Her Fill-In Fiancé
Stacy Connelly
“Can’t sleep?”
Her heart picked up its pace as Jake stood and crossed the small kitchen to stand in front of her. The single bulb that had seemed bright before now shone like a spotlight, emphasizing his tousled dark blond hair, the rough stubble emphasizing his jaw, the naked chest only inches away, and Sophia couldn’t look away.
“Sophia.” His voice held a hint of warning, and her gaze instantly rose to meet his. The desire she saw there only amplified the longing spinning through her in ever-tightening circles, spiraling down into a pinpoint focus. She wanted him to kiss her. To let the heat and urgency of his mouth against hers wipe away the past weeks. To turn back time to those few, short days when Jake Cameron was a man she could trust, a man she could count on …
Instead of a man who lied.
Dear Reader,
Are you the oldest? The middle? How about the youngest? Research says birth order can affect personality. Firstborns can be demanding, always wanting their way. Second children can be easygoing and seek to avoid confrontation. (OK, I admit, that’s me!) Then you have the last born. The baby left to follow in her siblings’ footsteps or break out on her own.
Sophia Pirelli is the last born and the only girl. Her attempt to break away and find her own place hasn’t worked out. Now she’s returned home to celebrate her parents’ anniversary … and tell her family about her unplanned pregnancy.
When Jake Cameron meets pregnant Sophia, he’s certain he isn’t the man for her. Experience has taught him he’s not a forever guy. But he’ll step in as her fiancé until he can convince Sophia her home town is the perfect place for her and her baby. Only the more time they spend together, the more Sophia sees Jake in a permanent role—as her husband!
I hope you enjoy Sophia and Jake’s journey to finding their own place in the family they create together.
Stacy Connelly
About the Author
STACY CONNELLY has dreamed of publishing books since she was a kid, writing stories about a girl and her horse. Eventually, boys made it onto the page as she discovered a love of romance and the promise of happily ever after.
When she is not lost in the land of make-believe, Stacy lives in Arizona with her two spoiled dogs. She loves to hear from readers and can be contacted at stacyconnelly@cox.net or www.stacyconnelly.com
Her Fill-In Fiancé
Stacy Connelly
www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)
To Christine—
Thanks for sharing your hometown with me.
Chapter One
Pulling into a circa-1950 gas station thirty miles from her hometown, Sophia Pirelli drove to the first of two pumps and dropped her head back against the seat. Tall pines lined the roadside and dotted distant hills. A slight breeze carried their scent, as well as a hint of salt and sand and sea. So close to home, yet she was tempted to gas up and floor it back to St. Louis, where she’d been staying with her cousin, or … or anywhere other than here.
As much as she loved her family, another trip home filled with worried looks and sympathetic, sorrowful “Oh, Sophias” from her parents might be more than she could take. Add in the “I told you so” times three from her older brothers, and she didn’t know how she’d make it through the visit. She could hear Sam, Drew and Nick already.
I told you you wouldn’t like Chicago.
I knew you’d hate being a live-in maid, surrounded by strangers.
If only you’d listened when we told you to stay home.
If only she’d listened …
Her life’s list of if onlys ran the length of her arm, down to the ring she wore as a constant reminder of regret and past mistakes. Sophia twirled the silver band with her thumb as she climbed from the car. She’d known she couldn’t stay away forever, but the nerves tearing her up inside reminded her the old saying was true.
“You can’t go home again,” she murmured as she swiped her credit card.
And as if this first visit home in two years wasn’t going to be hard enough, she had an unplanned pregnancy to confess. Despite the three over-the-counter tests, the doctor’s confirmation and her undeniable morning sickness, Sophia still had a hard time believing she was pregnant. She was alternately thrilled and terrified with both emotions sometimes overwhelming her at once.
But if the idea that she would soon be a mother felt like something out of a dream, then the two months since discovering her pregnancy were straight from a nightmare. She could only imagine the explanation she’d have to give her family.
Yeah, you guys were right. Chicago never did feel like home. I hated living in the Dunworthy mansion surrounded by people who treated me like I was miles beneath them. So, I guess it’s just as well that I got fired for “seducing” Todd, the family’s youngest son, who just so happens to be the father of the child I’m carrying.
That was all a bit much, even for her. Still, she would have to tell them, but not until after her parents’ anniversary party. Their thirty-fifth anniversary …
Vince and Vanessa Pirelli had a great deal to show for those thirty-five years—a strong, love-filled marriage, three handsome, successful sons who lived and worked in their hometown. Nick, the oldest, was the town’s vet. Drew owned his own construction company. Sam was a top mechanic. And then there was Sophia, the baby and black sheep of the family.
She refused to cast a pall over this celebration. She’d done enough of that as a teenager.
“Well, well, if it isn’t little Sophia Pirelli.”
The mocking comment carried across ten feet of asphalt from the small glass-front shop stocked with beer, cigarettes and travel-sized necessities. Sophia didn’t recognize the voice, but it hardly mattered. She turned to face the uniformed attendant, who obviously recognized her. She sneaked a glance at the ragged name tag tacked to the gray, button-down shirt as the man swaggered toward her and wracked her brain for a memory of the brawny, dirty blond-haired man named Bob.
Drawing a blank, she forced a smile and said, “That’s right. You were in my brother’s class at Clearville High, weren’t you?”
Her three older brothers’ combined high school careers spanned nine years. It was a good guess that this man had been a classmate to one if not two of them, but not enough to cover her lack of recognition.
The man gave a scoffing laugh. “You always did think you were too good for the rest of us,” he almost spat.
Heat climbed to Sophia’s cheeks. Any number of denials rose to her throat, but they would have all been lies. Truth was, she had thought she was too good for her small hometown, certain bigger and better things existed in the world outside its close-knit confines, and in high school, she’d made little secret of how she’d felt.
“You and Amy Leary were the Clearville queens, treating the rest of us like your pawns. You didn’t care who got hurt.”
And that was the worst of it, Sophia thought, memories crowding around her until she felt trapped, suffocated. People had gotten hurt.
“Look, Bob—”
“My name is Jeff,” he ground out.
She closed her eyes briefly. “Of course it is,” she murmured beneath her breath, knowing nothing she said would change this man’s opinion of her. An opinion too many people in town shared.
“But you’re not so high and mighty now, are you? I heard you’re nothing but a maid, scrubbing rich people’s gold-trimmed toilets.”
The implied insult stung. Being a maid had never been her dream job, but it was a job that, until Todd came along, she’d done quietly, anonymously, blending into the background, unnoticed by those around her. Almost as if the uniform had the power to make her invisible, which had been fine with Sophia.
After everything that happened in the months before she left Clearville, she’d wanted little more than to disappear.
Reminding herself she’d faced far harsher criticism than anything Bob/Jeff could dole out, she lifted her chin and said, “Actually, I’m not a maid anymore.” A hollow victory since she was unemployed instead, but he didn’t need to know that.
Looking disappointed that his gold-trimmed toilets comment had gone to waste, Jeff demanded, “So what are you doing?”
“Buying gas,” she said as she reached past him and grabbed the pump, “so I can go home to visit my family.”
Maybe it was the reminder of her family, of her brothers, but the man gave her a last disgruntled look before lumbering around to the back of the small shop. For Sophia, though, the damage was already done. Her hand shook so badly it took three tries to get the pump into the tank, and the knots tightening her stomach made morning sickness seem no worse than a hiccup.
Knowing she needed a break before climbing back behind the wheel for the final leg of her journey, Sophia hesitantly approached the shop. She half expected Jeff to jump out from the side of the building and bar her way, but she slipped inside unnoticed. The young girl behind the register didn’t look up from her phone, her fingers flying across the tiny keyboard, as Sophia ducked down the first aisle and into the restroom with a relieved sigh.
Was this what her whole trip would be like? Hiding out and doing her best to dodge her past?
The trill of her cell phone offered a welcome distraction, and she reached inside for her purse. When she saw her cousin’s number, Sophia winced. Thanks to spotty reception and Theresa’s work schedule, they’d been playing phone tag most of the trip. She flipped open the phone, already knowing she was going to get an earful.
“Where are you?” Theresa demanded in place of a normal greeting.
“I’m less than an hour from home,” Sophia said as she tucked the phone against her shoulder and turned on the faucet to wash her hands.
“What’s happened? What went wrong?”
“Nothing went wrong, but thanks for expecting the worst,” Sophia said.
“I didn’t say you did something wrong. But you should have been home by now. We plotted out your route before you left and figured how long it would take.”
Theresa had plotted; Sophia had tossed the detailed directions into the back seat where they’d remained. “You also told me to take it easy. No need to hurry, remember?”
“I remember. But at no time did I say to drag your feet the whole way or to delay the inevitable for as long as possible.”
Sophia wanted to argue, but her cousin knew her too well.
She glanced at her reflection over the utilitarian sink, seeing her short, dark hair, her brown eyes, the slight upward tilt to her nose. She looked a little pale, a little tired, but nothing out of the ordinary. Nothing hinting at the news she had to share. Still, it was almost like looking into a two-way mirror with Theresa on the other side, seeing all her doubts, her insecurities, her reluctance …
“You have to tell your family the truth.”
“I know, Theresa,” Sophia said, squelching a touch of irritation. Easy for Theresa to say. She wasn’t the one with the big secrets. No, Theresa was the one with the college degree and the good job. But she was also the one who’d welcomed Sophia into her home in St. Louis when she’d been fired by the Dunworthys.
Irritation fading away, Sophia said, “And I would have had to tell them a month ago if you hadn’t let me stay with you. If I haven’t thanked you for that, I should have. I really appreciate you taking me in for the second time.”
Five years ago, when she first left Clearville, she’d gone to live with Theresa in Chicago, where her cousin had been going to college. The move was supposed to be a chance to start over, to wipe the slate clean. For a while, Sophia supposed she’d succeeded, only to mess the whole thing up again, prompting yet another flight to her cousin, who was now living and working in St. Louis.
“You already thanked me, and you know my door is always open. But you can’t keep hiding.”
“I’m not. I’m going to tell my parents everything.” Eventually … Turning away from her reflection, Sophia left the restroom as Theresa pleaded, “Well, at least tell them the truth about Jake Cameron. Every time I talk to my mother, she raves about how handsome and charming he is.” Sarcasm coated her words as she affected her mother’s husky voice. “She can’t stop gloating that she got to be the first one in the family to meet him.”
Her cousin’s tone softened as she added, “I know how hard it’s going to be to tell them all that’s happened. And the news about the baby shouldn’t be done over the phone. But this stuff with Jake …”
This stuff with Jake … Sophia’s heart spasmed at the very mention of his name, and her hand tightened on the phone. She wished she could dismiss Jake Cameron as easily as Theresa had, but Sophia didn’t know how she was supposed to do that. Every thought, every memory, every reminder of the time they spent together made it hard to breathe, and yet she couldn’t stop thinking about him.
Maybe it was an unforeseen drawback of the years she’d spent as a maid; maybe it was a reaction to the way Todd Dunworthy had treated her and the news of the baby she carried—like dirty secrets to be swept under the carpet. Sophia wasn’t sure. All she knew was that the first time Jake smiled at her, the first time he looked at her with those gorgeous, almost golden eyes, she’d felt he could see the real Sophia.
Not the Pirellis’ little girl. Not the screwup kid sister.
In Jake’s eyes, she saw a strong, confident woman reflected back at her. She saw—or she thought she saw—an interest and a desire that made her feel noticed for the first time in a long time.
She’d done her best to downplay her feelings for Jake after he left. But what else could she do? Sophia thought. She didn’t have any idea how to explain to Theresa her bone-deep certainty that Jake Cameron was a man she could count on, one she could trust, one who would never hurt her. She had yet to figure it out for herself … especially since it turned out none of those things were true.
Once again, she’d trusted the wrong person, only to be let down in the worst possible way.
As for why she hadn’t told her family about him, well, that one was a lot easier to understand, Sophia thought as she left the store. Her aunt Donna had met Jake when she was visiting from Palm Springs. And Donna had been as charmed as Theresa said. She’d immediately called Clearville, armed with stories about Sophia finally meeting a “nice man.”
In truth, Jake Cameron was nothing more than a liar and a fraud, but Aunt Donna didn’t know that. She thought he was charming, smart, handsome …
“I just don’t get it.” Her cousin sucked in a quick breath, then hesitated as if debating what she wanted to say next. “You’re not hoping that he’ll, I don’t know, have some crazy explanation and that you guys can pick up where you left off—”
“No! Of course not. Nothing he could say would make a bit of difference,” she insisted. She hit the button on her keychain remote, the beep of the alarm sounding the exclamation point on her statement.
“Okay. Good.” Theresa gave a sigh of relief. “Because that’s pretty much what I told him when he called.”
“He called?” Sophia demanded, hating the way her heartbeat quickened at the thought. “When?” She slid into the driver’s seat, her legs suddenly weak.
After he left St. Louis, Jake had left a few messages. Sophia ignored the calls and they quickly stopped, convincing her she’d done the right thing in refusing to hear out his vague promise of an explanation.
“Yesterday … and maybe a couple of times before that.”
“What do you mean, a couple of times?” Sophia asked suspiciously.
“You said you didn’t want to talk to him.”
“So you didn’t bother telling me he called?”
“Would you have called him back?”
“No. Maybe. I don’t know. But you didn’t have the right to make that decision for me, Theresa.”
“I was trying to look out for you. If you didn’t want to talk to him—”
“Not the point,” Sophia argued. “And by the way, you’re really starting to sound like my brothers.”
“That’s not fair.”
Probably not, but this close to home, she was already on the defensive. Despite her poor choices in the present and the past, she needed to prove that she could take care of herself … and the baby she carried.
Taking a breath, she said, “I’m sorry. But if he calls again, let me know, okay? Even if I have no intention of returning his call,” she added quickly, then wondered which of them she was trying to convince.
She had no reason to call Jake back. Everything about their relationship had been a lie. So why did she still miss him so much? Why did she still long to hear the sound of his voice?
Because she was an even bigger fool than she wanted to admit, that was why! Big enough of a fool that she’d daydreamed about how her trip home would be easier with Jake by her side. How his thoughtfulness and charm would impress her mother…. How his wry sense of humor would win over her father…. How his confidence and strength could withstand whatever her sometimes obnoxious, oftentimes macho brothers might throw at him….
“I’ve always wondered what it would be like to have a big family,” he’d told her after listening to one of her childhood memories.
“I’d be happy to share mine,” she’d answered, her words not entirely a joke because she’d fooled herself into believing there’d been a yearning hidden in his eyes that might make the impossible possible.
Her cheeks burned with the memory, but anger served its purpose, withering the unwanted seeds of hope that blossomed inside her simply because he’d called a few times.
“All right. I’ll let you know if he calls again,” her cousin said, grudgingly enough to tell Sophia her feelings were still hurt. “I have to work tonight, but leave me a message when you get to Clearville.”
As she dropped her phone back in her purse, Sophia admitted she really shouldn’t have jumped on Theresa for keeping secrets. Not when she had so many of her own.
And certainly not when she wasn’t planning to come clean on all of them. Oh, she’d tell her family about losing her job in Chicago. And of course, she would tell them about the pregnancy. But about Jake—the truth about Jake Cameron was one secret Sophia planned on keeping.
Yes, he was a liar and a total jerk. But that didn’t really matter.
All that mattered was that her aunt had met Jake. She thought he was a nice guy. So who did it hurt if her family believed they were still dating? If her family thought, maybe, they were even falling in love? Was it really so bad of her to want to have one bright spot to point to? A single light at the end of the tunnel?
No one needed to know she’d already been run over by the train.
After the long, drawn-out days of traveling—Theresa had been right to accuse her of dragging her feet—Sophia should have been eager to have the trip behind her. She should have been grateful to escape her tiny cramped car; she should have longed for a half-hour soak in a tub instead of a five-minute shower with limited heat and water pressure; she should have been looking forward to spending the night in a comfortable, familiar bed.
She would find all of that at her parents’ house, and yet she dreaded seeing her family, fielding all their questions and admitting to a truth that made her feel so, so stupid.
It would have been bad enough if she were the only one affected, but she wasn’t. The child she carried would have to live with it as well, and the questions she dreaded her family asking would be nothing compared to those her child might ask six or seven years down the road.
So maybe she could use this trip as something of a test drive, a practice run long before she had to tell her child.
Pulling up to her parents’ sprawling white-sided farmhouse with its green shutters and wraparound front porch, Sophia cut the engine and took a deep breath. The house showed signs of a facelift. Nothing dramatic, but Sophia could see the paint was new, the old wrought iron railing had been replaced by a white wooden picket fence, and the stairs leading to the porch no longer sagged in the middle. Terra cotta flower pots filled with petunias, snapdragons and vinca lined the steps in welcome, and the huge, green lawn stretched out on either side of the house before giving way to uncultivated wilderness.
She could think of dozens of descriptions, but only one word came to mind.
Home.
“Here we go, baby.”
She patted her tummy, then grabbed her purse and climbed from the car, leaving her suitcases behind in the trunk. Big, burly brothers were good for a few things, after all. And Sophia didn’t doubt her brothers would be at the house. Sunday night dinners were legendary in the Pirelli household. Her mother always made enough food to feed an army. And over the years, between her brothers’ friends, girlfriends and later, at least in Nick’s case, family, an army of guests had frequently shown up, often out of the blue.
And Vanessa Pirelli always greeted her guests—expected or not—with a smile and a homemade meal.
“Spaghetti,” Sophia whispered as she walked toward the front door. “Please be having spaghetti.”
Not only because she’d missed her mother’s spaghetti, unable to imitate the handed-down family recipe no matter how many times she tried, but because the meal was her brothers’ favorite. Her mother often joked that a bomb could go off, and none of them would drop a fork.
Sophia hoped her mother was right, and she could drop a couple of her bombs without her brothers going ballistic. Sam, any chance you’ll save some meatballs for the rest of us … and oh, by the way, I was fired from my job. Drew, pass the milk, will you? I’m supposed to get more calcium, being pregnant and all.
And her parents … she could already imagine the disappointment in their eyes.
Her insides churning, her steps had slowed to a shuffle as she crossed the porch. The hoped-for aroma of simmering tomato sauce and garlic bread didn’t immediately tease her senses as she opened the front door and stepped inside. Sophia sniffed, but she couldn’t smell anything cooking at all. Nor did she hear the usual sounds of a Pirelli dinner, the clink of glasses, the scrape of silverware against china, the arguments between Nick and Drew over sports, the arguments between Sam and everyone over anything.
The updates to the outside of the house continued inside. The hardwood floors gleamed beneath a new coat of stain and faintly striped wallpaper brought out the floral patterns in the chintz sofa and armchairs. But the focal point of the room, a family portrait hanging above the red brick fireplace mantel, remained.
Taken several years ago, the portrait showed her three brothers in back. Nick, the oldest, was in the middle, flanked on either side by Drew, who shared Nick’s dark coloring, and by Sam, the only blond-haired one in the bunch. Her parents were seated in front of the boys—her father, an older, leaner version of his sons, his thick dark hair sprinkled with gray and laugh lines around his dark-brown eyes, and her mother, as petite as her husband and sons were tall, her chestnut hair cut in a sleek bob to frame her round face and green eyes. Sophia sat front and center, her dark hair longer back then, smiling at the camera with all the confidence of an eighteen-year-old kid ready to conquer the world.
Sophia sighed. Little had she known.
Walking toward the back of the house, she expected to find some member of her family—her parents would never dream of eating out on a Sunday night. But the comfortable kitchen, with its oak cabinets, matching table and chairs and green gingham accents, was empty.
Sophia turned in a circle, feeling somewhat lost in her childhood home, until the sound of laughter rang in the distance. With a glance at the back door, she smiled despite the churning in her stomach. Of course. The weather was perfect for a barbecue, and grilling outdoors was the one chance her mother had in getting someone else to cook a meal.
Plastering on a smile, Sophia opened the back door and stepped out onto the porch. “Hey, everybody, I’m home,” she announced, preparing for the usual enthusiastic greetings that never failed to disguise the worry and question in her family’s eyes.
Shouts of “Sweetheart!” “Squirt!” and “Fifi!” rang out, the last despised nickname coming from Sam, who called her that only to annoy her.
But one voice she never expected to hear spoke quietly in her ear. “Hello, Sophia.”
Speechless, she turned and gazed into Jake Cameron’s amber eyes.
Chapter Two
Jake Cameron. Here. At her parents’ house. With her family. Wearing—was that her mother’s apron? Sophia blinked hard, twice, but when she opened her eyes, Jake still stood mere inches away, his expression serious despite the frilly white apron covered by pink potbellied pigs.
She was dreaming. Her foolish, foolish wish of having Jake accompany her to her parents’ house had slipped into her subconscious, where she was too vulnerable to keep the ridiculous hope at bay. That was the only possible explanation. She was still asleep at some by-the-highway hotel, her face smashed into a cheap pillow, having a doozy of a nightmare. The breeze carried the scent of charcoal and the sounds of her family’s greetings, but none of it was real.
Jake even looked as he always did in her dreams—too tempting for her peace of mind and too good to be true, she thought, her hungry gaze taking in rugged features that had become breathtakingly familiar in such a short time. The setting sun burnished his brown hair, bringing out the highlights in the slightly shaggy strands, and turning his skin to gold. Faint lines fanned out from his whiskey-colored eyes, hinting at a smile that could flash lightning quick or start her body on a slow burn with sexy, seductive deliberation.
If she closed her eyes, she could still feel the heated promise of his lips against hers in intoxicating kisses that made her forget the harsh lessons of the past. But she didn’t need to close her eyes because she was already asleep. Sophia was sure of it …
Until Jake reached out, trailed his fingers down the all-too-sensitive inside of her arm and took her hand. Her heart slammed in her chest, hard enough to stop its beat and steal her breath, and Sophia knew this was happening, this was real. Because nothing—not a dream, not a nightmare, not a figment of her imagination—could affect her like this.
Nothing but living, breathing, flesh-and-blood Jake Cameron could make her feel this way.
Sophia jerked her hand from his as she choked out in a whisper, “What—what are you doing here?”
Before Jake had the chance to answer, Sam bounded up the back steps to the small landing. “We didn’t know you’d be bringing company, but hey! More the merrier!” Sam slapped Jake on the back hard enough to knock a smaller man aside, but Jake absorbed the blow with little reaction. Her brother dropped a kiss on her cheek as he brushed by. “Good to see you, Fifi. And about time, too.”
Sophia could barely manage a response to her brother’s greeting. She’d imagined dozens of scenarios where she had a chance to confront Jake Cameron and let him have it for lying to her. In those somewhat vengeful daydreams, she was sharp, clever and cutting enough to bring him to his knees. Never, though, in any of those scenes had she pictured a moment like this.
“Let me guess,” she said, a hint of hysteria creeping into her voice, “the apron was Sam’s idea.”
Jake glanced down at the parade of pigs. “He said it was the only one.” His knowing look told Sophia he hadn’t believed it for a second, but then again—
“Takes one to know one,” she muttered beneath her breath, but not so quietly that Jake didn’t still hear, judging by the muscle tightening in his jaw.
As the screen door slammed shut behind Sam, Sophia gradually became aware of the rest of her family. Nick and Drew had apparently been in the middle of a supposedly touch football game, judging by the grass stains on Drew’s jeans and the ball tucked beneath Nick’s arm. Her father stood at the grill Jake had abandoned and her mother and Nick’s daughter, Maddie, had been sitting beneath the gazebo off to the side of the yard.
At Sophia’s arrival, though, everyone charged en masse, giving Jake little time to reply and Sophia less time to prepare. She’d barely made it down the back steps when her mother and niece reached her, Vanessa hugging her shoulders while seven-year-old Maddie wrapped her skinny arms around her waist. “Sophia! It’s so good to see you. I’ve missed you.”
Wrapped in a cloud of cinnamon-scented warmth, Sophia swallowed hard. “Missed you too, Mom.”
Vanessa Pirelli pulled back, her green eyes taking quick inventory of her only daughter. Sophia instinctively stiffened as she waited for the questions to cloud her mother’s expression with worry. Was she okay? Was she in trouble? Had she fallen in with the wrong crowd again?
To Sophia’s surprise, and for the first time in years, disappointment failed to dim the light in her mother’s eyes. Not until her mother included Jake in her happy gaze did Sophia fully understand why. “Wasn’t it sweet of Jake to surprise you like this?”
“It’s a surprise,” she agreed, avoiding the “sweet” description when it came to Jake Cameron.
Her fault, of course, for letting the deception go on as long as she had. Was there some ugly, painful stone in her dismal love life he’d somehow left unturned? He was headed for disappointment. She’d spilled her heart to him already.
She’d foolishly felt she owed him the truth—that she was being unfair to start any kind of relationship without telling Jake about the child she carried. Turned out she didn’t owe him at all. He was already getting paid, and how unfair was that?
She felt Jake’s intense gaze on the side of her face, as if his golden eyes gave off as much heat as the man himself, but she refused to glance his way. Struggling for normalcy in front of her family, Sophia focused on her niece. She cupped the girl’s dimpled chin in her hand and exclaimed, “Maddie, I think you’ve grown a foot since I saw you last!”
“I’m starting third grade soon! I’ll be in Mrs. Dawson’s class,” the tiny, girlish version of her big brother said, her whole body practically vibrating with excitement. In Clearville’s small elementary school, first and second grades were housed together in the same classroom. Entering third grade was an enormous step.
“You’re one of the big kids now!” Sophia exclaimed. “Practically all grown up!”
“It’s amazing how fast kids change when you aren’t around to see it,” Nick drawled, shifting the football to his other hand to draw his daughter to his side.
Sophia had to give him credit; she might have actually believed the casual comment was nothing more than that if she didn’t know better. But she did. Her oldest brother still blamed her for taking off to Chicago and for the fallout she hadn’t intended to cause.
But any defense Sophia might have made collapsed at the combination of love, pride and well-disguised worry that mingled in his gaze as he looked down at his daughter. “She’ll be in college before I know it.”
Sophia’s heart clenched in sympathy for what Nick had gone through since his wife left, in guilt for her part in Carol’s desertion, and in a newly realized panic knowing she’d be feeling that same love, that same pride, that same worry soon for her own child. Like Nick, she too would be alone.
Sophia swallowed hard, and it had to be her imagination that Jake stepped closer as if sensing her thoughts and offering his silent support.
Crazy, she thought. If Jake could read her mind, he’d run the other way. Because she was still mad at him. Really, really mad.
Mad enough to haul off and hit him. Mad enough to throw herself into his arms, close her eyes, and pretend the Jake Cameron she’d met in St. Louis was the real Jake Cameron …
“Hey, Jake!” Her dad waved a barbecue fork in their direction. “How ‘bout you take over here and give me a chance to hug my little girl?”
“You got it, Vince. Be right there.”
Trying to keep her jaw from dropping at the warm welcome embracing Jake, Sophia shot him a sidelong glance he caught front and center. He stepped closer until she had to tilt her head back to meet his gaze. She’d lived with older and much taller brothers her entire life; she was used to their overwhelming breadth and height.
But with Jake, it was … different.
Intimidating and at the same time thrilling in ways she wished she could forget.
“I’ve missed you,” he murmured, his deep voice tripping over nerve endings and raising goose bumps across her skin.
Fury at her reaction as much as at his words reared, and Sophia sucked in a breath, sharp retort at the ready. But before she could say a single word, Jake caught the back of her neck, his fingers tunneling in her dark hair, and pulled her into a quick, hard kiss.
She barely had the chance to register his taste, to respond to the press of his mouth against hers, to relive the memory of the kisses they’d shared in St. Louis. Kisses that slipped beneath her defenses, exploited her weaknesses …
She drew in a second breath as she pulled back, still ready to blast him with her temper, still furious, but Jake had already stepped away.
“Jake, I can’t tell you what a pleasure it is to have you here.” Vanessa Pirelli’s warm smile left no room to doubt the sincerity of her words.
Seated across from Sophia’s mother, Jake worked on a smile of his own. The casual meal around the picnic table was nothing like the formal family dinners in the Cameron household. Her welcoming acceptance should have made it easier, but the whole experience of holding hands while saying grace, passing rolls across the table like lobbing softballs and carrying on four conversations at one time seemed like something out of a storybook.
And of course every story had its villain, a role Jake had been fully willing to accept when he showed up unannounced at Sophia’s home. But instead of hurling accusations, her family had greeted him with open arms—literally—leaving him feeling off-balance and unprepared. He’d been ready to face the Pirelli family’s anger; their approval was unexpected … and undeserved.
Still, he said, “I’m glad to be here, Mrs. Pirelli.”
Glad to see for himself that Sophia had a family who loved her, who would be there for her and her child in a way only family could be. She might not have told them about the baby yet, but it was obvious Sophia’s child would have three doting uncles and one set of grandparents to spoil him rotten and to be there for anything he needed.
“Oh, now, didn’t I tell you to call me Vanessa?” Sophia’s mother reminded him.
“Yes, ma’am, you did.”
His evasion didn’t get by the older woman, and her eyes crinkled in a smile, small lines forming at the corners, giving him a glimpse of how beautiful Sophia would look as she matured. Only Sophia certainly wasn’t smiling at him now.
Sitting stiff and silent at his side, Sophia’s body language told him loud and clear she didn’t share in her mother’s welcome. But not even her anger and the obvious emotional walls stopped him from noticing the way her dark hair curled behind her ear to perfectly frame her delicate features. Or the way the afternoon breeze picked up the fresh vanilla scent of her skin. Or the heat of her body inches from his.
When she reached out to pass the potato salad and brushed her arm against his, every hair on his body seemed to stand at attention—thousands of tiny divining rods guiding him to the woman at his side. A woman he’d told himself a hundred times since leaving St. Louis he was better off staying away from. Yet here he was, sitting by her side like a man who’d been out in the desert too long and yet somehow thought he could ignore the temptation of taking a drink.
He hadn’t even made it five minutes before kissing her, Jake thought wryly, unable to resist putting his memory to the test to see if Sophia’s lips truly were as sweet and soft as he recalled. Even that brief taste told him what he’d already come to suspect in the days since he left St. Louis: memories were no substitute for the real thing. The real thing he’d found in Sophia …
Jake shoved the thought aside. He wasn’t some starry-eyed romantic. He didn’t believe in love at first sight. He wasn’t sure he believed in love at all.
His only experience with the painful emotion had been Mollie. At the time, he’d certainly thought he loved her and trusted she felt the same. But that day at the hospital, she’d made it more than clear how she really felt about him.
You aren’t a family man, Jake. You don’t have any idea what it’s like to be part of a family, but that’s what I need. That’s what Josh and I both need.
And that was what Sophia needed, too.
She needed her family to rally around her, and if playing her boyfriend made this reunion a little easier on her, well, he could fill in for now. He could take on the part until she found someone better suited. Much like Mollie had.
Slipping back into a role that had become too familiar too fast in St. Louis, Jake returned Vanessa’s smile. “Sophia’s told me so much about you, and I couldn’t wait to meet you all.”
“You’ll have to make sure Sophia shows you around while she’s here. Last time she was home, she didn’t do much more than hide away in her room.”
“Sam!” his mother admonished, but whatever the reason for the sudden silence that fell over the table, Sam seemed as ignorant of its cause as Jake.
“What?” the youngest of the Pirelli brothers asked. “I’m just saying.”
“Can you blame her?” Drew slugged his younger brother on the shoulder. “She was probably hiding out from you.”
Jake had already figured out that Sam was the joker, Drew something of a peacemaker, while Nick—Nick he had yet to figure out. The eldest Pirelli brother obviously adored his daughter and got along well with the rest of his family, but Jake sensed a tension between Nick and Sophia, a distance the family clearly talked around, as they did the absence of Maddie’s mother.
“So, Jake, what is it you do?” Sophia’s father asked as he dug in to the potato salad.
He knew from what Sophia had told him that Nick was a veterinarian, Drew a custom-home builder and Sam a mechanic. But Jake didn’t know what she’d told her family about him.
Buying some time, he took a huge bite of the hamburger he’d piled high with lettuce, cheese, avocado and tomatoes. The flavors exploded against his tongue, tasting better than anything he’d had to eat since—since the last meal he shared with Sophia.
They’d gone to a barbecue place not far from her cousin’s house. It had been the final time Sophia looked at him without suspicion, anger and distrust filling her expression. He’d told her the truth the next day, but he had no idea if she’d told her family about his occupation.
Unfortunately, Sophia didn’t seem the least bit inclined to jump in and save him. She was focused on her own burger, sans any toppings, a preference he remembered from a hot dog she’d ordered at a Cardinals game. Almost embarrassed, she’d confessed, “What can I say? I have boring tastes.”
Jake hadn’t found anything at all boring about Sophia Pirelli, and he’d declared her a hot dog purist. Laughing in response, she’d comically piled every condiment known to man on the hot dog he’d purchased while he made a big deal about covering hers with a napkin to maintain its pristine, natural state …
“Um, Jake,” Sophia finally prompted. “My dad was asking about your job.”
“Yeah, sorry about that.” Jake swallowed the last of the huge bite he’d taken. “My mother would be appalled by my manners.”
“Mom’s always appalled by our manners,” Sam interjected, clearly unconcerned as he grabbed a cherry tomato from the salad bowl and popped it into his mouth.
Vanessa rolled her eyes. “Isn’t that the truth?”
“Anyway,” Jake began after he’d stalled as long as he could and hoping he’d picked up correctly on the slight disapproval in Sophia’s voice when she mentioned his job. “I’m a private investigator.”
“Seriously? That must be so cool,” Sam declared.
“Yes, Jake, tell Sam how cool your job is,” Sophia said, a challenging lift to her eyebrows.
He was still scrambling for something to say that would appease her brothers’ curiosity without further alienating Sophia when Vince asked his daughter, “Why is now the first we’re hearing of this? Sophia, why didn’t you tell us what Jake does for a living? For all we knew, he could have been an accountant.”
Sophia picked at the sesame seeds on her hamburger bun and complained, “What’s wrong with being an accountant?”
“Other than being totally boring?” Sam asked before turning back to Jake. “What was your most interesting case?”
Jake didn’t have to even think about it. “That would have to be the case that took me to St. Louis.”
Sophia’s head snapped toward him, her dark gaze pleading, as if she expected him to blurt out the whole story to her family right there at the dinner table. Any why not? he thought with regret. That was pretty much what he’d done to her …
Sam leaned forward. “What happened in St. Louis?”
Reaching out, Jake lifted Sophia’s hand from the picnic table and entwined her fingers with his own. “That’s where I met your sister,” he murmured.
The worry eased from her expression, and was it his imagination or had her eyes softened just a little? Despite the elbow-to-elbow contact at the table, her family seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of them and the spark that had ignited between them the moment they met, an attraction that made it easy for Sophia to trust him, an attraction that made it so easy for Jake to lie to her.
He didn’t know which of them flinched first, but the break in contact as Sophia’s hand fell to her side made Jake feel like some vital part of him had been ripped away, leaving behind only scars as reminders of all he’d lost. Because of his lies and because of the truth he’d been asked to find.
Dammit, Sophia, I’m sorry, he thought, staring at her downcast profile as if he might will her into accepting his apology. Sorry I’m not the man you thought I was.
He did his best to deflect the rest of her family’s questions about his job and thought he’d just about turned the tide when Maddie’s young voice piped in.
“Have you ever been shot?”
The little girl had been tossing bits of her bun at a couple of birds, and Jake hadn’t thought she’d been listening to the conversation. When all adult eyes focused on her, she added, “You know, like on TV.”
Instinctively, his hand moved to his left thigh. Sometimes he swore he could still feel the bullet burning beneath his flesh even though he knew that was impossible…. A soft intake of breath beside him caught his attention. Sophia straightened in realization, and he could almost hear yet another mark checked off against him for yet another lie.
He was spared from having to satisfy Maddie’s childish curiosity when Vanessa turned on her eldest son. “Honestly, Nick, what have you been letting this child watch?”
“I didn’t let her. I didn’t know she was paying any attention,” Nick protested.
Thinking it was a good time to turn the conversation away from himself while he still could, Jake asked, “What about you, Vince? What do you do?”
For the first time since he met the Pirelli family, silence fell.
Sophia might not think much of Jake’s job, but up until recently, he’d been good at it. And he could still pick up on body language and small nuances most people missed. Like the encouraging smile Vanessa sent her husband’s way. Like the look Sam and Drew exchanged, and Nick’s brief but pointed glance at Sophia, who kept her own eyes focused on her plate. Only Maddie was immune, singing beneath her breath and turning her attention back to her gathering flock.
Vince’s smile was wide as ever, but something less than genuine as he said, “Used to manage the grocery store in town, but now I’m retired. I get to be a full-time husband and father, much to my wife and kids’ dismay.”
Vanessa and his sons immediately protested, but Sophia stayed stone silent at Jake’s side until she stood abruptly and practically scrambled over the picnic bench. She grabbed her glass of lemonade. “I need a refill. I’ll be right back. Can I get anyone anything from the kitchen?” She barely waited for her family to reply before backing away from the table.
Jake stood before she made her escape. “I’ll join you.”
She opened her mouth to demur, but he shot a quick glance at her family and the protest she would have made transformed into a smile. “Thank you, Jake.”
“You’re welcome,” he said, wondering if he was the only one to notice how she spoke the words through gritted teeth.
He caught her hand as they crossed the lush green lawn toward the kitchen, but it was Sophia who practically dragged him the last few yards into the house. She whirled on him the moment the door closed, secluding them in the homey kitchen.
Her color was high and her dark eyes snapping as she bit out, “Football injury?”
“What?”
“The night we met, you said you were limping because of a football injury!”
Of all the explanations he owed Sophia, that was by far the last he’d expected her to demand. He’d passed off his injury with the half-joking cliché rather than tell the truth. But the worry shining through her anger was far worse than facing the memories of the job that had gone wrong in Mexico only a few weeks before he met Sophia.
“I wasn’t lying when I told you I was fine. I am,” he insisted, wondering if he wasn’t trying to convince himself. Physically, yes, he was healing. But how many times had he awakened in a cold sweat, grabbing at his leg, feeling the pain of the bullet buried deep inside? He thought he’d put those nightmares to rest, but they’d come back with a vengeance since he left St. Louis. Since he’d left Sophia.
She stared up at him as if trying to see right through him and straight into all the uncertainty inside. But he’d gotten good over the years at hiding; it was part of his job, sure, but more than that, it was part of who he was. And he was pretty sure he didn’t give anything away when he repeated, “I’m fine.”
For a moment, she looked ready to argue, the fine line between her eyebrows a dead giveaway of the stubbornness he’d caught a glimpse of a time or two in St. Louis. But then she changed tactics as she got to the point. “What are you doing here, Jake?”
He’d asked that question as he traveled to Clearville and still wasn’t sure he’d come up with an adequate answer to satisfy himself, let alone one Sophia would accept. All he knew was that the hurt in her eyes when he’d blurted out the truth had haunted him since he’d left, and he couldn’t stand the thought of that being his last memory of Sophia. So here he was, standing in the kitchen of her childhood home, ready to give an explanation she didn’t want to hear. An apology she wouldn’t accept.
Her crossed arms, raised chin and closed expression all told him she wasn’t going to listen to anything he had to say. Not here, not now. But he had time … if he dared to take it.
“What am I doing?” he echoed. “I’m enjoying your family’s company. I’d expected I’d have to fight through your brothers to see you—” his eyebrow rose in question “—but for some crazy reason, they think we’re dating.”
Evading his gaze, she focused on a wall clock shaped like a rooster. Color slowly faded from her cheeks, along with her previous fire, and Jake dropped any hint of teasing. “What’s going on, Sophia?”
She shook her head and swallowed. “It’s like you said. My family still thinks we’re dating … for the crazy reason that I haven’t told them otherwise.”
“Just like you haven’t told them what happened in Chicago or that you’re no longer working for the Dunworthys.” From what he gathered in passing conversations, her family had no idea Sophia had been fired … or the reason why. The Pirellis seemed to think Sophia was on paid leave while her employers vacationed overseas.
“Yet another proud moment in my life,” she muttered. Her embarrassment and disappointment was obvious in the slump to her shoulders and downcast eyes. Jake felt his heart lurch as if urging him to do something. Uncertain what else he could offer, he quietly asked, “Do you want me to tell your family what happened?”
Dragging her gaze from the ceramic tile that had replaced the worn linoleum floor of her childhood, Sophia stared up at Jake Cameron, a man who knew the worst and best of the secrets she still hadn’t told her family. A man who was a virtual stranger—since for all she knew everything he’d told her was a lie, a man who treated getting shot like a paper cut—and the urge to escape overwhelmed her. She spun toward the door, but her family still waited outside. The trapped, suffocating feeling she’d had as a teenager closed in on her, reminding her of all the reasons why she’d run from Clearville years ago.
But a different edge raced along the fine blade of tension now, one she’d never felt before meeting Jake. A fear that running would never be enough until she found some place—someone—she could run to. She shoved the ridiculous thought aside and took a deep breath that teased her senses with the hint of Jake’s woodsy aftershave combined with the smoke from the charcoal—a scent more appetizing than the burgers he’d grilled.
“Do you want me to?” he asked again, stepping close enough for her to feel the heat of his body running down her spine, buttocks and the backs of her thighs. She turned to face him, realizing too late the temptation of his broad chest was just a deep breath away from her breasts and his lips hovered just out of reach of her own … unless she stood on tiptoe, as she’d learned the night of their second date.
“Sophia?”
“What?” Sophia demanded, horrified she’d somehow given her desire away.
“Do you want me to tell your family?” he repeated, a slight frown coming to his handsome face.
Feeling her cheeks burn, she shook her head to clear her heated thoughts. “Of course not,” she scoffed, though she was a bit tempted to dump all the responsibility on Jake. But she wasn’t that big of a coward. “They’re my family. I’ll tell them.”
His golden gaze searched hers, his expression more enigmatic than she’d ever seen in St. Louis. For those few short weeks, he’d struck her as completely sincere, honest and easy to read. It hurt all over again to realize not only his words had been a lie. Everything about the Jake Cameron she’d met, the Jake Cameron she’d liked had been a con.
“Or …” His voice trailed off, dangling the bait of an answer she had yet to consider.
“Or what?”
“Or you could let them believe we’re still seeing each other until you’re ready to tell the truth.”
That had been her plan all along, hadn’t it? Easing into the truth like dipping a toe into the shock of an icy pond instead of diving in headlong. But looking up into the intensity of Jake’s golden gaze, she felt the heat of his stare searching her face before settling on her mouth. A sudden trembling attacked her legs and threatened her ability to stand. Desperate to fight off that weakness before Jake could see how easily he still affected her, Sophia mocked, “You mean pretend to be dating? Well, you’d certainly be good at it.”
His jaw tightened to the point where she expected to hear his molars crack, but when he spoke, his voice was as deep and calm as ever. “You have a choice, Sophia.”
His gaze shifted to a spot over her shoulder, and she glanced back. The lace curtain over the back door window offered a snowy, diffused view of her family outside. Sam and Drew were telling some story that had both her parents laughing. Even Nick looked like he was enjoying himself.
Once again, she would be the one changing that, wiping away their happiness and replacing it with worry and disappointment. Swallowing, she turned away and looked back at Jake. “Why would you do this?”
“Let’s just say I owe you,” he said. “There is a condition, though.”
“Figures,” she muttered. “What’s the condition?”
“I want to know why you’ve let your family believe we’re still seeing each other.”
Tell Jake or tell her entire family? Math had never been her favorite subject, but even she could do those calculations. “You remember meeting my aunt Donna when she came to visit Theresa?” At Jake’s nod, Sophia said, “Well, she definitely remembers meeting you. All she could talk about was what a great guy you are.”
Jake flinched at her words, and for the first time, Sophia wondered if his guilt and regret might be the real thing.
That, or he’s playing you, a cynical voice warned. The same way he played you from the moment you met … or maybe even before that.
It wasn’t like her to view every action with suspicion and doubt, but she’d been burned too many times before. If she let herself believe anything Jake said, she’d only be setting herself up for another heartache.
“Sophia—”
She shook her head, cutting off an apology she couldn’t afford to accept. “My parents have been married for thirty-five years. I know how rare that is in this day and age, but in my family, people still believe that’s the way it’s supposed to be. That marriage is for life and family means everything. How am I supposed to admit that I’m pregnant and that the father of my child will always be this nameless, faceless nonentity in our lives? In my child’s life?”
Sophia didn’t mean for the words to keep spilling out, but once she started, she couldn’t seem to stop. “But you! See, my aunt Donna met you! She thought you were a nice guy. I even had a few pictures from when we went out—to the ballgame, and the zoo.” Sophia shook her head. “You were a single bright spot amid everything that was going wrong in my life and—it was stupid to think that would be enough. But, I don’t know, it just seemed like better than nothing.”
Her hands dropped uselessly to her sides, and she glanced up at Jake, anticipating his reaction. What she saw, though, was the last thing she expected. Tension had taken hold of his body, leaving behind taut lines of muscle and bone. “Jake—”
The back door opened before she could say anything more. Sam bounded inside, nearly running her down. “Sorry, sis,” he said as he caught her by the shoulders and steered her out of the way. Breaking up the tense moment with typical oblivion, he headed for the refrigerator. “Maddie says there’s cake for dessert.”
Her mother followed a moment later. Far more perceptive than Sam—but who wasn’t?—she looked back and forth between Sophia and Jake. “Is everything all right?”
Jake gave an abrupt nod as he escaped from the kitchen. Meeting her mother’s puzzled look, Sophia forced a smile and said, “I’m, um, a little tired from the trip. I’d like to go lie down for awhile.”
“Oh, of course. Are your bags still in the car?”
“In the trunk,” she said.
“Sam, go get your sister’s luggage when you’re done in here.”
Backing out of the refrigerator with the sheet cake, Sam said, “Will do.”
Her mother linked her arm through Sophia’s. “Your room is ready. If you need anything—well,” she said with a smile, “you probably know where it is.”
The house where she’d grown up hadn’t changed that much over the years, and Sophia shouldn’t have been surprised when her mother opened the door to her bedroom. Stuck in a time warp from Sophia’s late teens, the room looked exactly as it had when she left. Same white wrought-iron day bed. Same rainbow of accent colors since she’d never been able to settle on just one or two—the candy-striped pink and white wallpaper, the lilac shag area rug, the powder-blue comforter and vast array of throw pillows. She’d painted the furniture herself, taking the dresser and nightstand from plain white to wild mixes of polka dots, stripes, hearts and flowers.
Seeing it all, Sophia couldn’t speak around the lump in her throat, but there was so much she wanted to say, so many explanations, so many apologies …
But Vanessa said the only words that mattered. “We’ve missed you, sweetheart. I’m so glad you’re home.”
Surrounded by her childhood things and the unconditional love shining in her mother’s eyes, the truth about the baby, about her job, about Jake bubbled up. “Mom—”
“I see you still haven’t learned to pack light,” Sam remarked as he shouldered his way into the room, two suitcases in hand and one tucked beneath his arm like a football.
The opportunity to tell the truth dissipated like smoke, leaving behind only a hint of the chance she’d let slip by, and Sophia forced a smile at her brother. She’d brought almost everything she owned, unsure from day to day what clothes would still fit over her gradually expanding belly.
As soon as Sam swung the suitcases onto the bed, Vanessa said, “And let Jake know his room is ready, too, would you?”
Sophia froze in shock. “Jake? Jake’s staying here?”
“Well, of course, dear,” her mother said with a frown. “You didn’t think we’d expect him to take a room in town, did you?”
Sophia swallowed a lump of nerves. Keeping up the charade might have been Jake’s idea, but she’d agreed to it, hadn’t she? A pretend boyfriend was one thing. But how on earth was she supposed to handle the real Jake Cameron sleeping under the same roof only a few doors away?
Chapter Three
Why would you do this?
Jake’s hands tightened on the back porch railing as Sophia’s words echoed through his thoughts. He wondered what her reaction would have been if he’d told her the truth.
He missed her. He missed her laughter, her smile, and that he’d considered admitting that, even for a split second, told Jake he was already in over his head.
He’d made the biggest mistake an investigator could—he’d gotten too close to the subject. He knew better than to let emotions rule his actions. Logic and patience and detached observation had made him a good private investigator, but for the second job in a row, he’d rushed in without thinking. His body was still healing from the painful lessons he’d learned in Mexico while the damage done in St. Louis … those wounds were harder to define, but they’d left him reeling. Especially since he still didn’t know how Sophia had sneaked past his defenses.
Was it the evening they’d ended up missing their dinner reservation when she saw a small school carnival and wanted to stop? How she’d egged him on as he spent over twenty bucks popping balloons to win her a palm-sized stuffed unicorn? Was it the Cardinals game they went to and the thirty-minute rain delay they spent huddled beneath a shared umbrella, talking and laughing? Normal, everyday activities that made life—made him—feel normal again …
Or had it happened so much sooner than that? The night they first met, when he’d wrestled her bag away from a purse snatcher. He’d ended up with some scrapes on his hand, minor cuts Sophia had insisted on bandaging. The scratches had long since healed, but the soft brush of her skin against his lingered …
Jake let go of the railing and shoved his hands into his back pockets. It didn’t really matter how or when it had happened. Only that he couldn’t let Sophia crawl any deeper into his heart.
When Sophia told him she was pregnant with Todd Dunworthy’s child, Jake had felt like the cruel hand of fate was trying to shove him down a rocky, heaving path, but it was a road he refused to go down again. He wouldn’t. He couldn’t.
Even as he’d listened to Sophia talk about the father of her child—a nameless, faceless nonentity—unwanted memories of Mollie and Josh had crept in. Regret and failure clenched at his gut. It was enough to make Jake feel like less than nothing. Which was exactly what he’d ended up being to Josh despite his best attempts.
The back door opened behind him, and Sam said, “Hey, we’ve got dessert ready if Drew and Nick didn’t already eat it all.”
He wasn’t in the mood to eat or even to join the Pirelli family without Sophia at the table. He was glad when Sam added, “And my mom wanted me to tell you your room’s ready if you want to bring your stuff in from the car.”
The elder Pirellis had made the offer as soon as he arrived, but he’d expected to leave once Sophia showed up. Now, though, he forced himself to accept that he was going to stay. He owed this to Sophia.
If his presence made it easier for her to tell her parents about the baby, then he could stay a day or two. Just to make sure everything was all right and that Sophia was once again safely ensconced in the heart of her family.
After several sleepless nights leading up to her trip home, not to mention tossing and turning in unfamiliar hotel beds while on the road, Sophia expected to curl up into her old twin bed and fall asleep the second her head hit the floral-patterned pillow.
Instead, she found herself staring at the ceiling. Even her recent, slightly silly habit of singing lullabies beneath her breath to her unborn baby hadn’t relaxed her. The excitement of the day had simply caught up with her; little wonder she couldn’t sleep.
And Jake Cameron lying in bed down the hall has nothing to do with it, her conscience mocked.
“Oh, hush,” she muttered to the voice that hadn’t stopped harping at her all evening. Tossing aside the covers, she decided a glass of warm milk would be just the thing to quiet the annoying voice and send her right to sleep.
She’d never cared much for milk, but Theresa had frequently pressed a cold glass or warm mug into her hand. “Milk,” her cousin quipped, “it does a baby good.”
And Sophia was willing to do whatever it took to keep her baby healthy and happy.
A nightlight in the hall lit the way to the kitchen. She could have made it in total darkness, and Sophia had to admit the familiarity gave her a sense of comfort she hadn’t felt in years. But the feeling disappeared as she hurried by the closed guest room door.
She didn’t need to think about Jake sprawled out across a queen bed that was likely too short for his long, lean frame …
Banishing the image from her mind, she rushed toward the kitchen, making a beeline for the fridge. Blinking against the light spilling out as she opened the door, she reached for the half-gallon container.
“Can’t sleep?”
Sophia gasped at the unexpected sound of a deep voice behind her. She spun around and for the first time noticed a dark shadow at the table. He still wore the jeans and T-shirt from earlier, and Sophia wondered how long he’d been sitting there. Her heart picked up its pace as Jake stood and crossed the small kitchen to stand in front of her. The single bulb that had seemed bright before now shone like a spotlight, emphasizing his tousled dark-blond hair, the rough stubble grazing his jaw, and she couldn’t look away.
With the heat coming off Jake’s body and the refrigerated air at her back, Sophia half expected a spontaneous tornado to sweep through the kitchen—a storm certainly seemed to be brewing inside her.
“Sophia.” His voice held a hint of warning, and her gaze instantly rose to meet his. The desire she saw there only amplified the longing spinning through her in ever tightening circles, spiraling down into a pinpoint focus. She wanted him to kiss her. To let the heat and urgency of his mouth against hers wipe away the past weeks. To turn back time to those few, short days when Jake Cameron was a man she could trust, a man she could count on …
Instead of a man who lied.
Realization hitting with an embarrassment that Jake could so easily turn her on even though he had lied, Sophia spun back toward the fridge.
“Uh, no. I couldn’t sleep.” She busied herself with taking out the milk, wishing she could press the cold container against her heated face. “I thought some warm milk might help. I can fix you some if you’d like.”
“I don’t think warm milk will do the trick.”
As the refrigerator door swung shut, the kitchen was once again wrapped in semi-darkness. Just as well, since Sophia feared seeing more in Jake’s expression than she wanted to know. She found a small saucepan right where it had always been and set it on the stove. “You know, just because we’re pretending to be dating doesn’t mean you have to stay. You could say something came up with work.”
“What kind of boyfriend would I be if I missed your parents’ anniversary party?”
“How did you—never mind. It’s your job to know these things.”
Jake stepped closer, making it almost impossible for Sophia to keep her focus on the milk swirling in the small pan. “This is not part of my job.”
You’re not hoping that he’ll, I don’t know, have some crazy explanation and that you guys can pick up where you left off—
Maybe Theresa was right not to pass on the message that Jake had called, Sophia thought, suddenly worried she might end up doing exactly what her cousin feared. That she’d be willing to believe anything Jake said as long as it meant picking up where they left off. Did he know, she wondered in pained embarrassment, how close she’d been to falling into bed with him? That if he’d pressed just a little, she would have gladly given in? And did he think even now it might be that easy again? That she would be that easy … “What about the mugger?”
“What?”
“The would-be purse snatcher and your timely rescue. Was that part of the job? Did you hire him the same way someone hired you?”
“No! No, I did not hire that guy!” He swore beneath his breath. “I would never do anything to purposely hurt you or anyone.”
He’d purposely lied, purposely fooled her into coming far too close to falling for him, and if Jake didn’t know how much that had hurt, Sophia wasn’t about to tell him. Her thoughts were still spinning, and her mind didn’t know how to reconcile the man she thought she knew in St. Louis with the man she didn’t know at all standing in her mother’s kitchen. Unfortunately, judging by the awareness buzzing along her skin like an electrical current, her body didn’t care. Whenever, wherever, whoever Jake Cameron was, she wanted him.
Crossing her arms over her stomach, she pointed out, “I wasn’t hurt.”
“You were scared,” Jake said. “I wouldn’t have put you through that,” he vowed, his handsome face showing only sincerity and honesty.
She longed to believe him, to trust in every word he said. Which only proved she was an even bigger fool than Jake thought. “So it was only a coincidence then?” she mocked. “You showing up right when I most needed a hero?”
After the way Todd treated her—lying, cheating, turning his back when she needed him most—Sophia had longed to believe nice guys still existed in the world. And Jake had so perfectly fit the bill.
From the moment they met, she’d seen something in Jake. Something in the golden flecks in his eyes, the faint wrinkles at the corners, the crooked smile that showed a flash of straight, white teeth. Or maybe it had been the hint of his aftershave, a woodsy scent that reminded her of home—of comfort and safety—and she’d been so sure Jake Cameron was a man she could trust.
“I’m no hero, but I’m not a total jerk, either. It may not make any difference, but I care about you. If you don’t believe anything else, I need you to believe that.”
If he was acting, Jake deserved an Oscar, but Sophia was no longer willing to take anything at face value. “How am I supposed to believe anything you say after the lies you told?”
“I told you the truth before I left.”
Another thing that left her as confused and uncertain as everything that had gone on before … “Why did you tell me the truth? Why not just say you had to go out of town and leave it at that? It wouldn’t be the first time a guy stopped calling.”
“I didn’t want to lie to you.”
Tossing up her hands in exasperation, Sophia had to battle to keep from yelling, well aware of her parents sleeping down the hall. “You’d been lying to me all along!”
“That was the job. Once it was over and I had the information I needed, it was personal.” His gaze skimmed over her—from the top of her tousled head to the too-thin pink T-shirt and drawstring pajama bottoms she wore to her bare feet—striking sparks that reminded Sophia of just how personal things had almost been. “And I didn’t want to lie.”
His words wove a twisted kind of guy logic no woman could possibly comprehend, and Sophia didn’t even try to figure it out; she was far too busy trying to understand why an explanation that made no sense could still start to melt the defenses around her heart.
Sophia woke the next morning to the familiar sound of her cell phone. Eyes still closed, she reached toward the bedside table where she normally plugged the phone into its charger overnight. Her hand waved in thin air—no phone, no nightstand. Her eyes flew open and she remembered. Home, her parents, her brothers … Jake.
She groaned, tempted to pull the covers over her head and pretend the whole world away. But as Theresa’s ringtone continued to play, Sophia knew she might as well face the music. Rolling over to the nightstand on the opposite side of the bed, she pulled the phone from her purse and brought it back beneath the covers with her.
She barely managed a muffled hello before Theresa said, “You were supposed to call.”
“I know, Theresa, and I’m sorry. I am. It’s just that I got home and …”
Was Jake Cameron really here, in her childhood home, pretending to be her boyfriend? It seemed like so unreal that Sophia was afraid to say the words out loud in case it all turned out to be a dream. And, she admitted, even more afraid it wasn’t a dream …
“Let me guess,” her cousin filled in when Sophia trailed off in silence, “does Jake Cameron have anything to do with leaving you speechless?”
“How did—”
“Do you honestly think after the way my mother flaunted the fact that she’d met Jake before your parents that your mother wouldn’t call her to say he’s staying with them? With you? That your boyfriend is staying with you? Sophia—”
Struggling to push aside the blankets with one hand, she said, “I can explain, Theresa.” And she could … only the explanation that still sounded crazy in her own head would likely sound even more so to her cousin. “He arrived before I did, and of course, my parents welcomed him with open arms. They had no reason not to, thanks to me,” she tacked on quickly before Theresa could. “Jake played along because he didn’t want to say anything before I had a chance to talk to them.”
“So how did they take it?” her cousin asked, her voice filled with sympathy.
Sophia bit her lip before admitting, “We’re, um, kind of postponing that part of the truth until after the party.”
Anticipating her cousin’s reaction, Sophia held the phone well away from her ear. Even so, she heard Theresa’s response loud and clear. “What do you mean postponing? And who is we?”
“You don’t understand, Theresa. For the first time in years, my family is looking at me without a boatload of concern and worry in their eyes. Like they’re seeing me as Sophia instead of as their little Fifi.”
Theresa’s mispronunciation of Sophia when they were both toddlers had been the start of the nickname that had followed Sophia well into her teens. She’d convinced most of her family, Sam excluded, to call her by her given name, but she couldn’t help feeling she’d done little to change how they thought of her.
“The party’s next weekend,” she added, “and I’ll come clean then. What’s the harm in waiting?”
Theresa’s silence rang with disapproval. “What’s the harm?” she asked finally. “I’d say Jake Cameron is.”
After reassuring Theresa that she would not be foolish enough to fall for Jake’s lies a second time—and making herself the same promise—Sophia slipped out of bed and pulled on the robe Theresa had given her last Christmas. Sophia could hardly miss the irony of the words scrolling across the comfortable flannel.
You’ve gotta kiss a lot of frogs …
She couldn’t say two was a lot, but it was two too many as far as she was concerned.
Cracking open the bedroom door, she listened to the silence for several seconds before rushing into the bathroom across the hall. For a woman who’d only moments ago sworn Jake Cameron was totally harmless, why was her pulse pounding like she’d made a narrow escape?
“I’m just not ready to face him yet this morning,” she murmured as she pulled her toothbrush from her small makeup bag on the vanity. Morning sickness threatened, and catching sight of her bleary eyes and sleep-rumpled hair, she groaned. “Definitely not ready.”
Following a long, reviving shower, Sophia wrapped a towel turban-style around her wet hair, tightened the belt on her robe and prepared to dash back to her bedroom. It seemed silly now, but one of her big dreams in leaving home had been to finally have a bathroom of her own—no brothers or roommates to share with. Yet like so many of her goals, Sophia had failed to meet that one, too.
Sophia took a deep breath and opened the door. Soon, she thought. Soon she’d be back in Chicago, looking for an entire apartment for her and her baby. She had a new job lined up, too, working with a friend who was about to start her own catering company. She would still be working in the service industry, waiting hand and foot on the rich and impossible, but it was a good job. Plus, along with handling the bookkeeping, Christine’s mother had agreed to babysit for Sophia. And while a catering service might have not be Sophia’s dream, it was Christine’s, and helping her friend achieve that dream would be good enough. She’d have her apartment, she’d have her job, and she’d have her little one.
“Nice robe.” The voice at her back froze Sophia in her tracks when really she should have started running down the hall. “And I thought the pig apron was bad.”
She heard the smile in Jake’s voice, but she refused to turn and face him. Still, she could feel him step closer, could sense the head-to-toe path his golden gaze traveled along her body. Despite the hot shower only moments earlier, goose bumps rose on her arms, and she fought against a shiver tracing fingers down her spine. “I—I like this robe.” Glancing down at the pink material emblazoned with a crown-wearing amphibian, she added, “I think it’s appropriate.”
“Kissed a lot of frogs lately, princess?”
At his faint mockery, Sophia turned to face Jake. His hair was still damp from his own shower, and she caught a hint of the soap her mother had been buying for years, a clean, simple scent that smelled so much more intriguing on him. He’d shaved away the shadow of beard from last night, and she had the crazy thought that she should have let him kiss her, should have had the chance to feel the rasp of stubble against her skin …
“It’s a reminder,” she insisted, tightening her grip on the robe’s neckline as if that might help keep her heated thoughts under wraps, “not to kiss any more.”
“Given up finding Prince Charming?”
“Given up on believing in him,” she muttered.
“Sophia—”
Whatever Jake might have said was lost as her mother’s familiar call rang out from the kitchen. “Sophia, sweetie, breakfast is almost ready!”
Jake glanced over his shoulder with an almost bemused smile. “Breakfast,” he echoed.
“I heard. Blueberry waffles with real maple syrup.”
“Is that what your mother usually makes?”
“Nope. Just my favorite.” And Sophia had little doubt it was what her mother had made for her first morning back.
Jake seemed to realize that, too. “You’ve got a great family.”
“I know.” She loved them all and knew they loved her—even Nick, who’d be the last to admit it. They loved her despite all her mistakes, but Sophia wanted more than that. She wanted to be the daughter, sister, mother her family could be proud of. She wanted to erase the no matter what that always seemed to hang over her family’s I love yous.
Jake stepped closer, regaining her complete attention, as he brushed her damp bangs off her forehead. “When you tell them about the baby, they’re going to support you.”
Another case of loving her and worse, loving her child, despite her mistakes. “I know they will,” she whispered, “no matter what.”
“Sophia.” Sympathy and understanding shone in his golden gaze, the same combination that had so easily slipped through her defenses. What was it about Jake that made her feel like she could tell him anything? Even now that she knew better, why did she still want to open her heart and share her dreams with him? Dreams she’d never told her family, too afraid she’d see nothing but the mistakes of the past and doubts written in their eyes …
“Your family will be right here to help take care of the baby.”
Right here in Clearville … The idea of staying in her hometown was so far from the plan Sophia had for herself and her child, she blinked in surprise. “It’ll be a little hard for them to help when they’re here and I’m back in Chicago.”
A heartbeat of silence pulsed between them before Jake demanded, “Chicago? What are you talking about?”
“Chicago. Where I live,” she pointed out, seeing but not understanding the dark scowl that crossed his face at her words. “We met in St. Louis, but you know I live in Chicago.”
“I know you lived there. When you came back here—”
“For my parents’ anniversary, for a visit.” A long overdue visit, guilt reminded her, stabbing at her conscience. “After my parents’ party—” and after she came clean about everything “—I’m going back.”
“To raise your baby alone?”
His voice had risen, and Sophia instinctively stepped forward and lifted a hand to his mouth. “My parents …” Her words trailed off as her worry about her family overhearing drifted away. The brush of Jake’s lips against her palm sent a shiver running up her arm. Goosebumps spread across her chest, and the awareness in his gaze as it drifted lower made it nearly impossible for Sophia to find the strength to step back when all she really wanted was to wrap her arms around him, press her body to his, and kiss him until they could both pretend what they’d had in St. Louis was real …
Swallowing hard, she backed away on shaky limbs and clutched at the gaping lapels of the robe. “I, um, don’t want them to find out like this.”
It might not have been her intention, but Jake’s voice was certainly lower when he told her, “I don’t get it, Sophia. What’s left for you in Chicago? You lost your job, your home.”
She flinched at the reminder, the words harder to hear coming from him. “I know what I’m doing, Jake.” She could have told him about the little apartment she had in mind, about the job with Christine and her idea of a future that kept her baby first and foremost in mind. But those plans were still up in the air. So far, she hadn’t actually found that little apartment and Christine’s business wasn’t up and running—yet. But until she had a signed lease and business cards in hand, she was keeping her plans to herself.
And besides … “The Dunworthys offered me a great severance package, remember?”
They’d paid—and paid well—for Sophia to keep her mouth shut and to disappear.
“Money is not going to give your child everything he needs,” Jake said flatly.
Sophia blinked, caught off guard at his use of the word “he.” From the moment she discovered she was pregnant, she’d had the feeling her baby was a boy. She’d mentally tried out a dozen boy names, had pictured a little boy’s room filled with trucks and trains and bright primary colors.
“Sophia, listen—”
“No, Jake.” She was already reading far too much into everything little he said. “I don’t expect you to understand, but I’ve made my decision.”
Leaving Jake standing in the hall, Sophia did what she should have in the first place and hurried into her bedroom. She leaned against the closet door, wishing she could block out her own thoughts as easily.
A mother-to-be could be excused for a harmless daydream about the little boy she might soon hold in her arms. But to think Jake shared—or worse, belonged—in that imaginary world simply because of his use of a pronoun was anything but harmless.
Chapter Four
For as long as Sophia could remember, her brothers had met at Rolly’s Diner on Mondays. Years ago, they’d gone there after school. Later, they’d met for lunch as long as their schedules allowed, and Sophia was pretty sure Drew and Sam would be there today.
Her hands tightened on the wheel as she came to the stop sign just before Clearville’s Main Street. For a split second, she wished she’d asked Jake to come along, if only to provide a bit of a buffer between her and her brothers and a distraction from the town gossip mill. Her return was bound to stir up stories of the past, and by no means was Sophia opposed to throwing some of that attention on Jake.
But her dad had offered to show Jake around what was left of the family farm, and Sophia had begged off with the excuse that she was still tired from the trip. She probably should have been more concerned about leaving Jake alone with her father, but he’d likely be better at keeping up the charade than she. He was really good at this kind of thing. She had seen that for herself.
He’d lied to her and used her … and now she was using him to lie to her parents.
As she drove down Main Street, Sophia forced the worries from her mind as she took in the Victorian houses that lined the road—the unique color schemes in powder-blue, purple and white setting each house apart from its neighbor, the wide, welcoming porches, the turrets and gingerbread trim. The quaint village and old-fashioned shops were a draw for the tourists and the town’s main source of commerce.
Finding a parking place along the crowed side street in front of Rolly’s, she squeezed in between two oversized pickups, silent advertising that the diner catered to locals rather than tourists, and climbed from her car.
Sophia took a deep breath before pulling the diner door open. If people in Clearville weren’t already aware that she was back in town, they would know by the end of the afternoon rush.
Конец ознакомительного фрагмента.
Текст предоставлен ООО «ЛитРес».
Прочитайте эту книгу целиком, купив полную легальную версию (https://www.litres.ru/stacy-connelly/her-fill-in-fiance-39900874/) на ЛитРес.
Безопасно оплатить книгу можно банковской картой Visa, MasterCard, Maestro, со счета мобильного телефона, с платежного терминала, в салоне МТС или Связной, через PayPal, WebMoney, Яндекс.Деньги, QIWI Кошелек, бонусными картами или другим удобным Вам способом.