I’d do my damnedest to protect you, and that still goes.”
Warmth rushed through her body. No one had ever wanted to protect her. Just the thought turned her all soft inside. “Okay.” She slipped from the car and went up the front walk with Jesse at her side, her elbow cupped in his warm palm.
At her room inside the B and B, Karen inserted her key in the lock. The tumblers clicked, but before she opened the door, she leaned forward and kissed Jesse’s cheek lightly. “Thank you.”
He said nothing, just touched the spot she’d kissed, stared intently into her eyes and then turned on his heel to leave. After one last glance in his direction, she opened the door…and screamed.
Dear Reader,
First of all, I want to thank all my readers for the wonderful reception you gave Baptism in Fire and Touched by Fire. You truly touched my heart with all your support for my debut into romantic suspense, along with my first foray into the twisted mind of the serial arsonist.
I am very excited about the publication of the next and last book in the F.I.S.T. series, Burning Secrets, for many reasons. Mostly because it ties together Jesse Kingston’s story—the last of the Kingston family series that I began in the Harlequin American Romance line—and Karen Ellis’s story, Sam’s sister from Touched by Fire, in a grand finale. So, for all of you who asked for Jesse’s story and waited patiently, here it is. Enjoy!
I’ve found that despite being terrified of fire in real life, I really enjoy writing about it and burning things up on the printed page while helping my heroes and heroines find love, understanding and inner peace. So I can guarantee there will be more arson-related stories coming from me.
In the meantime, be happy and healthy, and may all your dreams see fruition.
Until next time…happy reading!
Blessings!
Elizabeth Sinclair
Burning Secrets
Elizabeth Sinclair
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
ELIZABETH SINCLAIR
In 1988 Elizabeth’s husband, Bob, dragged her kicking and screaming from her birthplace, the scenic Hudson Valley of upstate New York, to historic St. Augustine, FL. It took her about three seconds to stop struggling and fall deeply in love with her adopted hometown. Shortly after their move, at 3:47 p.m. on August 3, 1992, she sold her first romance novel, Jenny’s Castle.
Despite the fact that she used to spend hours in the kitchen cooking big meals, Bob, Elizabeth’s most ardent supporter, has learned to enjoy hot dogs and delivery pizza as much as he used to enjoy spaghetti sauce from scratch. Oh, and he no longer complains about all the books she spends money on. Bob and Elizabeth have three children, four lovely grandchildren, a rambunctious sheltie, Ripley, and an affectionate adopted beagle, Sammi Girl, whom they found abandoned along the roadside and took into their home.
Elizabeth is the author of several romances for the Silhouette Romantic Suspense and Harlequin American Romance lines. For more about Elizabeth, visit her Web site at www.elizabethsinclair.com.
To Nancy Quatrano, a very special, caring person.
Our “furry” girls love you lots. So do we.
Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Epilogue
Chapter 1
“I’ve been a complete ass.” Karen Ellis glanced apprehensively across the dining-room table at her older sister, Samantha Branson.
“Yes, you have.” Sam softened the accusation with a smile. “Want to tell me why?”
Sam’s birthday party guests had left hours earlier, and there was no longer any way Karen could escape the inevitable explanation that had waited years to be put into words.
Nervous about how Sam would take her admission of guilt, Karen put off explaining by repeatedly running a piece of yellow ribbon between her thumb and forefinger. As it slid between her fingers, the ribbon’s curl became tighter and tighter, until it mirrored Karen’s coiled nerves. Needing no reminder of how much the mere thought of having this conversation had made her skin crawl, Karen threw the ribbon back into the pile of torn and crumpled wrapping paper, empty gift boxes and mangled bows that littered the table.
“Well?” Sam prompted.
Karen glanced at her. Even though Sam pressed her for an answer, Karen could tell from her sister’s guarded expression that she had no more desire to open the door to their very painful past than Karen did. The uncomfortable silence of two strangers trying to find common ground enveloped them.
Sam shifted forward, determination evident in her set mouth. “What happened to us, Karen? We were close once, when we were little. When did it all fall apart?”
Karen took a fortifying breath. No matter how difficult and no matter what the consequences, the time had come to clean the slate and finally be honest with both herself and Sam.
“I guess it started when I began blaming you for Dad walking out on us and Mom living vicariously through you in her quest for fame and, in the process, forgetting she had two daughters.” Karen looked away, ashamed now of how long she’d allowed her petty, misplaced blame to stand between them. “But you were as much a victim as I was.” She shrugged. “Maybe more so. After having a long talk with Dad today at the party, I understand why he left. It couldn’t have been easy for him watching Mom steal our childhood by treating me like a stepchild and dragging you from beauty pageant to beauty pageant.” All the years of loneliness that had burned inside her seemed to melt away with each word she spoke. She pushed on.
“You were the shining star and I became the invisible child. Samantha’s hanger-on sister. Mom’s unwanted burden. Somewhere along the way I began to resent you for it. It wasn’t until years later that I realized that Mom never gave you a choice. By that time, I didn’t know how to fix things between us.” Her eyes burned with unshed tears. “Can we fix it?” She blinked the tears away and met her sister’s gaze. “Can we?”
“Isn’t that what we’re doing?” Sam smiled and squeezed Karen’s hand. “It’s in the past, sweetie. If I’ve learned anything in the last few months, it’s that we have to let the past rest and not taint today. Life is too short for should-haves. Sometimes we’re so busy worrying about what was that we miss out on what can be.”
Emotion clogging her throat, Karen could only nod. She didn’t think she deserved Sam’s forgiveness, but she was infinitely glad that she’d given it, especially now. Never had she needed her sister more.
“The Ellis sisters are reunited, so where are the smiles?” Tilting her head, Sam frowned. “Could it be that burying the hatchet isn’t the only thing that brought you here?”
“Not entirely. Truth is, I’m—” Karen swallowed hard, summoning the courage to let go of her precious secret.
Sam got up and came around the table. She drew up a chair beside Karen and put her arm around her sister’s shoulders. “You’re what?” She waited, but Karen still couldn’t find the words. “Come on. We’re sisters. Sisters share.” Sam laid her forehead against Karen’s. “Remember how we used to whisper our secrets to each other after Mom and Dad went to bed?”
Unable to force words past the clog of emotion in her throat, Karen nodded.
Her sister squeezed her hand again. “Well, I’m still willing to be your confidante.”
Karen raised her head. “You’re the best.”
Responding with a grin and a wink, Sam looked happier than Karen could remember ever seeing her. “That’s what A.J. tells me.”
The all-too-familiar ache of loneliness that had squeezed her heart for the last three months grew inside Karen. Sam was so lucky to have A.J. Her handsome detective husband doted on her, and anyone with eyes in their head could see the depth of his love for his wife.
“Sam, I’m pregnant.”
The words tumbled out before Karen could stop them, but as she said them, she felt the tension drain from her body. Until that very moment, she hadn’t realized how much it had been costing her to carry this burden alone.
Sam’s mouth fell open. Surprise and delight danced across her features. Then she hugged Karen. “That’s wonderful. When are you due? What about your husband? I didn’t even know you’d gotten married.” Her eyes filled with questions, Sam leaned closer and studied Karen for a long moment. “Why do I get the feeling that you’re not a happy mother-to-be?”
Sunshine sifted through the window and beat down on Karen’s cold, tightly clenched hands. Amazed that talking about this could still hurt so much, she reached deep down inside and summoned the words of explanation. “I’m thrilled about the baby, but…I’m not married, Sam. The baby’s father, Paul Jackson, died three months ago in a forest fire in upstate New York.” Old pain muffled the last few words. She cleared her throat of emotion. “He didn’t know about the baby. Aside from my doctor and now you, no one else knows.”
Smoothing her hand over her flat stomach, Karen couldn’t help but smile. At three and a half months, she wasn’t showing yet, which had helped her keep her secret. The weight loss she’d suffered from morning sickness and the shock of Paul’s death had kept her pregnancy concealed from everyone but her doctor. And that’s the way she’d wanted it, until now.
Paul’s child was all she had left of him, and she wanted to treasure that for a bit longer. Not having the opportunity to mourn Paul in the normal way, the process had been hard for Karen to weather, but she’d made it. But only by reminding herself of her responsibility to her child. Memories of Paul continued to haunt her. But memories weren’t the only thing on her mind.
“There’s something else.” Karen grasped Sam’s arm in a desperate grip. “I want this baby to have the family we never had. I want to find Paul’s family and tell them about the baby. Will you help me?”
Perplexed, Sam stared at Karen. “I don’t understand. Why don’t you know where his family is? Didn’t you meet them at his funeral?”
Memories bombarded Karen again. “I didn’t go to Paul’s funeral. I didn’t even know anything had happened until I called the ranger station to find out why I hadn’t heard from him. By that time, Paul had been dead for weeks. The funeral and burial had already been held.
“As for family, Paul and I never discussed his or mine.” She felt the heat of her cheeks blushing slightly. “We only had a few months together, and I guess we were too busy being in love to care about our pasts. Then again, maybe we sensed that neither of us wanted to discuss our families. All I know is that he was from the Midwest and he graduated from Cornell University’s School of Forestry, where he met Jesse Kingston, his fellow ranger and best friend. I’ve contacted the university and they gave me the same runaround as the Adirondack Mountains Preserve’s ranger station—it’s against policy to give out any personal information.”
Sam thought for a moment. “Did you do a search for Paul on the Internet?”
Karen grimaced. “Do you know how many Paul Jacksons there are in the Midwest? Millions. I don’t even know which state to focus on.”
Sam sighed. “Jeez, Karen, I want to help you, but I’m not sure how.” Deep in thought, she drummed her fingertips on the tabletop. “What about his friend, this Jesse what’s-his-name? Wouldn’t he know how to locate Paul’s family?”
“Jesse Kingston.” Karen sighed. “Another dead end. When I called to talk to him, he’d just left for home on medical leave, and the ranger station wouldn’t give me his address.”
A broad grin broke across Sam’s face. “Well, I happen to have connections within the firefighting community, and my connections have connections.” She picked up the phone, punched in a number from memory and waited. “Rachel, I need a favor. Can you find the home address for a forest ranger named Jesse Kingston? He’s based in upstate New York’s Adirondack Mountains Preserve.” Sam paused. “I’ll explain later, just find it for me as soon as you can and call me back.” She covered the receiver with her hand and turned to Karen. “Do you want her to get Paul’s info, too?”
Knowing she hadn’t told Sam everything, Karen hesitated for a moment, then shook her head. She had to speak to Jesse herself. “This is enough of an imposition. If she can just get Jesse’s address, I’m sure I can get Paul’s information from him.”
For a long moment, Sam frowned at her, but finally removed her hand from the receiver. “Okay, Rachel, I guess that’s it. Thanks. I owe you one.” She hung up. “Rachel Sutherland is my best friend and the head of F.I.S.T., the Fire Investigation Special Team. She knows people she can contact. She’s going to do some digging and get back to me.”
Relief washed through Karen. Because it was pure speculation on her part, she hadn’t told Sam her other reason for wanting to find Jesse Kingston.
Paul had been a first-class forest ranger, and she was having a hard time believing that his death was an accident. She recalled vividly how upset he’d been when he’d related how a new ranger had done something very like what they claimed Paul had done. The young ranger had nearly died for his lack of good judgment.
It didn’t make sense that Paul would walk into a wall of fire that he knew would probably kill him. If anyone could tell her why Paul had done something so completely out of character, it would be Jesse.
“The mongrel son returns,” Jesse Kingston jeered softly to himself.
He backed his battered brown SUV into one of the two open parking spots in front of the Diner, his tiny hometown of Bristol’s favorite gathering place. Turning off the engine, he glanced first at the array of pickup trucks and cars crowding the lot, then at his watch. The trip south from the mountains to Bristol should have taken only a little over an hour. If it hadn’t been for the weekend traffic, he’d have been here a long time ago.
More to the point, if his boss, Chief Ranger Hank Thompson, hadn’t ordered him home to “get his head on straight,” Jess wouldn’t be here at all. He’d be in the only place he’d ever considered to be his real home—the forest.
He could still hear Hank’s words ringing in his ears. “You’re driving everyone around here crazy with your questions about Paul’s death. I want the questions to stop, and I want you to go home and get a handle on your life.” He’d taken a deep breath, and when he spoke again his voice was less strident. “Dammit! It’s not rocket science, Jess, and there’s no big mystery. The official report was that Jackson stupidly walked into a bad situation and paid the price. We all make mistakes. For your sake and mine, let it go.”
Jess couldn’t let it go. Hank was wrong. Paul didn’t make mistakes. Jess had known him since they’d graduated from forestry school. They’d been through hell together, fighting forest fires shoulder to shoulder. Paul was the best. He’d risen up the ranks fast and eventually became Jess’s superior officer. But they’d remained friends. Paul had never pulled rank on Jess until that day three months ago when he’d ordered Jess to stay behind while he’d walked into the trees and never came out.
Jesse hadn’t told Hank, but just because he was back in Bristol didn’t mean he’d stop trying to find out what actually happened to Paul. Before Jess could find any inner peace, he had to know if it was his fault—if he’d followed Paul, would it have made a difference and would Paul be alive today?
Familiar guilt flooded through him. Jess rubbed his hand over his tired, burning eyes and wished for the thousandth time that he hadn’t obeyed Paul’s orders. If he’d just followed him anyway, if he’d—
He cut off the painful musings and let his gaze wander, taking in the lazy street activity. The town hadn’t changed much. Elma Davidson hobbled toward the library with the latest bestseller tucked under her arm, a cane supporting her arthritic body. Marv Adams still had the For Sale sign in the Gazette window, right where it had been for twenty years. The Garden Club had planted a colorful array of summer flowers around the flagpole in the center of the small, grassy town square.
How deceptive it all was. Beneath its lazy, welcoming exterior, Jess could almost hear the hum of gossip that would begin when the townspeople found out Frank Kingston’s son was back. The same gossip mill had worked overtime when Jess’s mother had left his father and then again when Jess had come back here at the age of nine.
Jesse sighed. Despite the familiar sights and the fact that he’d grown up here, he still felt like a stranger. Would there ever come a time when he thought of this place as home?
He started to open the car door, but hesitated. Did he really want to stay? He could just back the car out and no one would know he’d even been there.
You’ve been running away from things all your life. Isn’t it about time you stopped?
Unsure if he was ready to face his childhood demons, Jess conceded that running hadn’t helped before and probably wouldn’t help now. He was here, and he might as well stay. Stuffing his apprehension in his back pocket, Jesse climbed from the car, closed the door and then went into the diner.
Karen’s stomach growled. She hadn’t eaten since the Danish and coffee she’d grabbed at a thruway rest stop hours ago. She leaned into the car, retrieved her purse, closed and locked the door, then headed for the diner, appropriately named the Diner. From all the travels with her mother over the years, she’d learned that the hub of any information in a small town was one of two places—the local garage or the local eatery.
Thanks to Sam’s friend Rachel’s connections, Karen knew that Jesse Kingston had just been sent home on leave to Bristol, New York. With any luck, stopping at the diner would allow her to fill her stomach and learn something about the man she wanted to meet.
Inside, Karen paused and did a double take. From its pink-and-black vinyl booths to the chrome bands around the counter stools and the rainbow-colored jukebox tucked in the back corner, the Diner looked like it had fallen straight out of an episode of Happy Days. The hum of the customers’ voices nearly drowned out the strains of a plaintive country song drifting out from the jukebox. The air hung heavy with the odor of grease, cooking meat and bodies.
A sign beside the cash register read Seat Yourself. Since there were quite a few patrons, Karen didn’t have much of a choice. The booths were taken by several couples, four men loudly discussing the latest baseball scores and one man sitting alone with his back to her, his attention buried in a newspaper.
She made her way down the narrow aisle between the booths and the counter seats and chose one of the only available stools.
A tall, thirtyish man emerging through a door to her left drew her attention from the small, cardboard menu card she’d pulled from between a napkin holder and a bottle of ketchup. Over his shoulder she could see a door with the word Roosters and a picture of a rooster in overalls chewing on a piece of straw painted on it.
The man walked down the aisle with the assurance of someone totally at home. As he moved toward her, he spoke to several people at the counter and paused to add his opinion of the Yankees’ last game to those already expressed loud and clear by the group in the booth. Moments later, obviously seeing that he was not going to change anyone’s assessment that the Yankees would take the pennant, he shook his head and moved on. He’d almost reached her when he stopped next to the booth occupied by the lone man reading the newspaper.
“Well, I’ll be damned. As I live and breathe. If it isn’t Jess Kingston in the flesh.”
Jess glanced up from the newspaper, which he hadn’t been really reading but using more as a shield against anyone engaging him in conversation. Evidently, Charlie Clay didn’t let a little thing like a newspaper stand in his way.
“Hello, Charlie.”
“When’d you get back in town?”
“Little while ago.” Hopefully, if he didn’t give the appearance of wanting to exchange pleasantries, this conversation would end quickly. Charlie’s next words told Jess he’d been successful.
“Well…nice to see you.” Charlie moved on.
As the construction worker moved on, Jess caught sight of a woman at the counter. She faced him and although he couldn’t see her eyes, which were hidden behind sunglasses, he could tell she was showing an overt interest in him. Used to his dark looks drawing attention from women, he tried to dismiss her stare. But he couldn’t seem to tear his gaze from her.
Jess didn’t recognize her. If this woman had lived in Bristol, he would definitely remember. With that kind of breathtaking beauty, how could he not? Feeling more interest in a woman than he had in some time, Jess made no effort to hide his blatant appraisal of her.
A cascade of ash-blond curls fell around her shoulders, which were exposed by her snug green halter top. Low-slung jeans molded her curvy hips, thighs and endless legs. She removed her sunglasses and brilliant green, questioning eyes gazed back at him.
To his surprise, he felt his breath catch. His chest expanded in an effort to draw in enough oxygen to sustain him. His throat went dry. Jess felt more life surging through him than he would have believed possible. Still, two questions hammered at his mind.
Who is this gorgeous woman, and why is she staring at me?
When Karen had heard the man’s name, her heart beat had sped up. She gasped. Unable to believe her luck, she stared across the narrow aisle at Jesse Kingston. His gaze slid over her. Rather than seeing it as an insolent gesture, she felt her body warm involuntarily, as though he’d actually made physical contact with her skin. He was probably one of the handsomest men she’d ever encountered. Windblown waves of jet-black hair framed his tanned face, and the set of his square jaw proclaimed an unbending nature.
Stop it, Karen!
But the desolate look in his dark brown eyes struck a chord inside her. A sharp ache passed through her heart. She knew that look. She’d seen it often enough on her own face while she was growing up. Loneliness. She also knew he’d never admit it, because she never would have. She’d lived inside her painful world, praying for someone to notice. But no one ever had.
Even though she empathized with his pain, there was nothing she could do for him. Nothing she wanted to do. So why did she still feel this overwhelming need to try?
Since Paul’s death, she hadn’t noticed any man, drop-dead handsome or dirt ugly, and her unsolicited reaction disturbed her. Why now? Why him?
Mentally shaking herself, she redirected her thoughts. She hadn’t come here to ogle the local male population. Jesse Kingston interested her for two reasons and two reasons only—to find out how to contact Paul’s family and to discover how much of an accident Paul’s death had really been. And there was no time like the present to start finding those answers.
She stood and walked to the booth where Jesse sat, his gaze still fastened on her. “Hello, Mr. Kingston. I’m Karen Ellis.” She extended her hand. He ignored it. Despite the obvious snub, she waited for some reaction from Jesse, but none came. “I need to talk to you about Paul Jackson,” she said before she lost her nerve.
Jesse’s face grew grim and stiff. “I have nothing to say about Paul.”
Throwing her what could only be classified as a disdainful glare, Jesse laid the paper aside, stood, then tossed a few bills on the table. He shouldered past her and walked out the door to the diner.
Chapter 2
Jesse sat in his SUV outside his youngest half sister Emily’s house, his mind focused on Karen Ellis. The woman’s beauty had stirred to life emotions that he hadn’t felt in a very long time, if ever. But he couldn’t allow his testosterone to rule his thinking.
What did she want to know about Paul and why? Had she heard about the suspicious circumstances of Paul’s death? Was she a reporter?
Though this parade of questions drummed at his mind, he knew he had other fish to fry right at the moment. He stared at the sprawling white Victorian house he’d grown up in, debating whether or not to go in. Some potent memories awaited him inside that door. Was he strong enough to come face-to-face with them? Did he even want to?
Still groping for an answer, he glanced up in time to see the front door fly open and his half sister Emily hurry onto the porch. Following her were Rose, Emily’s mother-in-law, who had been the Kingston’s housekeeper for years; Emily’s husband, Kat Madison; and their twin little girls, Cat and Casey. Kat slid his free arm around Emily and pulled her close to his side.
The family picture created the same hollow ache inside Jesse that he’d felt all his life—he was a part of the household, but not the family.
A tap on his side window drew his attention. He turned to find his other half sister, Honey Logan, staring in at him.
“Are you planning on getting out sometime soon? Em has to put the twins to bed before dawn, you know.” A wide smile softened Honey’s words.
Jesse grinned sheepishly, opened the door and stepped out. Before he knew what was happening, her welcoming arms enveloped him. Quickly, he pried himself from her embrace and took a step to the side, the small distance between them doing little to ease the discomfort he’d derived from the emotional welcome.
“How are you, Honey?” He shoved his hands in his pockets.
She stood back, then glanced over her shoulder at a man Jesse hadn’t noticed before, her husband, Matt Logan. “I’m happy, Jesse. Very happy.” Her radiant smile affirmed it. Finally, that was one part of his past he could put to rest. If only the rest would prove that easy.
Jesse shook hands with his newest brother-in-law. “Matt.”
“Jesse. Good to have you home.”
Honey reached for a young boy standing near her and pulled him to her side. “Danny, say hello to your uncle.”
The boy looked exactly like his father. Danny held out his hand to Jesse. “Hi, Uncle Jesse.”
“Hey, Danny.” Jesse shook the small hand.
“Hey, remember us?” Emily called from the porch.
“Would you let us forget?” Honey called back, displaying the usual banter that had been the signature of his half sisters’ relationship all their lives, a relationship from which Jesse had always felt excluded.
They all headed for the porch and more hellos. By the time they were ready to go inside, Jesse still hadn’t been able to shake the strange discomfort he’d gotten from their enthusiastic greetings and his inability to return them. Coming into his sisters’ lives at the age of nine, he’d never been really close to either of them.
Hesitantly, he let Rose lead him into the house. He paused for just a moment on the threshold. Emily’s mother-in-law smiled, patted his arm and urged him forward with a gentle nudge to his back.
“It’s not the same place, Jesse,” Rose told him softly, then added an understanding smile.
The house was nothing like what he remembered from the time Rose had cooked and cleaned for his father. Emily had completely redecorated it with bright colors, ruffled curtains and tons of greenery. Two identical playpens filled with toys and stuffed animals occupied the space where his father’s recliner—the chair Jesse had always referred to as “the throne”—had stood. A golden retriever lazed in a puddle of sunlight near the playpens.
One thing was missing—something that made the most distinct difference, something he’d always associated with this room—his father’s cigarette smoke. This had been the room where Jesse had come face-to-face with his father for the first time, where he’d come frequently to have punishments meted out, where he’d confronted his father over Honey’s impending, disastrous marriage to Stan, her first husband, and where he’d seen his father for the last time. More than anything else, the absence of the smoke that had labeled the room as Frank Kingston’s erased his presence from the house.
“Dawg!” one of the twin girls shouted and pointed, yanking Jesse from the past.
As if on cue, the golden retriever stood, stretched and sauntered over to Jesse, then offered her ears to be scratched. As he obliged, he glanced at his family.
They have it all.
And what did he have? The house next door, a house he hadn’t been inside since long before he’d bought it on a whim to allow Emily to have this one. A family whose love and affection made him want to run. And enough guilt sitting on his shoulders to sink a battleship. Quite a summation of a man’s life.
“Uncle Jesse?”
He roused himself and looked down at his nephew. “Yes, Danny?”
“We’re having a welcome home barbecue for you tomorrow. Mom says so.” The boy made the declaration as if Honey’s word ranked right up there with the Pope’s.
Jesse looked at Honey, who smiled from her place at Matt’s side. Jesse didn’t have the heart to tell her that a family reunion wasn’t high on his to-do list. All he wanted was some time alone to come to terms with the mystery of his best friend’s death.
He laughed uncomfortably, then sobered and cleared his throat of a surprising surge of emotion. “You guys don’t have to do that.”
Emily came forward and touched his arm. “We want to. We missed you.” Then, as if realizing she was causing him discomfort, she stepped back and lightened her tone.
Jesse felt another nudge to his side. Again, it was Danny. “Mom says maybe you can even bring a date, if you want.”
Jesse’s thoughts flew immediately to a pair of brilliant green eyes and hair the color of buttercups at twilight. In a strange way, the image surprised him by easing the tension from his coiled nerves. But it didn’t make the idea of spending an entire day as the center of his family’s attention any easier to swallow.
His expression must have telegraphed his hesitation, and Kat caught it.
“Your sisters have worked all week preparing your favorite foods, so don’t think you can hide out there in the woods.” Kat gestured toward the thick forest bordering the back lawn, where Jesse had taken refuge as a child. “Old Goldie’s got a nose like a bloodhound and can find anyone.” Kat winked at Jesse, making light of the veiled warning not to disappoint his sisters.
Jesse looked around at their smiling faces, still amazed that they’d go to these lengths for him and that they even remembered what foods he liked.
“I guess I’d better show up, then.” Trying to make light of his hesitation, he winked at Kat. “There is one condition. Emily isn’t cooking, is she?”
Emily laughed, then stepped forward and raised her small fist as if she was going to punch him in the arm. Jesse instinctively pulled away. She dropped her hand and then shoved it in her pocket. Looking nervously at her husband, she moved into the circle of his arms. He held her loosely while she glanced back at Jesse.
The expression on Emily’s face, as though she’d run into an invisible brick wall, burned into Jesse’s mind. Was that how his sisters saw him, aloof and untouchable?
The next day, as Karen drove down Bristol’s main street, she inhaled the sweet scent of the flowers blanketing the square. The hum of people hurrying down the street toward the church lent life to the morning ambience of the small town. The sheer peace of the scene seeped into her tired body.
Having overslept and missed the eight o’clock B and B deadline for breakfast, Karen had opted to eat at the Diner. While she’d been eating, she’d asked the waitress for directions to Jesse Kingston’s. The waitress had told her that she was fairly new to the area and had no idea about Jesse’s residence, but she did know where Jesse’s sister Emily lived because she’d been there to buy one of Emily’s golden retriever puppies for her daughter.
With Emily Kingston’s address and directions lying on the passenger’s seat, Karen headed toward the outskirts of town. Passing down tree-lined streets with kids scattered everywhere engaging in a variety of Sunday activities, she touched her flat stomach and allowed the contentment of the place to calm her.
Oddly enough, with the calm came thoughts of Jesse Kingston. What was that bleakness she’d seen in his eyes? Why was a good-looking man like him sitting alone in the local eatery, looking lost and sporting the hair-trigger temper of a bull in heat? And why did she care?
Judging by Jesse’s rude behavior in the diner the day before, he was not going to be terribly forthcoming with information about Paul. But what she didn’t understand was why. Why refuse to talk to her about his best friend? And it hadn’t been just the refusal. The look on his face had almost dared her to push him, but to be ready to suffer the consequences.
Well, whatever his reason, she would not leave Bristol until he answered her questions. She gently caressed her tummy. “Don’t worry, little one. We’ll find your family. I promise.”
About fifteen minutes later, she pulled up to a beautiful old Victorian house. Several cars were parked in the driveway. Too many to belong to the small family the waitress had said Emily had. Not wanting to interrupt what looked like it might be some sort of family gathering, Karen reached for the key to start the car and leave.
“Hi, can I help you?”
Karen started and for a moment could only stare at the blond woman peeking in her open car window. Then as if someone had jabbed her in the ribs, she roused herself.
“Hi. I’m Karen Ellis. I’m looking for Jesse Kingston, and I was told I could find someone here who could tell me where he lives. I need to talk to him on an urgent matter.” She glanced around at the other vehicles. “But I don’t want to interrupt your party. I can come back another time.”
The strikingly lovely woman extended her hand. “I’m Honey Logan, Jesse’s sister. He’ll be here shortly. This is a welcome home party for him. And you’re here now, so why don’t you wait?”
“Oh, I don’t—”
“Please,” Honey said, opening the car door and beckoning for Karen to get out. “No sense in making an extra trip, and if it’s urgent, you’ll be wanting to see him sooner rather than later.”
Karen could have kissed her. “If you’re sure. I don’t want to spoil your party.”
“You won’t spoil anything, and if you knew me better, you’d know I don’t say anything unless I mean it,” Honey said. “Now, let me take you around back and introduce you to the mob.”
Almost unconsciously, because it had become an extension of her arm, Karen grabbed her camera from the seat and hooked the strap over her shoulder. Since she had started working on a pictorial coffee-table book about rural America, she’d brought the camera along on her trip to Bristol, hoping she’d get some shots of the locale after she’d spoken with Jesse.
She followed Honey across the lawn to the backyard. As they rounded the corner of the house, she came face-to-face with a picture that made envy rise up to choke her. Before her was the exact scenario she’d dreamed of seeing her baby a part of one day.
Two identical little girls fought over a tire swing while a man who was obviously their father refereed. In a corner of the yard, a large golden retriever barked at another man and a young boy who were tossing a football back and forth while they watched over a grill emitting mouthwatering aromas. Not far from the grill, two women were setting a picnic table for a meal.
Karen was enthralled with the family scene and turned to thank Honey for including her. Before she could say anything, Jesse’s sister led Karen to the picnic table and within minutes had introduced her to everyone. To Karen’s astonishment, they all treated her like a member of the family and not a party crasher.
Karen adjusted her seat at the wooden picnic table and raised her camera. She looked at Emily for permission. Emily caught her glance, smiled and nodded. Focusing, Karen snapped a picture of Emily’s twin girls pouring sand into each other’s hair in the sandbox. She had just clicked the shutter when their mother discovered them and hauled them both off toward the hose on the side of the house. Once she got Emily and Kat to sign one of the release forms she had in the car, the photo would make a great cover shot for her book.
Karen had been working on the book for months and already had a sizable advance in her bank account, which would help her get through the baby’s birth and a few months after. Now, if she could just find the enthusiasm to finish it. Since Paul’s death, her instincts for survival had made her focus all her attention and energy on her baby and its well-being.
Watching this close, loving family interact made her that much more determined to find Paul’s family so her baby could have this kind of support, love and closeness, a wonderful addition to the love she knew the child would get from its grandfather and Aunt Samantha.
“Aha, we have a shutterbug among us,” Emily announced, flopping down beside Karen and eyeing the camera and its bulky zoom lens. “The expertise with which you handle that complicated-looking thing makes me think this is more than just a hobby.”
Karen laughed and laid the camera on the picnic table. “Guilty. I’m a freelance photographer.”
Before she could say more, something over Karen’s shoulder drew Emily’s attention. Jesse’s sister smiled in the direction of the field beyond the lawn’s edge and stood, their conversation forgotten. “Do my eyes deceive me, or is our brother deigning to join us?”
Everyone, including Karen, turned their attention to the man coming toward them. Jesse Kingston, his measured gait marked with obvious reluctance, slowly made his way through the field’s high grass, his head bent as if studying each step, his dark hair glistening in the sunlight.
By the time he’d reached them, Honey had come to stand next to Karen. Jesse’s older sister laid her hand on Karen’s arm and announced, “Karen Ellis, I assume you know my brother, Jesse.”
Jesse looked Karen in the eye and nodded curtly. Even though his greeting was less than cordial, Karen’s insides twisted with a strange pleasure. When his simmering, dark gaze touched her, a bottomless feeling invaded her stomach and an inexplicable warmth swept through her body. It had to be pregnancy hormones. Determined not to let him get to her on any level, personal or otherwise, she centered her gaze on his face. What she saw there didn’t surprise her. There it was again, that stark loneliness.
Jesse hid any spark of surprise at finding Karen here with his family. “Yes, Ms. Ellis and I have met.” He’d thought of every excuse not to come here and had failed to find anything that he thought his family would accept. Now, seeing this woman again—the woman who had insinuated herself into his dreams last night—he wished he’d tried harder.
Honey looked at Karen, questions evident in her expression. “But…”
“Your brother and I met at the Diner.” She dragged her amused gaze from Jesse to Honey. “But we didn’t have a chance to really talk.”
Her soft voice swept over him like a breeze off his beloved mountains. The woman hadn’t lost an ounce of appeal. And he hadn’t become less reactive to it. He rubbed his palms together to remove the light sheen of perspiration that had broken out there.
“Pleasure meeting you…again, Ms. Ellis.” He dropped his head and his gaze inadvertently landed on her breasts. His groin stirred to life. Quickly, he glanced away, then checked out the activity in the yard. “Looks like everyone’s here.”
“We’ve just been waiting for you,” Honey said, eyeing him with a look that said, We were afraid you wouldn’t show.
“Then let the festivities begin.”
Honey laughed. “I hate to point this out, little brother, but the festivities are well underway already. It’s the food that’s been waiting. Rose will be relieved that her picnic lunch hasn’t been ruined. Excuse me, Karen.” Honey hurried toward the back door of the house.
Jesse grabbed a cold beer from the galvanized tub holding the iced drinks. Ignoring Karen, he strolled to the seclusion of a large oak tree at the side of the yard and sat in the dark circle of its shade. From there, he could watch his family playing games and interacting.
But he didn’t stay centered on them for long. Instead, he found his gaze drawn to Karen. Who was she, and what did she want? Why had Honey invited a stranger to join in a family event? From the corner of his eye, he caught Karen studying him. To his displeasure, she started to walk in his direction. Evidently, the woman didn’t know the meaning of I don’t want to talk to you.
She’d only gone a few steps when she raised her camera and snapped a picture of him.
“What’s that for?” he asked, when she got close enough.
“Posterity.” She sat beside him.
Her perfume wafted to him on a light breeze that picked up a few strands of her hair and then laid them on her cheek. He itched to brush them away, test the feel of her skin, but fisted his hand around the cold beer can and asked the question that had popped into his head the moment he recognized her. “Why are you here? Certainly not to snap pictures of a family you don’t even know.”
Karen stared off into the woods beyond the lawn. By the time she spoke again, he’d all but decided she wasn’t going to answer him.
“The pictures are for a coffee-table book I’m putting together. And I’m here because Honey asked me to stay so I could speak with you.” She turned to him, her face serious, her bottom lip quivering ever so slightly. “I was Paul Jackson’s girlfriend, and I have some questions to ask you about him.”
Girlfriend?
The word exploded inside Jesse’s head like a firecracker. How could she have been Paul’s girlfriend? Paul was married.
Chapter 3
How could this woman have been Paul’s girlfriend when he was already married? But before Jesse could ask, Honey and Emily had walked across the freshly mowed backyard and sat beside him and Karen beneath the old oak’s spreading limbs.
“Rose will be bringing out the food in a few minutes,” Honey announced, then turned to Jess. “Karen needs pictures of some of the sights around town. Em and I figured you could show them to her. Maybe take her up to the ice caves.” His matchmaking sisters’ smiles reflected a small degree of self-satisfaction and the bright glow of manipulation.
They both knew that the caves were miles from civilization, infrequently visited by anyone, even tourists, and the perfect place for two people who wanted to be alone. Problem was, being alone with a woman who pulled on his emotions like an expert violinist played a Stradivarius was the last thing he wanted.
Before either Karen or Jesse could comment on his sister’s suggestion, Rose called everyone to gather around and help themselves to a platter piled high with barbecued chicken, a bowl of potato salad and a rectangular pan of baked beans. The four of them rose and slowly made their way across the yard.
For the next hour, all conversation halted as everyone dug in. Jess had missed Rose’s cooking. Shortly after the main course had disappeared and the bowls and platter stood empty, Rose went back inside the house. Smiling, she re-emerged through the screen door carrying a scrumptious looking chocolate cake. She set it carefully on the picnic table and then picked up a serving knife.
“I don’t suppose anyone wants any of this.” Rose grinned at her twin granddaughters, who whooped and scampered to her side.
“Me do,” one of the girls demanded, tugging on Rose’s apron hem.
“Me some,” the other one chimed in.
Emily groaned and levered herself from the picnic table bench beside Karen. “I couldn’t wait until they could walk and talk, but I’m beginning to think temporary insanity drove me to wish for such things.” She sighed and helped Rose cut a small piece for each of the girls. “I’m glad they’ve at least gotten teeth and aren’t eating mush anymore. Now, if we could only conquer potty training.”
Laughter rippled over the group.
Rose patted her daughter-in-law’s hand. “All in good time. All in good time.”
“Hey, Jesse, have some cake. My mother makes the best chocolate cake you have ever put in your mouth.” Kat kissed Rose’s cheek and looked down at her with a cherishing grin.
Jesse glanced at mother and son. It was hard to believe they’d only just been reunited after being separated for most of Kat’s life. It certainly didn’t resemble the reunion that had taken place in this house when, at age nine and with a newly deceased mother, Jess had come here to live and had met his father and sisters for the first time.
Jesse forced a smile. “It’s a good thing someone in your family can cook, or you’d starve to death.” He looked pointedly at Emily.
“Now, that’s not true. Rose is not the only cook in the family.” Emily paused in the task of wiping chocolate frosting from her daughter’s face, then grinned up at her handsome husband. “Kat makes a really mean lasagna.” She looked at Honey, who gave her a thumbs-up, then at her brother. “And I’d appreciate it, Jesse Kingston, if you would find a topic of conversation other than my lousy cooking.”
“But you’re so cute when you’re defending yourself,” he teased back.
Karen glanced at Jesse. Verbal banter. Safe, no emotional commitment. No physical contact allowed.
She knew how that worked. She’d often seen Paul do it. If you sidetracked people long enough with inanities, they didn’t dig for the real answers. Jesse’s silence added one more missing piece to the puzzle that made up this man. She swept her mind clear of any need to finish this particular puzzle. She had no desire to get involved in any small way with another man who was unwilling to share himself.
The family crowded around the picnic table for dessert, and Karen noted that Jess positioned himself at the very end of the bench, away from the core of activity.
When one of Emily’s girls sidled up to him, he offered her some of his cake. Her sister, not to be done out of her share of Uncle Jesse’s dessert, quickly joined them.
He leaned back and studied them. “How do you tell them apart, Em?”
Karen stepped in. “It’s easy.” She turned to Emily. “May I enlighten your brother?”
Emily nodded. “Sure. Someone needs to tell him the secret. After all, they’re his nieces and he can’t go on forever calling them ‘Hey You.’”
“Cat has a brown mole on her right wrist.” Karen watched as Jesse checked it out, then smiled when he proved her right. “Casey doesn’t have one.”
“I Cat,” the little girl announced, holding up the wrong arm for proof of her identity in an attempt to relieve any doubt as to which identical twin was which. Everyone laughed.
It suddenly struck Karen how odd it was that a stranger had learned the secret of how to tell the difference between the twins and their own uncle hadn’t. What a strange man.
Detecting a slight softening of her attitude toward Paul’s friend, Karen redirected her thoughts. Jesse Kingston might hold himself aloof from the rest of the world, but he hadn’t tangled with Karen’s determination yet. She needed information, and whether Jesse liked it or not, she would pry it out of him if it was the last thing she ever did. So far, his family had shielded him from any question she might have.
However, his family would not always be around for him to hide behind.
Jesse eased the SUV around a pothole in Emily’s driveway. He checked for oncoming traffic, then swung the car onto the main road that would take them back to Bristol. Thanks to Honey backing him into a corner, when Karen’s car had refused to start, Jesse had been delegated to drive her back to the bed-and-breakfast. Short of being rude, he could do nothing except acquiesce.
With Emily’s promise to have Kat look at the car first thing in the morning then bring it to the bed-and-breakfast still ringing in their ears, they were now sitting in the front seat of Jesse’s car like two wooden soldiers, neither of them able to find words to start a conversation.
“You didn’t have to do this, you know.” Karen’s voice filled the car’s muggy interior.
“And how would you have gotten back to town?” Jess opened the vents on the AC, adjusted the temperature, then hit the switch to turn on the fan.
“I’m sure I’d have found a way.” She paused. “Kat could have taken me.”
“Kat was putting the twins to bed.” Considering Jesse had tried his best to get out of driving her, he was surprised at feeling a little put out that she didn’t want to be here anymore than he did, and that the thought of her being, even innocently, with another man bothered him—a lot. Rather than dwell on that, he asked her something that had been on his mind. “How did you know?”
Karen turned to him, her striking beauty illuminated by the dash lights. “How did I know what?”
“About the mole. Which twin was which.”
She threw her head back and laughed. The sound washed the tension of the day from him, or maybe it was the absence of the pressure he always felt around his family. His grip on the steering wheel relaxed.
“Easy. Cat told me.”
“But—”
“She may not talk well, but she can certainly make herself understood when it comes down to who’s going to take the next turn on the swing.” Karen shifted in the seat to face him. Her bent knee brushed his thigh, sending funny little prickles zipping down his leg. “When I took them to the swing, Emily said to allow Cat to go first because they made it a rule that they had to take turns. Casey had gone first last time. When we got there, I couldn’t figure out who was who. Cat enlightened me by telling me her name and showing me the mole.”
Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Karen studying him. “I think that’s called cheating.” He cast a quick look in her direction, then returned his gaze to the safer path of the car’s headlights on the darkened road.
“If you’d made time to play with them, you’d have found out, too,” she said softly.
The statement slashed through his insides. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to get closer to his family. He just knew that when you got too close to anything, fate found a way to drive you apart again. He’d tried for years to get close to his father and in the end, the pain of not being able to had driven a wedge between them. He’d lost not only his father, but his family, as well.
Having had enough of family for one day, he shook his head. “About the sights around town…”
“Please don’t feel that you have to take me. I’ll find them on my own. I’m sure someone in town can direct me.” Karen couldn’t believe she was throwing away a golden opportunity to be alone with Jesse and finally get him to talk about Paul. She knew only that she was more aware of him now than she’d ever been of any man in her life, and she needed time to come to terms with that before jumping into an intense situation where there would be no one but them around.
“I’m glad you said that. I don’t think it would be a good move, either.”
Well, he’d jumped at that like a fish to a worm, she thought, insanely regretting she’d made it so easy for him to back out.
Having nothing to add, Karen leaned her head back against the seat. The quiet and the motion of the car lulled her into a half sleep. All that fresh air and exercise she’d had today, plus not sleeping well in a strange bed, were taking their toll.
“So, how did you like the Kingston family’s version of a backyard barbecue?”
Karen yawned, then stretched. “Well, in addition to having one of the best days I can ever remember, I got a terrific taste of rural life. For instance, I know now that I can find room for chocolate cake, even when I’m sure my stomach can’t hold another ounce of food, and that after the sun goes down the human body becomes a target for every blood-sucking insect in the world.” She absently scratched one of the insect bites on the fair skin of her inner arm.
Her profile drew his gaze. With her hair tousled by the breeze coming from the AC vent and a trace of sunburn coloring her cheeks, she took his breath away. He didn’t think anything could surpass the beauty he found in his mountains, but Karen did. And it wasn’t just surface beauty. Quickly, he averted his attention back to the road.
Despite his best efforts not to, he recalled how she’d interacted with the twins, and how he’d envied her relaxed ease with them and Danny. She’d fit in with his family like an old comfortable shoe, something he’d always longed for, but had never been able to achieve. Karen had done it in one short afternoon without even trying and had soaked every second up like a thirsty sponge. She had an ability to draw people to her like flies to honey, an inner beauty that radiated…what?
He had no idea. But whatever it was, Jesse knew that particular quality had been missing from his makeup for as long as he could remember. He just didn’t mix with people. Which was why he was better suited to the solitude of the forest. But even that had been marred now by Paul’s death
Thoughts of Paul reminded him that he had no business thinking about Karen like any other woman. She wasn’t any other woman. She’d been Paul’s girlfriend. His illicit girlfriend, he reminded himself. Had she known Paul was married? No. After having seen her genuineness today, he could not believe she would intentionally step between a man and his family.
Jesse pulled the SUV to the curb in front of the Land of Nod Bed-and-Breakfast and stopped.
“Jesse, I want to ask you something, and it may not be any of my business, but…” Karen paused and stared out the window.
“But?” He held his breath waiting for her to ask about Paul.
When she turned her face to him, shadows made it impossible for him to see her expression. “Why do you hold your family at arm’s length? I mean, they’re so warm and friendly, and you just don’t seem to even try to fit in. I never really had a family like that and…Well, I’d give just about anything to have all those loving people around me all the time.”
That was definitely not what Jess had expected. Relief took hold of him first, followed quickly by surprise, then a wave of anger at the imposition of her prying into his personal life. A product of long conditioning, his defenses rose like an invisible shield against a towering beast. “You’re right. It’s none of your business.”
She sighed and released the seat belt. Turning to him, she laid a hand on his thigh. “They want you to be part of them, part of their lives. Can’t you see that?”
Easy for her to say. His family might want him to join in now, but what about later? What about when they found out what had happened that day in the woods? How would he live with the pain of their rejection again?
He removed her hand from where it was burning into his flesh through the material of his jeans and sending strange sensations through him, tempting him to do things they’d both be sorry for come morning, forcing him to remember how very much he wanted to kiss her. “Leave it alone, Karen. It’s almost eleven o’clock. You should go inside and get some sleep.”
She pursed her lips stubbornly.
Jesse’s breath caught in his throat. What did they taste like? Were they soft, warm, moist?
“I can’t leave it alone,” she said. “I guess it’s the nurturer in me. Or maybe it’s just that I’ve always wanted what you seem to push away every chance you get. I guess I don’t understand why I see you hurting and them trying to ease that hurt, and you just won’t let them.”
His anger built, unreasonably fueling his need to kiss her. “Stay out of it,” he ground out.
She opened her mouth to speak again. He could think of only one way to silence her. The one thing that had taken over every sane thought in his head. He grabbed her, hauled her into his arms, then covered her lips with his.
At first he tried to punish her for interfering in his life, for resurrecting Paul, for making him want things he couldn’t have, but then, when her lips relaxed under his, and she showed no sign of struggle, the kiss changed. Subtly at first, then deepening by degrees. He relaxed his mouth and sent his tongue to explore the shape of her lips. Slowly, he outlined them, tasted their sweetness, learned their texture.
Then she opened her mouth to him like a baby bird waiting for sustenance. Accepting her silent invitation, his tongue snaked between her teeth. She groaned softly, and he pulled her closer, aligning her curves with the hard surface of his body.
Suddenly, she pushed him away. The handle on the driver’s door dug into his spine. Struggling to find his center of gravity, he took in large gulps of night air.
“This…is…wrong,” she said, her breathing erratic, her hair tangled invitingly around her face. She brushed it away from her eyes, then breathed deep. “We have to think about…Paul.”
Think about Paul? Hell, he’d thought of little else since the wildfire.
Before he could voice his thoughts, she’d jumped from the car, hurried up the hedge-lined walk, then disappeared into the house.
For a long time, Jesse sat there staring at the house, trying to get his emotions back in line. He couldn’t let this happen, this…whatever it was about this woman that drew him like a moth to a flame. Unlike the moth, in the end he’d wind up with more than singed wings. Karen still had strong feelings for Paul. He could hear it in her voice when she said his name. And no matter how right it had felt, kissing her could only mean trouble, and more trouble was the very last thing he needed right now.
After a few minutes had passed, he saw the light in a second-story window come on. The curtain was pulled aside and someone peered out. Quickly, the figure stepped back, then pulled the shade. That simple act made Jesse feel as if he’d just been cut out of someone else’s life.
All the way home, Jesse relived the kiss he’d shared with Karen. That common sense had prevailed pleased him. Who had taken the initiative and ended the kiss bothered the hell out of him. Hindsight was 20/20, but he should have been the one to pull back, not Karen. Far from a novice with women, he’d never experienced anything to equal that kiss before in his life, and it had shaken him right down to the soles of his feet. While he’d initiated it, she’d been as much a participant as he had—until thoughts of Paul stopped her. It annoyed him that she had even wanted to end it.
However, the effect it had and continued to have on him bothered him even more. The memory of how her mouth had felt beneath his occupied his thoughts, overriding the warning bells going off in his head and most of all making him wish for things that could never be. He kept recalling how her laughter spread warmth through him, how her smile lit up her whole face, the way her touch made his skin tingle for more, the way she fit into his family better than he ever had. Without even trying, Karen had become a part of him.
Was the woman a witch? Had she woven a spell that had them all captured in her silky web?
No more, he told himself. It couldn’t happen again. Once was an accident. Twice would be emotional suicide. Aside from her connection to Paul, getting involved with a woman from the city had to be one of the stupidest things he’d ever contemplated.
Hadn’t his father’s experience with his mother taught him anything? Sure, Karen would be happy now, when country life was all new and exciting, but what about after the shine wore off? What then? She’d be back in her little red sports car, speeding toward New York, back to the place that spelled safety and comfort for her. And where would he be? Would he turn into a bitter, resentful old man like his father? No. He refused to spend his life like Frank Kingston had—making other people pay for his disappointments and mistakes.
Despite all his arguments and common sense analogies, the fact remained that Jesse could not get Karen off his mind.
It was all a moot point anyway. He couldn’t get involved with the girlfriend of the man he’d allowed to die. But did he have to let it go that far? He was an adult, after all, not some adolescent with out-of-control hormones. All he had to do was remove the temptation.
Couldn’t he just keep her at arm’s length, control his own emotions, tell her what she wanted to know about Paul, help her get her pictures as quickly as possible, then encourage her to leave town? He realized that it was little compensation for a life, and that nothing would ever replace Paul, but how could Jesse not help her?
Still fully clothed, Karen lay across her bed. What in God’s name had she been thinking to let him kiss her? Letting him wasn’t the half of it, she corrected. How could she have responded like a twenty-dollar hooker to a man she’d just met?
Worst of all, why hadn’t she talked to him about Paul? She couldn’t have asked for a better opportunity. Yet she hadn’t taken advantage of it. When the answer—which she didn’t like at all—came, she realized it was because Jesse had pushed away all thoughts of her baby’s father.
She lay there for a long time, thinking. What was this attraction she felt for Jesse? And why was it strong enough to veer her away from her intended path? She waited, but no answers came.
Hell, she didn’t even know why she’d started the conversation about his acceptance of his family. He’d been totally right. She’d stuck her nose in where it didn’t belong. She’d get her answers about the fire and Paul’s family, then she’d be gone, and life in the sleepy little hamlet of Bristol would go on. How it went on was none of her concern.
When would she learn that there were some things that were better left alone? Like men with some big-time emotional problems, and dark cars that invited intimacy with a man she had no business even thinking about, much less kissing as if her life depended on it. Let the Kingstons exorcize their family ghosts. She had her own problems to contend with.
Resolutely, she jumped up, then went to the dresser. She extracted her nightie from the top drawer. Throwing it, her towel and a robe over her arm, she headed down the hall to the shared bathroom. Her bedside clock had read eleven o’clock. She still had time before her landlady turned off the hot water, Mildred’s way of saving on the electric bill. Putting thoughts of Jesse and their encounter aside, she concentrated on enjoying a relaxing shower and then a good night’s sleep.
Laying her nightie on the vanity and hanging her robe on the back of the door and the towel over the bar, she moved aside a shower curtain covered with all species of colorful tropical fish. She adjusted the water to the hot temperature she preferred, then stripped off her clothes and stepped under the spray.
The silky caress of the water brought to mind again the feel of Jesse’s lips on hers, the way he gently stroked her mouth, almost as if he worshipped it. Her body began to tingle anew and not from the hot water. Slowly, she ran her hands over her skin, her mind conjuring up the image of Jesse Kingston.
Taking the soap, she lathered her body, then massaged the bubbles into her sensitive skin. Slipping back beneath the spray, she leaned against the tiled side of the shower stall. Eyes closed, she luxuriated in the sensual feel of the hot water running over her, rinsing away the velvet lather like a lover’s hands easing away the sweet ache of desire. Jesse’s hands.
She knew with a certainty that making love with Jesse Kingston would be an experience that she’d never recover from. Right now, even with her skin tingling and her lips still swollen from their kiss, she wasn’t willing to take that risk.
Tiny shards of ice attacked her without warning. Her eyes flew open. She’d stood under the shower much longer than she’d intended. The water had turned to arctic runoff. Her memory played back Mildred Hopkins’s warning. The diminutive landlady had been quite firm.
I turn off the water heater at eleven-thirty. No sense letting it run all night. That’s just a waste of good money.
Gasping for breath and fighting a shower curtain that insisted on adhering itself to her slick body, Karen battled her way out of the shower. Grabbing her thick bath towel from the towel bar, she wrapped it around her frigid body, turned off the water, then leaned against the sink, gasping for air.
“Talk about your rude awakenings…. I’ll have to remember that for the next time I have a run-in with Jesse.” No. There would be no more run-ins, no more incidents of her sticking her nose in where it didn’t belong. And above all, no more kisses.
Jesse posed far too much danger to her peace of mind, and she’d do well to remember that. She had not come here to have an affair with a man who could leave scars the size of Texas on her heart, a man who carried his own scars and refused to share them with anyone. She might know way more than she should about the Kingston sisters and nothing about the brother who held himself apart, but she didn’t plan on rectifying that. The less she knew, the better. Once she’d gotten what she’d come for, she’d head back to the safety of New York City.
Grabbing her nightie and slipping it on, she headed back to her room. So much for a good night’s sleep. She deposited her dirty clothes in a pile beside the dresser, promising herself she’d pick them up in the morning. Throwing her head forward, she began towel drying her hair. The vigorous massage felt good and helped her vanquish thoughts of Jesse from her mind.
A knock at the door stopped her. She sighed. Her landlady. Couldn’t the woman tell time? The last thing she needed at midnight was a heart-to-heart. The knock came again, this time more insistent. It didn’t look like she was going to give up. Karen figured she might as well answer it.
Realizing she’d left her robe in the bathroom, she held the towel in front of her, strode to the door, then threw it open.
“Mildred, it’s—”
Mouth agape, Karen went numb. Her fingers relaxed their grip on the towel. It slithered down her body to the floor. Unable to move, she knew that nothing but a thin covering of revealing peach silk and lace hid her nakedness from the mesmerized gaze of Jesse Kingston.
Chapter 4
Jesse climbed back into his car, still reeling from his encounter with Karen.
He had no idea exactly what he’d said, just that he’d babbled about changing his mind and, if she still wanted a tour of the local sites, he’d meet her at the Diner the next morning. He wasn’t even sure she’d answered him. Beyond that, all he could remember was dashing out of the house with the tantalizing image of Karen in that skimpy nightie with her creamy skin and the dark circle in the center of each plump breast peeking through the lace.
Rubbing his eyes as if he could erase her image, he sighed and then stared sightlessly out the windshield. What the hell was wrong with him? She wasn’t the first beautiful woman he’d encountered.
Resolutely, he wiped beads of sweat from his forehead, adjusted his aroused lower body to a more comfortable position and started the car. If he didn’t get his testosterone under control, this woman would be his death—or what he really feared was she might become his life.
For a long time after Jesse hurried away Karen remained frozen in place. While she fought to regain control of her breathing, she envisioned the look on Jesse’s face, one she’d never seen on Paul’s in all the time they were together. It was more than raw sexual attraction. But she couldn’t put her finger on exactly what it was that had affected her so powerfully.
In that moment when she’d opened the door and Jesse had taken in the sight of her near-nudity, something had happened between them, something she knew in her gut would complicate what was supposed to be a simple fact-finding trip. Was it possible that it was just the normal reaction of two healthy people coming face-to-face with an embarrassing moment? Or was it something more dangerous?
Slowly, she closed the door, flipped off the lights, and then, skin still tingling from Jesse’s blatant appraisal of her body, climbed into bed, certain that this would be a very, very long night.
The next morning, the Diner was overflowing with early patrons. All of them, much to Jesse’s chagrin, were too interested in the Kingston boy and the city girl. Mostly the city girl.
“Hey, Jesse, who’s your friend?”
Jess looked up to see Fred Connors, the middle-aged owner of the local drugstore, grinning at Karen. The twinkle of intense interest lighting Fred’s gray eyes sent an irrational spike of jealousy through Jess. Fred had a perfect right to be interested in Karen. Jess had no claim on her, nor did he want one. But that rationalization didn’t cool Jess’s boiling blood.
He glanced past Fred to the counter. “I see your breakfast has been served up.” He leveled a challenging glare at Fred. “Wouldn’t want it to get cold, would you?”
Fred turned a deep shade of crimson and backed up. “Uh, no. Nothing worse than cold eggs,” he said. “No offense, Jess.” Fred hurried away.
“None taken, Fred.” Without looking at the man, Jess cut a hunk from the fried egg on the plate in front of him.
Karen frowned at him. “Was that necessary? He was just being friendly. After all, I’m a stranger in town, and he probably wondered who I am. Wouldn’t it have been more polite to simply introduce me?”
Refraining from pointing out that being friendly was most probably not what the man had in mind, Jess propped his fork on the edge of his plate, steepled his hands in front of him and looked Karen in the eyes. “When you’ve lived in a small town as long as I have, you learn that every breath you take is reported up and down Main Street with the speed of light. The less you tell them, the less they talk.”
Karen grinned. “But isn’t that just whetting their appetite for speculation?”
She was right. He knew that nothing got the gossip mill’s wheels turning faster than a mystery. If they didn’t get answers, they created their own. Still, something in him selfishly stopped him from sharing Karen with anyone yet, and most especially another man. Why, he wasn’t sure, nor was he ready to explore the reasons.
Shrugging, Jess picked up his coffee cup and took a long swallow, then set the cup back in the saucer. It had barely been replaced when the waitress appeared carrying a steaming carafe.
“Refill?”
Feeling the waitress’s inquisitive eyes boring into him and then Karen, Jess glanced at Karen’s empty plate. He’d had enough of them being the centerpiece of the town’s morning amusement. “No, thanks. We’re done.” He rose. “Let’s get out of here.” He threw some bills on the table and stood aside for Karen to precede him.
In the car, she swung sideways in the seat to face Jess. “Want to tell me what that was all about?”
“No,” he said and started the car. A moment later they were moving down Main Street. “So where to? The ice caves?”
For a long time Karen just stared at his set profile. “No,” she said with as much determination as he’d just shown. “I want to go to the woods and see where Paul died in the fire.”
Jess’s jaw tightened. He pulled the car over to the roadside. Leaving the engine idling, he turned to her. He had no idea why, but he was suddenly overwhelmed by a need to protect her. “Why would you want to go there?”
Karen clasped her hands tightly in her lap and stared at them. “I don’t know. I never had a chance to pay my last respects. Maybe I just need a place to grieve.” She raised her gaze to Jess’s. “Maybe it’ll bring closure. Maybe not. I just know I need to go there.”
Конец ознакомительного фрагмента.
Текст предоставлен ООО «ЛитРес».
Прочитайте эту книгу целиком, купив полную легальную версию (https://www.litres.ru/elizabeth-sinclair/burning-secrets/) на ЛитРес.
Безопасно оплатить книгу можно банковской картой Visa, MasterCard, Maestro, со счета мобильного телефона, с платежного терминала, в салоне МТС или Связной, через PayPal, WebMoney, Яндекс.Деньги, QIWI Кошелек, бонусными картами или другим удобным Вам способом.